Parents kicking their children out of the home

[earlyretirement]

Well, there are always 2 sides to every story. I can understand supporting your kids as much as you can. But I know with some people they don’t act logically or think rationally. I’m not sure I agree with the “reasonably intelligent girl”. I mean, listen to what she wrote about quickly getting engaged to some guy she met on Twitter!

That doesn’t sound like someone that is reasonably intelligent. Normal, intelligent people don’t do things like that. It sounds like someone that is a mess and doesn’t have good common sense skills and logic or reasoning. So maybe her parents kicked her out for a reason.

Definitely if my kids were struggling at 23 I’d take them in. But I would want them to be a productive member of society and not just mooching off of me. They’d have to be working or actively looking for work, etc.

But at the same time, I know of some people that are just lazy by nature and don’t like working. And there isn’t any reason why parents should encourage or support that kind of behavior at 23. So if this girl (and others) are like this…kicking them out might be the best thing you can do to teach them that you can’t get sit back and do nothing in life.

You can see many countries where kids live at home essentially until they are married. And they work, have normal lives, go to school, etc. When I lived in Argentina, I really liked seeing the closeness of families. Females many times would live at home until 30’s or until they got married. Same with males. They would save up, not go crazy with debt and that was common to live at home, save up money and get a true start on life.

I do think sometimes you gotta have some tough love.

[bearishgurl]

Okay, ER, I take back “reasonably intelligent” and insert “well-spoken” and “eloquent” for her age. She may have just been in a particularly vulnerable mindset when she hooked up with this idiot. If you read on, she later realizes her mistake.

There’s something you should know about coastal CA. It shocked me as a young person when I moved here in the 70’s and is STILL very prevalent today. I moved from a place where the first thing a young person did after HS graduation was get their own apt, if they weren’t headed to an out-of-area college soon. Young people who grew up in coastal CA do NOT typically move out of their parents house until their parents insist on it, even if working FT. They bounce back after college and buy new cars while living with parents. Then they have car payments and often student loans. They party on the wknds with their friends. Years later, they often have nothing saved up to move out.

Why this “dependency,” you may ask. It’s simple. If the kid grew up in a nice climate w/a poss BY swimming pool, near a beach, why would they want to rent sh!thole accomodations in an area much less desirable than what they are “accustomed to?” Especially after spending 4 yrs in dorms and sharing crap rentals while attending college. Many go to college and grad school in SD and never leave home.

It’s not like your South American counterparts who are trying to become independent. For many SoCal young people, there is often no reason to become independent if their (now tired) “boomer” parents have the “ultimate” accomodations. Why not spend that rent $$ on yourself?

It’s up to the parent to push independence and self-sufficiency as most kids today do not have the incentive to do so themselves.

[bearishgurl]

Okay, ER, I take back “reasonably intelligent” and insert “well-spoken” and “eloquent” for her age. She may have just been in a particularly vulnerable mindset when she hooked up with this idiot. If you read on, she later realizes her mistake.

There’s something you should know about coastal CA. It shocked me as a young person when I moved here in the 70’s and is STILL very prevalent today. I moved from a place where the first thing a young person did after HS graduation was get their own apt, if they weren’t headed to an out-of-area college soon. Young people who grew up in coastal CA do NOT typically move out of their parents house until their parents insist on it, even if working FT. They bounce back after college and buy new cars while living with parents. Then they have car payments and often student loans. They party on the wknds with their friends. Years later, they often have nothing saved up to move out.

Why this “dependency,” you may ask. It’s simple. If the kid grew up in a nice climate w/a poss BY swimming pool, near a beach, why would they want to rent sh!thole accomodations in an area much less desirable than what they are “accustomed to?” Especially after spending 4 yrs in dorms and sharing crap rentals while attending college. Many go to college and grad school in SD and never leave home.

It’s not like your South American counterparts who are trying to become independent. For many SoCal young people, there is often no reason to become independent if their (now tired) “boomer” parents have the “ultimate” accomodations. Why not spend that rent $$ on yourself?

It’s up to the parent to push independence and self-sufficiency as most kids today do not have the incentive to do so themselves.

[bearishgurl]

Okay, ER, I take back “reasonably intelligent” and insert “well-spoken” and “eloquent” for her age. She may have just been in a particularly vulnerable mindset when she hooked up with this idiot. If you read on, she later realizes her mistake.

There’s something you should know about coastal CA. It shocked me as a young person when I moved here in the 70’s and is STILL very prevalent today. I moved from a place where the first thing a young person did after HS graduation was get their own apt, if they weren’t headed to an out-of-area college soon. Young people who grew up in coastal CA do NOT typically move out of their parents house until their parents insist on it, even if working FT. They bounce back after college and buy new cars while living with parents. Then they have car payments and often student loans. They party on the wknds with their friends. Years later, they often have nothing saved up to move out.

Why this “dependency,” you may ask. It’s simple. If the kid grew up in a nice climate w/a poss BY swimming pool, near a beach, why would they want to rent sh!thole accomodations in an area much less desirable than what they are “accustomed to?” Especially after spending 4 yrs in dorms and sharing crap rentals while attending college. Many go to college and grad school in SD and never leave home.

It’s not like your South American counterparts who are trying to become independent. For many SoCal young people, there is often no reason to become independent if their (now tired) “boomer” parents have the “ultimate” accomodations. Why not spend that rent $$ on yourself?

It’s up to the parent to push independence and self-sufficiency as most kids today do not have the incentive to do so themselves.

[bearishgurl]

Okay, ER, I take back “reasonably intelligent” and insert “well-spoken” and “eloquent” for her age. She may have just been in a particularly vulnerable mindset when she hooked up with this idiot. If you read on, she later realizes her mistake.

There’s something you should know about coastal CA. It shocked me as a young person when I moved here in the 70’s and is STILL very prevalent today. I moved from a place where the first thing a young person did after HS graduation was get their own apt, if they weren’t headed to an out-of-area college soon. Young people who grew up in coastal CA do NOT typically move out of their parents house until their parents insist on it, even if working FT. They bounce back after college and buy new cars while living with parents. Then they have car payments and often student loans. They party on the wknds with their friends. Years later, they often have nothing saved up to move out.

Why this “dependency,” you may ask. It’s simple. If the kid grew up in a nice climate w/a poss BY swimming pool, near a beach, why would they want to rent sh!thole accomodations in an area much less desirable than what they are “accustomed to?” Especially after spending 4 yrs in dorms and sharing crap rentals while attending college. Many go to college and grad school in SD and never leave home.

It’s not like your South American counterparts who are trying to become independent. For many SoCal young people, there is often no reason to become independent if their (now tired) “boomer” parents have the “ultimate” accomodations. Why not spend that rent $$ on yourself?

It’s up to the parent to push independence and self-sufficiency as most kids today do not have the incentive to do so themselves.

[bearishgurl]

Okay, ER, I take back “reasonably intelligent” and insert “well-spoken” and “eloquent” for her age. She may have just been in a particularly vulnerable mindset when she hooked up with this idiot. If you read on, she later realizes her mistake.

There’s something you should know about coastal CA. It shocked me as a young person when I moved here in the 70’s and is STILL very prevalent today. I moved from a place where the first thing a young person did after HS graduation was get their own apt, if they weren’t headed to an out-of-area college soon. Young people who grew up in coastal CA do NOT typically move out of their parents house until their parents insist on it, even if working FT. They bounce back after college and buy new cars while living with parents. Then they have car payments and often student loans. They party on the wknds with their friends. Years later, they often have nothing saved up to move out.

Why this “dependency,” you may ask. It’s simple. If the kid grew up in a nice climate w/a poss BY swimming pool, near a beach, why would they want to rent sh!thole accomodations in an area much less desirable than what they are “accustomed to?” Especially after spending 4 yrs in dorms and sharing crap rentals while attending college. Many go to college and grad school in SD and never leave home.

It’s not like your South American counterparts who are trying to become independent. For many SoCal young people, there is often no reason to become independent if their (now tired) “boomer” parents have the “ultimate” accomodations. Why not spend that rent $$ on yourself?

It’s up to the parent to push independence and self-sufficiency as most kids today do not have the incentive to do so themselves.

[UCGal]

I agree w early retirement… there are a lot of kids who aren’t working or going to school and basically need, IMO, a kick in the pants to stop sponging. I have a coworker who can’t figure out how to motivate his daughter into getting a job or getting serious about college. His wife refuss to consider the tough love approach, so they’re enabling her less than productive lifestyle.

And BG – I grew up in coastal San Diego in the 70s… I wasn’t ready for college when I graduated high school… but I got a job and moved out 2 weeks after my 18th birthday… I think it’s more of a generational thing than a geographical thing that is keeping kids at home these days. I see kids lingering at home well into their 20’s back east too.

[UCGal]

I agree w early retirement… there are a lot of kids who aren’t working or going to school and basically need, IMO, a kick in the pants to stop sponging. I have a coworker who can’t figure out how to motivate his daughter into getting a job or getting serious about college. His wife refuss to consider the tough love approach, so they’re enabling her less than productive lifestyle.

And BG – I grew up in coastal San Diego in the 70s… I wasn’t ready for college when I graduated high school… but I got a job and moved out 2 weeks after my 18th birthday… I think it’s more of a generational thing than a geographical thing that is keeping kids at home these days. I see kids lingering at home well into their 20’s back east too.

[UCGal]

I agree w early retirement… there are a lot of kids who aren’t working or going to school and basically need, IMO, a kick in the pants to stop sponging. I have a coworker who can’t figure out how to motivate his daughter into getting a job or getting serious about college. His wife refuss to consider the tough love approach, so they’re enabling her less than productive lifestyle.

And BG – I grew up in coastal San Diego in the 70s… I wasn’t ready for college when I graduated high school… but I got a job and moved out 2 weeks after my 18th birthday… I think it’s more of a generational thing than a geographical thing that is keeping kids at home these days. I see kids lingering at home well into their 20’s back east too.

[UCGal]

I agree w early retirement… there are a lot of kids who aren’t working or going to school and basically need, IMO, a kick in the pants to stop sponging. I have a coworker who can’t figure out how to motivate his daughter into getting a job or getting serious about college. His wife refuss to consider the tough love approach, so they’re enabling her less than productive lifestyle.

And BG – I grew up in coastal San Diego in the 70s… I wasn’t ready for college when I graduated high school… but I got a job and moved out 2 weeks after my 18th birthday… I think it’s more of a generational thing than a geographical thing that is keeping kids at home these days. I see kids lingering at home well into their 20’s back east too.

[UCGal]

I agree w early retirement… there are a lot of kids who aren’t working or going to school and basically need, IMO, a kick in the pants to stop sponging. I have a coworker who can’t figure out how to motivate his daughter into getting a job or getting serious about college. His wife refuss to consider the tough love approach, so they’re enabling her less than productive lifestyle.

And BG – I grew up in coastal San Diego in the 70s… I wasn’t ready for college when I graduated high school… but I got a job and moved out 2 weeks after my 18th birthday… I think it’s more of a generational thing than a geographical thing that is keeping kids at home these days. I see kids lingering at home well into their 20’s back east too.

[briansd1]

I think that it could be a cost-of-housing-as-a-proportion-of-income kinda thing.

In areas or countries where housing consumes a large portion of income, kids will stay at home longer into adulthood out of necessity.

[briansd1]

I think that it could be a cost-of-housing-as-a-proportion-of-income kinda thing.

In areas or countries where housing consumes a large portion of income, kids will stay at home longer into adulthood out of necessity.

[briansd1]

I think that it could be a cost-of-housing-as-a-proportion-of-income kinda thing.

In areas or countries where housing consumes a large portion of income, kids will stay at home longer into adulthood out of necessity.

[briansd1]

I think that it could be a cost-of-housing-as-a-proportion-of-income kinda thing.

In areas or countries where housing consumes a large portion of income, kids will stay at home longer into adulthood out of necessity.

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