[UCGal]

I offered to buy one for my husband. He declined.
He did accept the fact that I wanted a sapphire rather than a diamond (my birthstone is sapphire.) It was WAAAY cheaper because of this. (We knew we were going to get married from about date 3 or 4… Just waited a decent time to make sure.)

I would have been fine with no ring. That said – I wear my engagement ring fulltime… It’s silly sentimental. I’ve been wearing it for more than 10 years. It’s stupid, but it reminds me of our bond every time I look at it. Sappy, I know. And I’m not the sappy type.

I’m curious Dave… how old are you?
My husband was a lifelong bachelor… He was 47 when we got married. He’d never been married… never fully committed to living with anyone prior – although he’d been “virtually” living with 2 long term girlfriends prior to me. (Serially, not parallel)

I was reasonably content being single too – I was 38 when we got married – first marriage for me. I’d wanted kids – but had pretty much put that aside by the time I met my husband.

We both had comfortable, happy lives as single people prior to marriage. That said – we’re happy together… although there’s less freedom post kids. But our kids are great and we have no regrets.

Dogs can learn new tricks… You never know. LOL.

[UCGal]

I offered to buy one for my husband. He declined.
He did accept the fact that I wanted a sapphire rather than a diamond (my birthstone is sapphire.) It was WAAAY cheaper because of this. (We knew we were going to get married from about date 3 or 4… Just waited a decent time to make sure.)

I would have been fine with no ring. That said – I wear my engagement ring fulltime… It’s silly sentimental. I’ve been wearing it for more than 10 years. It’s stupid, but it reminds me of our bond every time I look at it. Sappy, I know. And I’m not the sappy type.

I’m curious Dave… how old are you?
My husband was a lifelong bachelor… He was 47 when we got married. He’d never been married… never fully committed to living with anyone prior – although he’d been “virtually” living with 2 long term girlfriends prior to me. (Serially, not parallel)

I was reasonably content being single too – I was 38 when we got married – first marriage for me. I’d wanted kids – but had pretty much put that aside by the time I met my husband.

We both had comfortable, happy lives as single people prior to marriage. That said – we’re happy together… although there’s less freedom post kids. But our kids are great and we have no regrets.

Dogs can learn new tricks… You never know. LOL.

[UCGal]

I offered to buy one for my husband. He declined.
He did accept the fact that I wanted a sapphire rather than a diamond (my birthstone is sapphire.) It was WAAAY cheaper because of this. (We knew we were going to get married from about date 3 or 4… Just waited a decent time to make sure.)

I would have been fine with no ring. That said – I wear my engagement ring fulltime… It’s silly sentimental. I’ve been wearing it for more than 10 years. It’s stupid, but it reminds me of our bond every time I look at it. Sappy, I know. And I’m not the sappy type.

I’m curious Dave… how old are you?
My husband was a lifelong bachelor… He was 47 when we got married. He’d never been married… never fully committed to living with anyone prior – although he’d been “virtually” living with 2 long term girlfriends prior to me. (Serially, not parallel)

I was reasonably content being single too – I was 38 when we got married – first marriage for me. I’d wanted kids – but had pretty much put that aside by the time I met my husband.

We both had comfortable, happy lives as single people prior to marriage. That said – we’re happy together… although there’s less freedom post kids. But our kids are great and we have no regrets.

Dogs can learn new tricks… You never know. LOL.

[UCGal]

[quote=Russell]It looks like people are comparing childcare, which is easy to put a price on, to parenting which is not. Childcare centers, even the good ones, don’t even come close as a substitute for attachment parenting. A dedicated and special nanny could approximate the role of a parent, but sooner or later the kid realizes he or she isn’t having much of a relationship with their biological parents and will be harmed, to at least come degree, by the lack.
[/quote]
I never thought I’d see attachment parenting discussed on Piggington.

(confession – I was a reluctant “attachment parent”… I had a child that seemed to need/demand it even though it was outside my comfort zone. I can hang with the best of them with discussions of co-sleeping, baby-wearing, etc… even though I would never have imagined it prior to parenting… Amazing how kids change our perspectives.)

[UCGal]

[quote=Russell]It looks like people are comparing childcare, which is easy to put a price on, to parenting which is not. Childcare centers, even the good ones, don’t even come close as a substitute for attachment parenting. A dedicated and special nanny could approximate the role of a parent, but sooner or later the kid realizes he or she isn’t having much of a relationship with their biological parents and will be harmed, to at least come degree, by the lack.
[/quote]
I never thought I’d see attachment parenting discussed on Piggington.

(confession – I was a reluctant “attachment parent”… I had a child that seemed to need/demand it even though it was outside my comfort zone. I can hang with the best of them with discussions of co-sleeping, baby-wearing, etc… even though I would never have imagined it prior to parenting… Amazing how kids change our perspectives.)

[UCGal]

[quote=Russell]It looks like people are comparing childcare, which is easy to put a price on, to parenting which is not. Childcare centers, even the good ones, don’t even come close as a substitute for attachment parenting. A dedicated and special nanny could approximate the role of a parent, but sooner or later the kid realizes he or she isn’t having much of a relationship with their biological parents and will be harmed, to at least come degree, by the lack.
[/quote]
I never thought I’d see attachment parenting discussed on Piggington.

(confession – I was a reluctant “attachment parent”… I had a child that seemed to need/demand it even though it was outside my comfort zone. I can hang with the best of them with discussions of co-sleeping, baby-wearing, etc… even though I would never have imagined it prior to parenting… Amazing how kids change our perspectives.)

[UCGal]

[quote=Russell]It looks like people are comparing childcare, which is easy to put a price on, to parenting which is not. Childcare centers, even the good ones, don’t even come close as a substitute for attachment parenting. A dedicated and special nanny could approximate the role of a parent, but sooner or later the kid realizes he or she isn’t having much of a relationship with their biological parents and will be harmed, to at least come degree, by the lack.
[/quote]
I never thought I’d see attachment parenting discussed on Piggington.

(confession – I was a reluctant “attachment parent”… I had a child that seemed to need/demand it even though it was outside my comfort zone. I can hang with the best of them with discussions of co-sleeping, baby-wearing, etc… even though I would never have imagined it prior to parenting… Amazing how kids change our perspectives.)

[UCGal]

[quote=Russell]It looks like people are comparing childcare, which is easy to put a price on, to parenting which is not. Childcare centers, even the good ones, don’t even come close as a substitute for attachment parenting. A dedicated and special nanny could approximate the role of a parent, but sooner or later the kid realizes he or she isn’t having much of a relationship with their biological parents and will be harmed, to at least come degree, by the lack.
[/quote]
I never thought I’d see attachment parenting discussed on Piggington.

(confession – I was a reluctant “attachment parent”… I had a child that seemed to need/demand it even though it was outside my comfort zone. I can hang with the best of them with discussions of co-sleeping, baby-wearing, etc… even though I would never have imagined it prior to parenting… Amazing how kids change our perspectives.)

[UCGal]

[quote=bob2007]UCgal,

Is there any possibility that your “crappy employer” is having a down year, and the matching was stopped to save a job or two? At least you are still employed.[/quote]

That’s what I’m hoping. We’ve been having a few down years after a few boom years… Benefits overall have taken a huge beating in the last 2-3 years… Yes, I’m happy to still have a job that pays well and I enjoy… that last part is HUGE.

[UCGal]

[quote=bob2007]UCgal,

Is there any possibility that your “crappy employer” is having a down year, and the matching was stopped to save a job or two? At least you are still employed.[/quote]

That’s what I’m hoping. We’ve been having a few down years after a few boom years… Benefits overall have taken a huge beating in the last 2-3 years… Yes, I’m happy to still have a job that pays well and I enjoy… that last part is HUGE.

[UCGal]

[quote=bob2007]UCgal,

Is there any possibility that your “crappy employer” is having a down year, and the matching was stopped to save a job or two? At least you are still employed.[/quote]

That’s what I’m hoping. We’ve been having a few down years after a few boom years… Benefits overall have taken a huge beating in the last 2-3 years… Yes, I’m happy to still have a job that pays well and I enjoy… that last part is HUGE.

[UCGal]

[quote=bob2007]UCgal,

Is there any possibility that your “crappy employer” is having a down year, and the matching was stopped to save a job or two? At least you are still employed.[/quote]

That’s what I’m hoping. We’ve been having a few down years after a few boom years… Benefits overall have taken a huge beating in the last 2-3 years… Yes, I’m happy to still have a job that pays well and I enjoy… that last part is HUGE.

[UCGal]

[quote=bob2007]UCgal,

Is there any possibility that your “crappy employer” is having a down year, and the matching was stopped to save a job or two? At least you are still employed.[/quote]

That’s what I’m hoping. We’ve been having a few down years after a few boom years… Benefits overall have taken a huge beating in the last 2-3 years… Yes, I’m happy to still have a job that pays well and I enjoy… that last part is HUGE.

[UCGal]

Dave – I laughed at the failed gold digger comment. I’ve got thick skin.

Coincidentally, when I was at costco tire center today I was talking to a woman with a 2 year old daughter… The wait times were long so we had a lot of time to talk. She’d adopted her daughter. She was single. She supported herself. She did this by choice.

FWIW – she was very attractive… Thin, blonde hair, very fit. I don’t see that she’d have any problem snagging a man. She might have been gay – but I didn’t get that vibe, lol.

Dave – by your own statistic 1 in 4 women in 2 income households makes more than her husband… that’s a significant number. When women have income parity I think you’ll see more couples choosing based on income and career goals to have the man stay home or work part time. The world is changing.

[UCGal]

Dave – I laughed at the failed gold digger comment. I’ve got thick skin.

Coincidentally, when I was at costco tire center today I was talking to a woman with a 2 year old daughter… The wait times were long so we had a lot of time to talk. She’d adopted her daughter. She was single. She supported herself. She did this by choice.

FWIW – she was very attractive… Thin, blonde hair, very fit. I don’t see that she’d have any problem snagging a man. She might have been gay – but I didn’t get that vibe, lol.

Dave – by your own statistic 1 in 4 women in 2 income households makes more than her husband… that’s a significant number. When women have income parity I think you’ll see more couples choosing based on income and career goals to have the man stay home or work part time. The world is changing.

[Author]

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