Forum Replies Created
-
AuthorPosts
-
NotCranky
Participant[quote=6packscaredy][quote=CA renter][quote=6packscaredy]Is it really giving up anything? Perhaps child raising is a benefit, a gain?[/quote]
You’re not giving up anything if everything goes as planned (lifelong marriage). IMHO, it’s a total benefit to the entire family to have a SAHP who is committed to the family (for families who choose this option…everyone has different priorities and opinions).
If you end up getting divorced, OTOH, you are most certainly sacrificing a lot if you’re a SAHP.[/quote]
Is the worker sacrificing too?[/quote]
I have a pretty big SAHD role, off and on, pretty on now, I am valuable in my household and I like what I get in return. I like what I can do for my family and for myself with this arrangement. If I were a bachelor, I would do my best to be a stay at home bachelor and did. I do a lot of things I would not do if I were single either way. I don’t see a lot more or less sacrifice in that compared to what the worker does, and in this day in age don’t see why anyone has the right to call it that. She is doing what she wants and I am doing what I want. Everyone has to find, or should try, to find a way to approximately do their share. I think the word that should come into play with staying at home is “risk” and people should take responsibility for that too. Husband and wife should share that risk if they agree to the arrangement for the good of kids or even for the good of each other. If the risk is too high , don’t do it.
If you can not pick up and carry on in the case of a divorce, sitting around crying about sacrifice isn’t going to do a thing for you. A lot of people are going to get dumped the day the kids get out the door…a contingent plan should be somewhere in one’s mind. Hopefully getting screwed by the divorce system wouldn’t be part of it.
ParticipantAnyone who is reasonably down to earth , capable or love, and wants to be married will not have to big of a problem with a spouse who is merely “somewhat unreasonable” or somewhat (insert character flaw here). You have to be pretty lame marriage material to think people don’t come with “somewhat” of a flaw of some kind. May as well not get married and instead carry on like a relationship/ opposite sex know-it-all on the Internet.
ParticipantBeen looking at this topic pretty hard lately for schools within our potential transportation scenarios. I guess that in some respects quality is more limited than what most pigg parents are facing. My comments apply to San Diego Unified , El Cajon and Jamul-Dulzura school districts. There may be some similarities to north county, but I think it’s more challenging here…especially since inter-district transfers are in play.
I agree that primary school is pulled towards teaching to the middle or being bogged down by students even lower than that. Teaching to the tests is often done crisis management style to the detriment of the entire school experience. We went through that and it’s scandalous. If your kids are in primary it’s a good time to be a helicopter parent. Many of the teachers try to satisfy the families and academically strong kids who take achievement seriously, but they have the whole assortment of kids in their classes to deal with. IN some cases gate students don’t even have a separate classroom. A lot of homework is coming home and the strong students/families get it done striving for quality and the weak don’t. A lot of people don’t like the homework , but it’s probably better than full on dumb them down. On the other hand, an alternative primary school would be worrisome to me also…not and easy place to be. Even alternative middle schools and high schools better convince me that students are very well grounded in math, science, and language. Some don’t.
No matter what the format for the public or public charter schools, there will not be a school full of “all the best and brightest”. They have a base of kids for whom the school is most convenient and then they have to take kids by lottery schemes of various sorts. Most schools want to grow or keep up the numbers anyway. Many parents opt for these schools because their child had problems at his ‘regular’ school. I am not saying it won’t be better if the fit is good for the child for some reason, science, technology, music.. athletics, whatever, but there is no public school nirvana. I don’t like the social environment of some of the schools that have the best offerings.
In middle school it is potentially less true about teaching down, lots of kids, so there are enough bright motivated children to fill challenging math and science classes and tech oriented electives, music classes as electives, and clubs, IF THE SCHOOL PROVIDES THEM. By high school there is AP ,and HOPEFULLY these other electives and clubs. Our local middle school is very small,only 60 kids per grade, great community, and has a good social environment and some respected teachers, but can’t offer much in electives and clubs , and in my opinion doesn’t try hard enough. So, we look around at alternatives and so do a lot of other parents.
While a “dream school” would be nice, I don’t think there is too much to worry about until high school as long a the parents stay involved enough for the kid to get there with strong math and language skills. Specific areas of interest can be worked on outside of school if need be.
ParticipantMen with cats meet more good women than men with dogs. I would say it is the choice of pet that really matters.
ParticipantI have neve been in , or even taken notice of the return line at Costco…is that weird? But yes, there is a lot of spoiling going on.
ParticipantDecent is a pretty broad range in my book. Not really that bad or good just not a monster or a saint. I would like my cops to not be on the low end of decent but the system seems to demand that most be that way….so this slippage to the dark side is inevitable.
Participant[quote=LAAFTERHOURS][quote=Blogstar]So, when possession and use is legal , taxes can be collected , will it still be illegal to grow your own… or will that be outlawed, “to protect the economy and the consumer”?[/quote]
It is legal to grow your own now in colorado, up to six plants. The thing that sucks is that the outdoor grow season here is super short and you cant take advantage of the endless amounts of sun. We built out a massive communal garden and couldnt really plant warm weather stuff until June 1st. We received heavy snow in Denver on May 1st (my wife’s bday and she was pissed) so it pushed back the start of gardening. Yes you can grow inside but that just seems odd to me.
If I recall correctly, CA has a measure to allow personal grow space for property owners a few years back. It sounds like there is a push for 4 measures in 2014 for CA. If I needed the stuff bad enough, I would still go score a medicinal license to avoid the steep prices.[/quote]
Another reason yet for real estate to stay high in California. Buy now before growing pot and shipping it to Colorado is legal…or be priced out forever.
ParticipantSo, when possession and use is legal , taxes can be collected , will it still be illegal to grow your own… or will that be outlawed, “to protect the economy and the consumer”?
Participant[quote=6packscaredy]True. No. They just wanted to make me watch videos of animals eating other animals.
Hmm.. Kind of ironic now that I thinkbofbit.[/quote]
The animal shows are great….BBC like to sex them up…a little weird.
But at least it’s honest.In one there are these herds of large deer like animals and the males fight so bad in mating season that the losers are too tired to run from lions and they are also banished to the fringe edges of the herd where the lions eat them ….the winners get the “privileges with the females”….middle son…”what the heck? All that for a piggy back ride !” Hey… it’s better than being eaten by a lion.
Participant[quote=6packscaredy][quote=Blogstar]There is a huge irony here.
About a month ago you were ranting about how your 18 year old, and adult children in general, could care less about their parents and only want what they want…keep costing money….we will all become burdens at best.Now it’s dogs vs. humans…makes no sense.
Your kid has cost and will cost way more than any dog..probably has bitten as many people as most dogs, doesn’t love you as much as my dog loves me. And I can get more for my Australian Shepard than you can for you kid and can’t get in trouble for selling him…..Dogs aren’t looking that bad.[/quote]Irony, inconsistency and dark humor are pretty much all I have. Reproduction is not rational.
However I must say we had a very hilarious repartee at dinner today w whole family present. Hard to put a dollar value on it but I’d say roughly $12,677 worth of entertainment tonite alone.
Next on my reading list. Boredom ; a lively history by Peter toohey.[/quote]
Yeah, but did they want to play fetch afterwards? I doubt it.
ParticipantThere is a huge irony here.
About a month ago you were ranting about how your 18 year old, and adult children in general, could care less about their parents and only want what they want…keep costing money….we will all become burdens at best.Now it’s dogs vs. humans…makes no sense.
Your kid has cost and will cost way more than any dog..probably has bitten as many people as most dogs, doesn’t love you as much as my dog loves me. And I can get more for my Australian Shepard than you can for you kid and can’t get in trouble for selling him…..Dogs aren’t looking that bad.ParticipantMy parents and my golden retriever were deceased before my kids were born. Without and real grooming on my part, thave grown to consider all three of them to be ancestors. Yesterday the youngest one said that when our current dog passes, on the day of the dead, he will put flowers on his grave and that of the golden retriever….he wants to throw the flowers out on the ocean for my parents since that’s where their ashes were scattered.
It’s interesting because I am not one of those “dogs are human” people…but it does prove that you are the on who is fucked up about dogs, scaredy.
ParticipantI would have loved to send our kids to Riverview. I’ve also heard great things about that school. Mine are too old now, but ditto the recommendation for anyone with a kinder age child.
ParticipantI’ve checked out the website. Does seem like an interesting school. Good food for thought. Personally, I’d like to emphasize language learning, but our son gravitates to science/tech. This month we’ll attend info meetings at different schools. Thanks again for your efforts to help.
-
AuthorPosts
