August 27, 2006 at 8:40 AM #7339powaysellerParticipant
I am really disappointed in how some people are taking a political exchange of views, and pouting and calling names (PD, comes to mind, but there are others). Why is it so threatening to be exposed to a new idea, I’ve been wondering?
Today, I found my answer on Mauldin:
“[We feel secure in having an explanation for something] And the behavioral psychologists note that this state actually releases chemicals in our brain which make us feel good. We become literally addicted to the simple explanation. The fact that what we “know” (the explanation for the unknowable) is irrelevant or even wrong is not important to the chemical release. And thus we look for reasons.
And that is why some people get so angry when you challenge their beliefs. You are literally taking away the source of their good feeling, like drugs from a junkie, or a boyfriend from a teenage girl.”
I hope some people can grow up a little, and separate their own worth from not only that of their homes, but from their political and religious beliefs.
After all, when you are so pompus as to say “I am right and you all are wrong!”, you are like a little kid having a temper tantrum, stomping off to her room and refusing to play. For myself, I won’t play with brats. And I regret that we couldn’t have a civil exchange about politics, like adults.August 27, 2006 at 8:54 AM #33486ChrispyParticipant
The comments really go south when the topic veers towards politics. I’ve seen a little racism crawling in too – sours the rest of the forum. Rich shouldn’t have to police the comments – this is something we can do amongst ourselves.August 27, 2006 at 10:47 AM #33506PerryChaseParticipant
By reading Chinese philosophy I’ve learned to take things in stride and detach myself from events around me and find my own sense of contentment and happiness.
While I’d like things to work-out my way and I try to influence where I can, I’m perfectly happy sitting back and watching the events unfold. Being a spectator is the best part.
Yeah, real estate will drop. That’s OK by me. Yeah, the war on Iraq is going awry. We’ll only learn the hard way. Like my military friends say, though love is best love.
I can debate issues and mewl them over. But I never take it personally and I sleep perfectly well at night. If my friends don’t agree with me, they are still my friends as long as we treat each other well.August 27, 2006 at 11:34 AM #33511Stu949Participant
Good points all around! I read the Mauldin article as well. People need to make a contious decision to remain objective at all times – most people don’t even know that they are fooling themselves. It’s a very difficult thing to do…August 27, 2006 at 11:56 AM #33520ybcParticipant
Did people discuss politics at the last gathering? I missed that one. I typically don’t talk about politics. I guess that people feel freer to express their opinion online…August 27, 2006 at 1:14 PM #33533
Powayseller, I call people names and pout? Please direct me to those posts. I certainly disagree with you quite a lot but I don’t recall calling you names. A few weeks ago when you threatened to stop posting, I did draw a parallel between that action and a kid who stomps off to their room and refuses to play. It is interesting that you have used the same analogy.August 27, 2006 at 1:15 PM #33534
Oh, and “Brats” is name calling.August 27, 2006 at 2:03 PM #33541anxvarietyParticipant
It’s good that Rich doesn’t police this.. I like forums that are organic and self correcting.. people that don’t like it will move on, and the people that can deal with the reality of it will stay and contribute.. Who has the expectation that everyone will agree or like them? I think having a high opinionated profile is going get people on your case, it just comes with the territory.. it especially will show up on a forum where people can lob grenades anonymously.
I’ve been involved in it before in forums.. sometimes it’s hard to avoid, but I’m trying to contribute as a recovering forum arguer! 🙂
“He who angers you conquers you.” Don’t know who said that, probably lots of people..August 27, 2006 at 4:03 PM #33555sdduuuudeParticipant
PD – I beg to differ.
Saying “I won’t play with brats.” is not name calling.
Saying “You are a brat.” is.August 27, 2006 at 4:23 PM #33559
You are splitting hairs. The subject of her forum was posters misbehaving and those posters are, by her terms, brats.
How would you feel if you witnessed one child say to another child, “I don’t play with stupid people. I’m not going play with you.” It is quite clear that the second child was called a name.
I disagree with her frequently, in fact I disagreed with her this morning. A few hours later and she accuses me of calling people names and pouting. This sort of personal attack is an incivility in itself.
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