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UCGal
ParticipantI offered to buy one for my husband. He declined.
He did accept the fact that I wanted a sapphire rather than a diamond (my birthstone is sapphire.) It was WAAAY cheaper because of this. (We knew we were going to get married from about date 3 or 4… Just waited a decent time to make sure.)I would have been fine with no ring. That said – I wear my engagement ring fulltime… It’s silly sentimental. I’ve been wearing it for more than 10 years. It’s stupid, but it reminds me of our bond every time I look at it. Sappy, I know. And I’m not the sappy type.
I’m curious Dave… how old are you?
My husband was a lifelong bachelor… He was 47 when we got married. He’d never been married… never fully committed to living with anyone prior – although he’d been “virtually” living with 2 long term girlfriends prior to me. (Serially, not parallel)I was reasonably content being single too – I was 38 when we got married – first marriage for me. I’d wanted kids – but had pretty much put that aside by the time I met my husband.
We both had comfortable, happy lives as single people prior to marriage. That said – we’re happy together… although there’s less freedom post kids. But our kids are great and we have no regrets.
Dogs can learn new tricks… You never know. LOL.
UCGal
ParticipantI offered to buy one for my husband. He declined.
He did accept the fact that I wanted a sapphire rather than a diamond (my birthstone is sapphire.) It was WAAAY cheaper because of this. (We knew we were going to get married from about date 3 or 4… Just waited a decent time to make sure.)I would have been fine with no ring. That said – I wear my engagement ring fulltime… It’s silly sentimental. I’ve been wearing it for more than 10 years. It’s stupid, but it reminds me of our bond every time I look at it. Sappy, I know. And I’m not the sappy type.
I’m curious Dave… how old are you?
My husband was a lifelong bachelor… He was 47 when we got married. He’d never been married… never fully committed to living with anyone prior – although he’d been “virtually” living with 2 long term girlfriends prior to me. (Serially, not parallel)I was reasonably content being single too – I was 38 when we got married – first marriage for me. I’d wanted kids – but had pretty much put that aside by the time I met my husband.
We both had comfortable, happy lives as single people prior to marriage. That said – we’re happy together… although there’s less freedom post kids. But our kids are great and we have no regrets.
Dogs can learn new tricks… You never know. LOL.
UCGal
Participant[quote=Russell]It looks like people are comparing childcare, which is easy to put a price on, to parenting which is not. Childcare centers, even the good ones, don’t even come close as a substitute for attachment parenting. A dedicated and special nanny could approximate the role of a parent, but sooner or later the kid realizes he or she isn’t having much of a relationship with their biological parents and will be harmed, to at least come degree, by the lack.
[/quote]
I never thought I’d see attachment parenting discussed on Piggington.(confession – I was a reluctant “attachment parent”… I had a child that seemed to need/demand it even though it was outside my comfort zone. I can hang with the best of them with discussions of co-sleeping, baby-wearing, etc… even though I would never have imagined it prior to parenting… Amazing how kids change our perspectives.)
UCGal
Participant[quote=Russell]It looks like people are comparing childcare, which is easy to put a price on, to parenting which is not. Childcare centers, even the good ones, don’t even come close as a substitute for attachment parenting. A dedicated and special nanny could approximate the role of a parent, but sooner or later the kid realizes he or she isn’t having much of a relationship with their biological parents and will be harmed, to at least come degree, by the lack.
[/quote]
I never thought I’d see attachment parenting discussed on Piggington.(confession – I was a reluctant “attachment parent”… I had a child that seemed to need/demand it even though it was outside my comfort zone. I can hang with the best of them with discussions of co-sleeping, baby-wearing, etc… even though I would never have imagined it prior to parenting… Amazing how kids change our perspectives.)
UCGal
Participant[quote=Russell]It looks like people are comparing childcare, which is easy to put a price on, to parenting which is not. Childcare centers, even the good ones, don’t even come close as a substitute for attachment parenting. A dedicated and special nanny could approximate the role of a parent, but sooner or later the kid realizes he or she isn’t having much of a relationship with their biological parents and will be harmed, to at least come degree, by the lack.
[/quote]
I never thought I’d see attachment parenting discussed on Piggington.(confession – I was a reluctant “attachment parent”… I had a child that seemed to need/demand it even though it was outside my comfort zone. I can hang with the best of them with discussions of co-sleeping, baby-wearing, etc… even though I would never have imagined it prior to parenting… Amazing how kids change our perspectives.)
UCGal
Participant[quote=Russell]It looks like people are comparing childcare, which is easy to put a price on, to parenting which is not. Childcare centers, even the good ones, don’t even come close as a substitute for attachment parenting. A dedicated and special nanny could approximate the role of a parent, but sooner or later the kid realizes he or she isn’t having much of a relationship with their biological parents and will be harmed, to at least come degree, by the lack.
[/quote]
I never thought I’d see attachment parenting discussed on Piggington.(confession – I was a reluctant “attachment parent”… I had a child that seemed to need/demand it even though it was outside my comfort zone. I can hang with the best of them with discussions of co-sleeping, baby-wearing, etc… even though I would never have imagined it prior to parenting… Amazing how kids change our perspectives.)
UCGal
Participant[quote=Russell]It looks like people are comparing childcare, which is easy to put a price on, to parenting which is not. Childcare centers, even the good ones, don’t even come close as a substitute for attachment parenting. A dedicated and special nanny could approximate the role of a parent, but sooner or later the kid realizes he or she isn’t having much of a relationship with their biological parents and will be harmed, to at least come degree, by the lack.
[/quote]
I never thought I’d see attachment parenting discussed on Piggington.(confession – I was a reluctant “attachment parent”… I had a child that seemed to need/demand it even though it was outside my comfort zone. I can hang with the best of them with discussions of co-sleeping, baby-wearing, etc… even though I would never have imagined it prior to parenting… Amazing how kids change our perspectives.)
UCGal
Participant[quote=bob2007]UCgal,
Is there any possibility that your “crappy employer” is having a down year, and the matching was stopped to save a job or two? At least you are still employed.[/quote]
That’s what I’m hoping. We’ve been having a few down years after a few boom years… Benefits overall have taken a huge beating in the last 2-3 years… Yes, I’m happy to still have a job that pays well and I enjoy… that last part is HUGE.
UCGal
Participant[quote=bob2007]UCgal,
Is there any possibility that your “crappy employer” is having a down year, and the matching was stopped to save a job or two? At least you are still employed.[/quote]
That’s what I’m hoping. We’ve been having a few down years after a few boom years… Benefits overall have taken a huge beating in the last 2-3 years… Yes, I’m happy to still have a job that pays well and I enjoy… that last part is HUGE.
UCGal
Participant[quote=bob2007]UCgal,
Is there any possibility that your “crappy employer” is having a down year, and the matching was stopped to save a job or two? At least you are still employed.[/quote]
That’s what I’m hoping. We’ve been having a few down years after a few boom years… Benefits overall have taken a huge beating in the last 2-3 years… Yes, I’m happy to still have a job that pays well and I enjoy… that last part is HUGE.
UCGal
Participant[quote=bob2007]UCgal,
Is there any possibility that your “crappy employer” is having a down year, and the matching was stopped to save a job or two? At least you are still employed.[/quote]
That’s what I’m hoping. We’ve been having a few down years after a few boom years… Benefits overall have taken a huge beating in the last 2-3 years… Yes, I’m happy to still have a job that pays well and I enjoy… that last part is HUGE.
UCGal
Participant[quote=bob2007]UCgal,
Is there any possibility that your “crappy employer” is having a down year, and the matching was stopped to save a job or two? At least you are still employed.[/quote]
That’s what I’m hoping. We’ve been having a few down years after a few boom years… Benefits overall have taken a huge beating in the last 2-3 years… Yes, I’m happy to still have a job that pays well and I enjoy… that last part is HUGE.
UCGal
ParticipantDave – I laughed at the failed gold digger comment. I’ve got thick skin.
Coincidentally, when I was at costco tire center today I was talking to a woman with a 2 year old daughter… The wait times were long so we had a lot of time to talk. She’d adopted her daughter. She was single. She supported herself. She did this by choice.
FWIW – she was very attractive… Thin, blonde hair, very fit. I don’t see that she’d have any problem snagging a man. She might have been gay – but I didn’t get that vibe, lol.
Dave – by your own statistic 1 in 4 women in 2 income households makes more than her husband… that’s a significant number. When women have income parity I think you’ll see more couples choosing based on income and career goals to have the man stay home or work part time. The world is changing.
UCGal
ParticipantDave – I laughed at the failed gold digger comment. I’ve got thick skin.
Coincidentally, when I was at costco tire center today I was talking to a woman with a 2 year old daughter… The wait times were long so we had a lot of time to talk. She’d adopted her daughter. She was single. She supported herself. She did this by choice.
FWIW – she was very attractive… Thin, blonde hair, very fit. I don’t see that she’d have any problem snagging a man. She might have been gay – but I didn’t get that vibe, lol.
Dave – by your own statistic 1 in 4 women in 2 income households makes more than her husband… that’s a significant number. When women have income parity I think you’ll see more couples choosing based on income and career goals to have the man stay home or work part time. The world is changing.
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