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scaredyclassic
ParticipantSpeculative for any particular person though.
Why is the worker compelled to keep working to provide for the non worker?
That’s not right: everyone needs to adapt.
ParticipantWhen I look at an attractive woman not my wife all I can think is good Lord what a pain in the ass she’d be or as Charles bukowski put it I’d rather drive from Los Angeles to Manhattan in reverse than start over with another woman.
ParticipantI’m glad I was young and broke when I met my wife.
ParticipantGive me her number.
I’ll break it to her.
Participantbreak up. it’s not time.
Participanti shall watch it.
although i wasnt a SAHD, i was the primary goto guy for several years while my wife was a resident/intern for 2 boys, little ones, in day care. it was not so bad really, working and taking care of them, but then again, I am told I was a very casual, not great provider. I let diapers sag longer than the wife wouldve, fed them spaghetti by the tv as we all watched, rocked one to sleep witha toe on a rocky car set while he had a bottle in his mouth while the other was crashed out on my chest. I was lame. but it all turned out ok.
ParticipantThe thought of being a stay at home dad makes me feel ill.
Although I loved Alternadad by Neal pollock.
But I wouldn’t be as opposed to caring for grandchildren.
I would prefer to work though.
ParticipantI can’t figure out what is fair.
ParticipantThe psychic rewards to the SaHP seem like a form of some compensation. The worker may have paid with her soul to stay with her work while the “sacrificer” experienced numerous moments of transcendent bliss.
Participant[quote=CA renter][quote=6packscaredy]Stay at home dad’s give up their most study handsome years?[/quote]
No, but they do give up major income earning potential when they are SAHDs.[/quote]
Speculative.
ParticipantShort term alimony not so bad. Longterm Or lifetime alimony feels like it motivates ineptitude and victimhood.
Basically when you get Married you need a real heavy duty partner.
Anything less, skip it.
Participant[quote=FlyerInHi]I can deal with some character flaws.
But I can’t deal with unreasonable and manufactured drama and upset.I’m willing to be a house husband to a good wife who can afford a nice apartment iwith terrace and private school for the kids in manhattan.
How much is my virility worth?[/quote]
The market will let you know.
Participant[quote=Blogstar][quote=6packscaredy]Well. You can send them to public school. There’s aftercare. They can fend for themselves a bit.
I don’t know. I have some divorce knowledge though I’m sure it’s way different from the inside. It’s bad to depend too heavily on others without providing a clear corresponding benefit.
Or as my wife tells my kids … do not marry a woman who dies not have an oar in the water.
That can be defined a lot of ways but it does seem like some partners are not very useful. Not very good at their tasks and are not sacrificing much. Bad partner choice.[/quote]
Marry someone with a heart and an oar.[/quote]
Personally I focused on the oar. The heart will follow.
Participant[quote=SK in CV][quote=6packscaredy]People are willing to lay down their lives for their children but they’ll be dawned if they are required to get along with a somewhat unreasonable spouse…[/quote]
why should people be required or even the slightest bit motivated to get along with a somewhat unreasonable spouse? I think there are a lot of situations where they shouldn’t be. Situations where divorce is by far the best alternative, even encouraged.[/quote]
Because it’s better for kids to have parents who are happy together. And all people are somewhat unreasonable.
It seems like less of a sacrifice to try to be happy with a crazy spouse than to be dead. So if you’re willing to die for your kids you ought to bexwillkng v to try to be happy even if diffivult
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