OT/ ” I Have The Pu–y, I Make The Rules”

[CA renter]

FLU,

Hope I’m not cutting you off again… 😉

Couldn’t agree more with everything you said. IMHO, selfishness is the #1 cause of divorce. Too many people go into marriage thinking nothing in their lives should/will change. Big mistake.

Yes, people who are unwilling to make personal sacrifices for the health of the union should not get married. It’s almost 100% guaranteed to fail if they do.

And you’re right about marrying more selfish people. Resentment will build (in the more selfless and least appreciated spouse) and things will spiral out of control at some point. I think this is where you see the divorces after 20 years of marriage and after all the kids have grown. Some people (both men and women) have so much resentment built up (from sacrificing everything while not being appreciated for it), that when they finally finish up with what they perceive to be their committment to their children, they blast out of their marriages as fast as they can. This is why open and honest communication **and empathy** throughout the marriage is so important.

[ucodegen]

True. However, the fact that single mothers constitute a disproportionate number of people living at/below the poverty level makes me think that single/divorced women with children suffer financially compared to women without children.

You can’t use that particular analysis to support the position that divorce is the cause of single mother living at/below poverty level. You add in unwed mothers, teen children bearing children and you add in the issue of the welfare state. We were covering the issue of the effect of divorce. Single women bearing children out of wedlock is a completely different subject and has much different causes, underlying issues etc.

Question: would you have preferred that your parents divorce, or have them work on developing a better marriage and staying married?

Simple.. divorced. We wished they had done it sooner. It was driving all the kids insane.

I guess I see more options that just “stay married and miserable” or divorce.

There are more options than stay-married+miserable vs divorce. But there are also situations where stay together and get it to work.. won’t work.. ever!

[ucodegen]

True. However, the fact that single mothers constitute a disproportionate number of people living at/below the poverty level makes me think that single/divorced women with children suffer financially compared to women without children.

You can’t use that particular analysis to support the position that divorce is the cause of single mother living at/below poverty level. You add in unwed mothers, teen children bearing children and you add in the issue of the welfare state. We were covering the issue of the effect of divorce. Single women bearing children out of wedlock is a completely different subject and has much different causes, underlying issues etc.

Question: would you have preferred that your parents divorce, or have them work on developing a better marriage and staying married?

Simple.. divorced. We wished they had done it sooner. It was driving all the kids insane.

I guess I see more options that just “stay married and miserable” or divorce.

There are more options than stay-married+miserable vs divorce. But there are also situations where stay together and get it to work.. won’t work.. ever!

[ucodegen]

True. However, the fact that single mothers constitute a disproportionate number of people living at/below the poverty level makes me think that single/divorced women with children suffer financially compared to women without children.

You can’t use that particular analysis to support the position that divorce is the cause of single mother living at/below poverty level. You add in unwed mothers, teen children bearing children and you add in the issue of the welfare state. We were covering the issue of the effect of divorce. Single women bearing children out of wedlock is a completely different subject and has much different causes, underlying issues etc.

Question: would you have preferred that your parents divorce, or have them work on developing a better marriage and staying married?

Simple.. divorced. We wished they had done it sooner. It was driving all the kids insane.

I guess I see more options that just “stay married and miserable” or divorce.

There are more options than stay-married+miserable vs divorce. But there are also situations where stay together and get it to work.. won’t work.. ever!

[ucodegen]

True. However, the fact that single mothers constitute a disproportionate number of people living at/below the poverty level makes me think that single/divorced women with children suffer financially compared to women without children.

You can’t use that particular analysis to support the position that divorce is the cause of single mother living at/below poverty level. You add in unwed mothers, teen children bearing children and you add in the issue of the welfare state. We were covering the issue of the effect of divorce. Single women bearing children out of wedlock is a completely different subject and has much different causes, underlying issues etc.

Question: would you have preferred that your parents divorce, or have them work on developing a better marriage and staying married?

Simple.. divorced. We wished they had done it sooner. It was driving all the kids insane.

I guess I see more options that just “stay married and miserable” or divorce.

There are more options than stay-married+miserable vs divorce. But there are also situations where stay together and get it to work.. won’t work.. ever!

[ucodegen]

True. However, the fact that single mothers constitute a disproportionate number of people living at/below the poverty level makes me think that single/divorced women with children suffer financially compared to women without children.

You can’t use that particular analysis to support the position that divorce is the cause of single mother living at/below poverty level. You add in unwed mothers, teen children bearing children and you add in the issue of the welfare state. We were covering the issue of the effect of divorce. Single women bearing children out of wedlock is a completely different subject and has much different causes, underlying issues etc.

Question: would you have preferred that your parents divorce, or have them work on developing a better marriage and staying married?

Simple.. divorced. We wished they had done it sooner. It was driving all the kids insane.

I guess I see more options that just “stay married and miserable” or divorce.

There are more options than stay-married+miserable vs divorce. But there are also situations where stay together and get it to work.. won’t work.. ever!

[ucodegen]

Like it or not, the act of bearing a child creates a very different relationship between a child and a mother. You are forever changed physically, mentally, and emotionally after having biological children.

I think you are ignoring the bonding that occurs with the father. He is the provider and there is a drive to take on this additional responsibility.. instead of buying that new sports car. Here is an interesting question: who is more protective of the daughter with respect to her first date… mother or father?

[ucodegen]

Like it or not, the act of bearing a child creates a very different relationship between a child and a mother. You are forever changed physically, mentally, and emotionally after having biological children.

I think you are ignoring the bonding that occurs with the father. He is the provider and there is a drive to take on this additional responsibility.. instead of buying that new sports car. Here is an interesting question: who is more protective of the daughter with respect to her first date… mother or father?

[ucodegen]

Like it or not, the act of bearing a child creates a very different relationship between a child and a mother. You are forever changed physically, mentally, and emotionally after having biological children.

I think you are ignoring the bonding that occurs with the father. He is the provider and there is a drive to take on this additional responsibility.. instead of buying that new sports car. Here is an interesting question: who is more protective of the daughter with respect to her first date… mother or father?

[ucodegen]

Like it or not, the act of bearing a child creates a very different relationship between a child and a mother. You are forever changed physically, mentally, and emotionally after having biological children.

I think you are ignoring the bonding that occurs with the father. He is the provider and there is a drive to take on this additional responsibility.. instead of buying that new sports car. Here is an interesting question: who is more protective of the daughter with respect to her first date… mother or father?

[ucodegen]

Like it or not, the act of bearing a child creates a very different relationship between a child and a mother. You are forever changed physically, mentally, and emotionally after having biological children.

I think you are ignoring the bonding that occurs with the father. He is the provider and there is a drive to take on this additional responsibility.. instead of buying that new sports car. Here is an interesting question: who is more protective of the daughter with respect to her first date… mother or father?

[NotCranky]

I have read something funny before about mothers being more dedicated, therefore bonding more with their children than the fathers do. It also stated why maternal grandmothers are more generous and loving of their daughter’s children vs. their son’s. The mother and the maternal grandmother know beyond a shadow of a doubt that the children contain their genetic material. This is also why a parent’s favorite kid tends to be the one most like them. I bet your kid looks just like you flu :).

It is typed to be a joke,though there may be some scientific evidence. I think we are bigger than that. I dated a woman with two children and even though they were 4 and 6 when I met her and they loved their dad,and they were brown and I am not, I could have loved them like my own.

[NotCranky]

I have read something funny before about mothers being more dedicated, therefore bonding more with their children than the fathers do. It also stated why maternal grandmothers are more generous and loving of their daughter’s children vs. their son’s. The mother and the maternal grandmother know beyond a shadow of a doubt that the children contain their genetic material. This is also why a parent’s favorite kid tends to be the one most like them. I bet your kid looks just like you flu :).

It is typed to be a joke,though there may be some scientific evidence. I think we are bigger than that. I dated a woman with two children and even though they were 4 and 6 when I met her and they loved their dad,and they were brown and I am not, I could have loved them like my own.

[NotCranky]

I have read something funny before about mothers being more dedicated, therefore bonding more with their children than the fathers do. It also stated why maternal grandmothers are more generous and loving of their daughter’s children vs. their son’s. The mother and the maternal grandmother know beyond a shadow of a doubt that the children contain their genetic material. This is also why a parent’s favorite kid tends to be the one most like them. I bet your kid looks just like you flu :).

It is typed to be a joke,though there may be some scientific evidence. I think we are bigger than that. I dated a woman with two children and even though they were 4 and 6 when I met her and they loved their dad,and they were brown and I am not, I could have loved them like my own.

[NotCranky]

I have read something funny before about mothers being more dedicated, therefore bonding more with their children than the fathers do. It also stated why maternal grandmothers are more generous and loving of their daughter’s children vs. their son’s. The mother and the maternal grandmother know beyond a shadow of a doubt that the children contain their genetic material. This is also why a parent’s favorite kid tends to be the one most like them. I bet your kid looks just like you flu :).

It is typed to be a joke,though there may be some scientific evidence. I think we are bigger than that. I dated a woman with two children and even though they were 4 and 6 when I met her and they loved their dad,and they were brown and I am not, I could have loved them like my own.

[Author]

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