OT — Article: “10 Reasons to Skip Expensive Colleges”

[carli]

As a parent who is in the midst of college apps with a high school (soon to be) senior, and another one in college, I generally agree with the theme of the article, which is a very popular sentiment these days.

However, especially for those of us in CA, there CAN be financial deals out there at private schools, especially those further away. For example, with several private schools on the east coast, for child #1, we found it cost about the same as a UC (which is currently approx 30-32k/year inc room and board) taking merit aid/grants into account (private school full cost without aid is 50k-ish). The difference is that private schools value having a mix of students, not only ethnically but geographically and based on skills, talents, socio-economic background, etc. They look more closely at the individual, and if your child fits a piece of the puzzle they’re looking for or find valuable, then some aid will come his/her way. Doesn’t always happen, but if your child applies to a range of schools, and has a unique characteristic or two, there are bound to be one or two that will hit.

The community college route (ideally with a later transfer in to a UC) is of course the best financial deal going. Sometimes, though, a community college environment is not at all the right fit for an 18-yr-old, and I’ve heard countless stories of very unsuccessful academic experiences at CCs when the kid becomes completey derailed, and then you’re wasting 100% of your tuition and ending up with a kid who usually ends up in a dead-end job and has wasted a lot of time so no bargain there. For many kids, this time of life is an important fork in the road, and like it or not, the maturity, self-motivation, self-discipline, decision-making skills and judgment may not be sufficiently developed for such a young person to take advantage of all that a CC offers. Yes, we can all comment on how these kids “should” be and the skills that they “should” have at this stage, but each kid matures differently. It all just depends on the individual.

[scaredyclassic]

this topic is tough. my parents said, just go to the “best” most prestigious most expensive college you get into. in retrospect, it’s unclear why. it seemed like the right idea at the tiem.

I’m telling my high school junior, who is demonstrably smarter than me and who now has a kind of high gpa based on getting his low grades revised after high AP scores (seems kind of wrong, but when the system works in your favor, it’s hard to critique it too harshly) hey, dude, let’s go with the community college thing, even if you could get into UC whatever, and work your way up the ladder. maybe get a job, live life, do some serious rock climbing, grow up a little, stay at home. plus, you can skip the stupid SAT, I think.

if three kids do 6 years total at communiy college, jeez, that’s like $150,000 or more in savings in terms of debt load, room and board savings, etc…..not to mention the college application fees and moving expenses…

that number is large. i’d rather give them lots of financial support directly, than have them take on any student loan debt for a better school.

on the other hand, maybe I’m screwing up, being a cheapskate, and setting them up for “derailment”…i guess i’ll just watch him and make my best judgment.

plus he’ll have so many damn AP credits he’ll probably be able to get through the CC route pretty quick. I don’t know. it’s kind of scary. I hate to
impair his life because i’m debt and risk averse. ont he other hand, i’m pretty damn sure it’s the right thing to do not just because of the money, but because i have confidence he can make it through the whole process…

[scaredyclassic]

this topic is tough. my parents said, just go to the “best” most prestigious most expensive college you get into. in retrospect, it’s unclear why. it seemed like the right idea at the tiem.

I’m telling my high school junior, who is demonstrably smarter than me and who now has a kind of high gpa based on getting his low grades revised after high AP scores (seems kind of wrong, but when the system works in your favor, it’s hard to critique it too harshly) hey, dude, let’s go with the community college thing, even if you could get into UC whatever, and work your way up the ladder. maybe get a job, live life, do some serious rock climbing, grow up a little, stay at home. plus, you can skip the stupid SAT, I think.

if three kids do 6 years total at communiy college, jeez, that’s like $150,000 or more in savings in terms of debt load, room and board savings, etc…..not to mention the college application fees and moving expenses…

that number is large. i’d rather give them lots of financial support directly, than have them take on any student loan debt for a better school.

on the other hand, maybe I’m screwing up, being a cheapskate, and setting them up for “derailment”…i guess i’ll just watch him and make my best judgment.

plus he’ll have so many damn AP credits he’ll probably be able to get through the CC route pretty quick. I don’t know. it’s kind of scary. I hate to
impair his life because i’m debt and risk averse. ont he other hand, i’m pretty damn sure it’s the right thing to do not just because of the money, but because i have confidence he can make it through the whole process…

[scaredyclassic]

this topic is tough. my parents said, just go to the “best” most prestigious most expensive college you get into. in retrospect, it’s unclear why. it seemed like the right idea at the tiem.

I’m telling my high school junior, who is demonstrably smarter than me and who now has a kind of high gpa based on getting his low grades revised after high AP scores (seems kind of wrong, but when the system works in your favor, it’s hard to critique it too harshly) hey, dude, let’s go with the community college thing, even if you could get into UC whatever, and work your way up the ladder. maybe get a job, live life, do some serious rock climbing, grow up a little, stay at home. plus, you can skip the stupid SAT, I think.

if three kids do 6 years total at communiy college, jeez, that’s like $150,000 or more in savings in terms of debt load, room and board savings, etc…..not to mention the college application fees and moving expenses…

that number is large. i’d rather give them lots of financial support directly, than have them take on any student loan debt for a better school.

on the other hand, maybe I’m screwing up, being a cheapskate, and setting them up for “derailment”…i guess i’ll just watch him and make my best judgment.

plus he’ll have so many damn AP credits he’ll probably be able to get through the CC route pretty quick. I don’t know. it’s kind of scary. I hate to
impair his life because i’m debt and risk averse. ont he other hand, i’m pretty damn sure it’s the right thing to do not just because of the money, but because i have confidence he can make it through the whole process…

[scaredyclassic]

this topic is tough. my parents said, just go to the “best” most prestigious most expensive college you get into. in retrospect, it’s unclear why. it seemed like the right idea at the tiem.

I’m telling my high school junior, who is demonstrably smarter than me and who now has a kind of high gpa based on getting his low grades revised after high AP scores (seems kind of wrong, but when the system works in your favor, it’s hard to critique it too harshly) hey, dude, let’s go with the community college thing, even if you could get into UC whatever, and work your way up the ladder. maybe get a job, live life, do some serious rock climbing, grow up a little, stay at home. plus, you can skip the stupid SAT, I think.

if three kids do 6 years total at communiy college, jeez, that’s like $150,000 or more in savings in terms of debt load, room and board savings, etc…..not to mention the college application fees and moving expenses…

that number is large. i’d rather give them lots of financial support directly, than have them take on any student loan debt for a better school.

on the other hand, maybe I’m screwing up, being a cheapskate, and setting them up for “derailment”…i guess i’ll just watch him and make my best judgment.

plus he’ll have so many damn AP credits he’ll probably be able to get through the CC route pretty quick. I don’t know. it’s kind of scary. I hate to
impair his life because i’m debt and risk averse. ont he other hand, i’m pretty damn sure it’s the right thing to do not just because of the money, but because i have confidence he can make it through the whole process…

[scaredyclassic]

this topic is tough. my parents said, just go to the “best” most prestigious most expensive college you get into. in retrospect, it’s unclear why. it seemed like the right idea at the tiem.

I’m telling my high school junior, who is demonstrably smarter than me and who now has a kind of high gpa based on getting his low grades revised after high AP scores (seems kind of wrong, but when the system works in your favor, it’s hard to critique it too harshly) hey, dude, let’s go with the community college thing, even if you could get into UC whatever, and work your way up the ladder. maybe get a job, live life, do some serious rock climbing, grow up a little, stay at home. plus, you can skip the stupid SAT, I think.

if three kids do 6 years total at communiy college, jeez, that’s like $150,000 or more in savings in terms of debt load, room and board savings, etc…..not to mention the college application fees and moving expenses…

that number is large. i’d rather give them lots of financial support directly, than have them take on any student loan debt for a better school.

on the other hand, maybe I’m screwing up, being a cheapskate, and setting them up for “derailment”…i guess i’ll just watch him and make my best judgment.

plus he’ll have so many damn AP credits he’ll probably be able to get through the CC route pretty quick. I don’t know. it’s kind of scary. I hate to
impair his life because i’m debt and risk averse. ont he other hand, i’m pretty damn sure it’s the right thing to do not just because of the money, but because i have confidence he can make it through the whole process…

[LAAFTERHOURS]

My parents sent me to a private university in the state of NY and my tuition was roughly 19K a year (1994-1998). Room and board was reasonable because of location (senior year off campus house was 1200 for each semester Aug-Dec and Jan-May)

I would say that I got minimal value out of school. If anything, I learned street smarts over book smarts. Most of the tools I have today are from post collegiate studies. I cant wait to see what some of these schools cost when our daughter is nearing 18. I will be looking to relocate to a state with good state schools that are on the lower end of the tuition scale.

[LAAFTERHOURS]

My parents sent me to a private university in the state of NY and my tuition was roughly 19K a year (1994-1998). Room and board was reasonable because of location (senior year off campus house was 1200 for each semester Aug-Dec and Jan-May)

I would say that I got minimal value out of school. If anything, I learned street smarts over book smarts. Most of the tools I have today are from post collegiate studies. I cant wait to see what some of these schools cost when our daughter is nearing 18. I will be looking to relocate to a state with good state schools that are on the lower end of the tuition scale.

[LAAFTERHOURS]

My parents sent me to a private university in the state of NY and my tuition was roughly 19K a year (1994-1998). Room and board was reasonable because of location (senior year off campus house was 1200 for each semester Aug-Dec and Jan-May)

I would say that I got minimal value out of school. If anything, I learned street smarts over book smarts. Most of the tools I have today are from post collegiate studies. I cant wait to see what some of these schools cost when our daughter is nearing 18. I will be looking to relocate to a state with good state schools that are on the lower end of the tuition scale.

[LAAFTERHOURS]

My parents sent me to a private university in the state of NY and my tuition was roughly 19K a year (1994-1998). Room and board was reasonable because of location (senior year off campus house was 1200 for each semester Aug-Dec and Jan-May)

I would say that I got minimal value out of school. If anything, I learned street smarts over book smarts. Most of the tools I have today are from post collegiate studies. I cant wait to see what some of these schools cost when our daughter is nearing 18. I will be looking to relocate to a state with good state schools that are on the lower end of the tuition scale.

[LAAFTERHOURS]

My parents sent me to a private university in the state of NY and my tuition was roughly 19K a year (1994-1998). Room and board was reasonable because of location (senior year off campus house was 1200 for each semester Aug-Dec and Jan-May)

I would say that I got minimal value out of school. If anything, I learned street smarts over book smarts. Most of the tools I have today are from post collegiate studies. I cant wait to see what some of these schools cost when our daughter is nearing 18. I will be looking to relocate to a state with good state schools that are on the lower end of the tuition scale.

[carli]

walter, sounds like your kid is a great candidate for CC and would take advantage of all it offers while also gaining other super valuable life skills such as working for awhile as well as having fun, growing up a little, etc.

Other kids aren’t quite as “smart” and ready for that environment, and it’s almost like they need a bridge from high school to the next stage, where there’s an environment that – well, let’s just say it – coddles them a bit more. Of course, we hate to admit it and feel guilty that our kids at this stage can’t just suck it up and be self-motivated enough to ignore distractions. And it goes without saying that plenty of distractions also exist at private colleges.

But, here’s an example of one kid we know well who got “derailed” at CC…this kid was bright, interesting and successful all during high school. She was super creative and a great writer, and got a partial merit scholarship to a small private liberal arts school. She went for one year and although she loved it, raved about it, said it felt like “home”, she came back with way less than stellar grades. Her parents said “enough” and thought they’d teach her a lesson by enrolling her in the local CC for at least a semester, which she started the following fall. She also took a part-time job.

Long story short, it’s now about 3 years later and she met a guy the first few weeks of attending CC who ended up being a disaster for her, to put it mildly, and she left school by the end of that year, moved in with him and got married to him within 6 months. She worked at Victoria’s Secret in the mall, and he worked in a tattoo shop. Who knows what else is going on because she stopped communicating with her family very often. Now, several years later, she recently broke down and told her mom in a tearful phone conversation that she’s been physically and emotionally abused in the relationship and wants to divorce the guy and move back home (almost 22 now) and start all over.

Of course, her attendance at CC did not “cause” this situation, and other bad things probably would have happened in her life had she continued at private college since obviously her maturity and judgment was lacking in many ways. BUT, her parents often wonder if it would have been better, even with her floundering a bit at her private liberal arts school, to just send her back there and let her slug it out through a few more years. I think they think she would have been in a more positive environment there because the private college had MUCH more oversight and counseling and direct involvement with her. And most kids were fairly motivated to finish their 4 years.

Just a single story…your mileage may (hopefully will!) vary.

[carli]

walter, sounds like your kid is a great candidate for CC and would take advantage of all it offers while also gaining other super valuable life skills such as working for awhile as well as having fun, growing up a little, etc.

Other kids aren’t quite as “smart” and ready for that environment, and it’s almost like they need a bridge from high school to the next stage, where there’s an environment that – well, let’s just say it – coddles them a bit more. Of course, we hate to admit it and feel guilty that our kids at this stage can’t just suck it up and be self-motivated enough to ignore distractions. And it goes without saying that plenty of distractions also exist at private colleges.

But, here’s an example of one kid we know well who got “derailed” at CC…this kid was bright, interesting and successful all during high school. She was super creative and a great writer, and got a partial merit scholarship to a small private liberal arts school. She went for one year and although she loved it, raved about it, said it felt like “home”, she came back with way less than stellar grades. Her parents said “enough” and thought they’d teach her a lesson by enrolling her in the local CC for at least a semester, which she started the following fall. She also took a part-time job.

Long story short, it’s now about 3 years later and she met a guy the first few weeks of attending CC who ended up being a disaster for her, to put it mildly, and she left school by the end of that year, moved in with him and got married to him within 6 months. She worked at Victoria’s Secret in the mall, and he worked in a tattoo shop. Who knows what else is going on because she stopped communicating with her family very often. Now, several years later, she recently broke down and told her mom in a tearful phone conversation that she’s been physically and emotionally abused in the relationship and wants to divorce the guy and move back home (almost 22 now) and start all over.

Of course, her attendance at CC did not “cause” this situation, and other bad things probably would have happened in her life had she continued at private college since obviously her maturity and judgment was lacking in many ways. BUT, her parents often wonder if it would have been better, even with her floundering a bit at her private liberal arts school, to just send her back there and let her slug it out through a few more years. I think they think she would have been in a more positive environment there because the private college had MUCH more oversight and counseling and direct involvement with her. And most kids were fairly motivated to finish their 4 years.

Just a single story…your mileage may (hopefully will!) vary.

[carli]

walter, sounds like your kid is a great candidate for CC and would take advantage of all it offers while also gaining other super valuable life skills such as working for awhile as well as having fun, growing up a little, etc.

Other kids aren’t quite as “smart” and ready for that environment, and it’s almost like they need a bridge from high school to the next stage, where there’s an environment that – well, let’s just say it – coddles them a bit more. Of course, we hate to admit it and feel guilty that our kids at this stage can’t just suck it up and be self-motivated enough to ignore distractions. And it goes without saying that plenty of distractions also exist at private colleges.

But, here’s an example of one kid we know well who got “derailed” at CC…this kid was bright, interesting and successful all during high school. She was super creative and a great writer, and got a partial merit scholarship to a small private liberal arts school. She went for one year and although she loved it, raved about it, said it felt like “home”, she came back with way less than stellar grades. Her parents said “enough” and thought they’d teach her a lesson by enrolling her in the local CC for at least a semester, which she started the following fall. She also took a part-time job.

Long story short, it’s now about 3 years later and she met a guy the first few weeks of attending CC who ended up being a disaster for her, to put it mildly, and she left school by the end of that year, moved in with him and got married to him within 6 months. She worked at Victoria’s Secret in the mall, and he worked in a tattoo shop. Who knows what else is going on because she stopped communicating with her family very often. Now, several years later, she recently broke down and told her mom in a tearful phone conversation that she’s been physically and emotionally abused in the relationship and wants to divorce the guy and move back home (almost 22 now) and start all over.

Of course, her attendance at CC did not “cause” this situation, and other bad things probably would have happened in her life had she continued at private college since obviously her maturity and judgment was lacking in many ways. BUT, her parents often wonder if it would have been better, even with her floundering a bit at her private liberal arts school, to just send her back there and let her slug it out through a few more years. I think they think she would have been in a more positive environment there because the private college had MUCH more oversight and counseling and direct involvement with her. And most kids were fairly motivated to finish their 4 years.

Just a single story…your mileage may (hopefully will!) vary.

[carli]

walter, sounds like your kid is a great candidate for CC and would take advantage of all it offers while also gaining other super valuable life skills such as working for awhile as well as having fun, growing up a little, etc.

Other kids aren’t quite as “smart” and ready for that environment, and it’s almost like they need a bridge from high school to the next stage, where there’s an environment that – well, let’s just say it – coddles them a bit more. Of course, we hate to admit it and feel guilty that our kids at this stage can’t just suck it up and be self-motivated enough to ignore distractions. And it goes without saying that plenty of distractions also exist at private colleges.

But, here’s an example of one kid we know well who got “derailed” at CC…this kid was bright, interesting and successful all during high school. She was super creative and a great writer, and got a partial merit scholarship to a small private liberal arts school. She went for one year and although she loved it, raved about it, said it felt like “home”, she came back with way less than stellar grades. Her parents said “enough” and thought they’d teach her a lesson by enrolling her in the local CC for at least a semester, which she started the following fall. She also took a part-time job.

Long story short, it’s now about 3 years later and she met a guy the first few weeks of attending CC who ended up being a disaster for her, to put it mildly, and she left school by the end of that year, moved in with him and got married to him within 6 months. She worked at Victoria’s Secret in the mall, and he worked in a tattoo shop. Who knows what else is going on because she stopped communicating with her family very often. Now, several years later, she recently broke down and told her mom in a tearful phone conversation that she’s been physically and emotionally abused in the relationship and wants to divorce the guy and move back home (almost 22 now) and start all over.

Of course, her attendance at CC did not “cause” this situation, and other bad things probably would have happened in her life had she continued at private college since obviously her maturity and judgment was lacking in many ways. BUT, her parents often wonder if it would have been better, even with her floundering a bit at her private liberal arts school, to just send her back there and let her slug it out through a few more years. I think they think she would have been in a more positive environment there because the private college had MUCH more oversight and counseling and direct involvement with her. And most kids were fairly motivated to finish their 4 years.

Just a single story…your mileage may (hopefully will!) vary.

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