[an]

Ron Paul, but I doubt he will win.

To add on to TG’s platform, legalize most drugs, ship all criminals to an island like Australia, free schooling (private and public), and most important of all eliminate income tax.

[an]

Ron Paul, but I doubt he will win.

To add on to TG’s platform, legalize most drugs, ship all criminals to an island like Australia, free schooling (private and public), and most important of all eliminate income tax.

[an]

[quote=eavesdropper]
This has been pointed out in several of the posts…in fact, I think the blame goes more to the enabler. A child (even an adult one) cannot act any differently than the way he’s been taught. If he/she has never been taught basic life skills or made to bear personal responsibility for wrongdoing (in essence, been taught that mom and dad are their personal servants, and they can do anything they want without personal repercussions), how can they be expected to act otherwise?

However, this begs the question: If you have realized that you’ve made serious mistakes and made genuine efforts to undo the damage your “parenting” (or lack thereof) has done, are you “helping” them by allowing them to continue using and abusing you, or simply continuing to enable their escalating deviant behavior?
[/quote]
If you think there’s equal blame for the enabler, then the question becomes, what type of person is the enabler. Is he/she own up to their mistake and try to fix it at any cost or do they just say f* it, I’ve tried hard enough to fix it and the problem is not going away so I’ll throw in the tower and kick the kid out. If you’re an enabler parent for 18 years, at the very least, I would think you should spend the next 18 years trying to fix the problem you cause in the 1st 18 years before you can truly say you tried hard enough. Behavior takes a long time to change.

[an]

[quote=eavesdropper]
This has been pointed out in several of the posts…in fact, I think the blame goes more to the enabler. A child (even an adult one) cannot act any differently than the way he’s been taught. If he/she has never been taught basic life skills or made to bear personal responsibility for wrongdoing (in essence, been taught that mom and dad are their personal servants, and they can do anything they want without personal repercussions), how can they be expected to act otherwise?

However, this begs the question: If you have realized that you’ve made serious mistakes and made genuine efforts to undo the damage your “parenting” (or lack thereof) has done, are you “helping” them by allowing them to continue using and abusing you, or simply continuing to enable their escalating deviant behavior?
[/quote]
If you think there’s equal blame for the enabler, then the question becomes, what type of person is the enabler. Is he/she own up to their mistake and try to fix it at any cost or do they just say f* it, I’ve tried hard enough to fix it and the problem is not going away so I’ll throw in the tower and kick the kid out. If you’re an enabler parent for 18 years, at the very least, I would think you should spend the next 18 years trying to fix the problem you cause in the 1st 18 years before you can truly say you tried hard enough. Behavior takes a long time to change.

[an]

[quote=eavesdropper]
This has been pointed out in several of the posts…in fact, I think the blame goes more to the enabler. A child (even an adult one) cannot act any differently than the way he’s been taught. If he/she has never been taught basic life skills or made to bear personal responsibility for wrongdoing (in essence, been taught that mom and dad are their personal servants, and they can do anything they want without personal repercussions), how can they be expected to act otherwise?

However, this begs the question: If you have realized that you’ve made serious mistakes and made genuine efforts to undo the damage your “parenting” (or lack thereof) has done, are you “helping” them by allowing them to continue using and abusing you, or simply continuing to enable their escalating deviant behavior?
[/quote]
If you think there’s equal blame for the enabler, then the question becomes, what type of person is the enabler. Is he/she own up to their mistake and try to fix it at any cost or do they just say f* it, I’ve tried hard enough to fix it and the problem is not going away so I’ll throw in the tower and kick the kid out. If you’re an enabler parent for 18 years, at the very least, I would think you should spend the next 18 years trying to fix the problem you cause in the 1st 18 years before you can truly say you tried hard enough. Behavior takes a long time to change.

[an]

[quote=eavesdropper]
This has been pointed out in several of the posts…in fact, I think the blame goes more to the enabler. A child (even an adult one) cannot act any differently than the way he’s been taught. If he/she has never been taught basic life skills or made to bear personal responsibility for wrongdoing (in essence, been taught that mom and dad are their personal servants, and they can do anything they want without personal repercussions), how can they be expected to act otherwise?

However, this begs the question: If you have realized that you’ve made serious mistakes and made genuine efforts to undo the damage your “parenting” (or lack thereof) has done, are you “helping” them by allowing them to continue using and abusing you, or simply continuing to enable their escalating deviant behavior?
[/quote]
If you think there’s equal blame for the enabler, then the question becomes, what type of person is the enabler. Is he/she own up to their mistake and try to fix it at any cost or do they just say f* it, I’ve tried hard enough to fix it and the problem is not going away so I’ll throw in the tower and kick the kid out. If you’re an enabler parent for 18 years, at the very least, I would think you should spend the next 18 years trying to fix the problem you cause in the 1st 18 years before you can truly say you tried hard enough. Behavior takes a long time to change.

[an]

[quote=eavesdropper]
This has been pointed out in several of the posts…in fact, I think the blame goes more to the enabler. A child (even an adult one) cannot act any differently than the way he’s been taught. If he/she has never been taught basic life skills or made to bear personal responsibility for wrongdoing (in essence, been taught that mom and dad are their personal servants, and they can do anything they want without personal repercussions), how can they be expected to act otherwise?

However, this begs the question: If you have realized that you’ve made serious mistakes and made genuine efforts to undo the damage your “parenting” (or lack thereof) has done, are you “helping” them by allowing them to continue using and abusing you, or simply continuing to enable their escalating deviant behavior?
[/quote]
If you think there’s equal blame for the enabler, then the question becomes, what type of person is the enabler. Is he/she own up to their mistake and try to fix it at any cost or do they just say f* it, I’ve tried hard enough to fix it and the problem is not going away so I’ll throw in the tower and kick the kid out. If you’re an enabler parent for 18 years, at the very least, I would think you should spend the next 18 years trying to fix the problem you cause in the 1st 18 years before you can truly say you tried hard enough. Behavior takes a long time to change.

[an]

Ladies, I totally agree that if the child is abusive and the parents are affraid for their safety, the parents should kick the kids out of the house. On the other hand, if child are deadbeats and the parents are enabling that, the blame goes as much to the enabler as the deadbeat. If I screwed up as a parent and my children become deadbeat, then it’s my responsibility as a parent to fix that problem.

I’m of the mind that family who stick together and help each other will be better off than those who thinks everyone for themselves. My parents did everything they could for me (pay for my tuition, let me live at home for as long as I want, etc), and in return, now that I’m independent, I will be there to support them anytime they need/want me to. They would never have kick me out of the house and I will never put them in a home when it’s time for me to take care of my parents in return. I’m doing the same thing to my kids as my parents did to me. Just because my parents paid everything for me doesn’t make me lazy and a deadbeat. I help out around the house when I was little and start working when I was 15 and never stopped working since. But because they helped me out financially, it sure made my life a lot easier. I don’t have to worry about student loans. I can save a lot more than I would have if I have a pile of student loans to worry about. I will take that advantage my parents gave me to take it to the next level and pass on that advantage to my kids.

[an]

Ladies, I totally agree that if the child is abusive and the parents are affraid for their safety, the parents should kick the kids out of the house. On the other hand, if child are deadbeats and the parents are enabling that, the blame goes as much to the enabler as the deadbeat. If I screwed up as a parent and my children become deadbeat, then it’s my responsibility as a parent to fix that problem.

I’m of the mind that family who stick together and help each other will be better off than those who thinks everyone for themselves. My parents did everything they could for me (pay for my tuition, let me live at home for as long as I want, etc), and in return, now that I’m independent, I will be there to support them anytime they need/want me to. They would never have kick me out of the house and I will never put them in a home when it’s time for me to take care of my parents in return. I’m doing the same thing to my kids as my parents did to me. Just because my parents paid everything for me doesn’t make me lazy and a deadbeat. I help out around the house when I was little and start working when I was 15 and never stopped working since. But because they helped me out financially, it sure made my life a lot easier. I don’t have to worry about student loans. I can save a lot more than I would have if I have a pile of student loans to worry about. I will take that advantage my parents gave me to take it to the next level and pass on that advantage to my kids.

[an]

Ladies, I totally agree that if the child is abusive and the parents are affraid for their safety, the parents should kick the kids out of the house. On the other hand, if child are deadbeats and the parents are enabling that, the blame goes as much to the enabler as the deadbeat. If I screwed up as a parent and my children become deadbeat, then it’s my responsibility as a parent to fix that problem.

I’m of the mind that family who stick together and help each other will be better off than those who thinks everyone for themselves. My parents did everything they could for me (pay for my tuition, let me live at home for as long as I want, etc), and in return, now that I’m independent, I will be there to support them anytime they need/want me to. They would never have kick me out of the house and I will never put them in a home when it’s time for me to take care of my parents in return. I’m doing the same thing to my kids as my parents did to me. Just because my parents paid everything for me doesn’t make me lazy and a deadbeat. I help out around the house when I was little and start working when I was 15 and never stopped working since. But because they helped me out financially, it sure made my life a lot easier. I don’t have to worry about student loans. I can save a lot more than I would have if I have a pile of student loans to worry about. I will take that advantage my parents gave me to take it to the next level and pass on that advantage to my kids.

[an]

Ladies, I totally agree that if the child is abusive and the parents are affraid for their safety, the parents should kick the kids out of the house. On the other hand, if child are deadbeats and the parents are enabling that, the blame goes as much to the enabler as the deadbeat. If I screwed up as a parent and my children become deadbeat, then it’s my responsibility as a parent to fix that problem.

I’m of the mind that family who stick together and help each other will be better off than those who thinks everyone for themselves. My parents did everything they could for me (pay for my tuition, let me live at home for as long as I want, etc), and in return, now that I’m independent, I will be there to support them anytime they need/want me to. They would never have kick me out of the house and I will never put them in a home when it’s time for me to take care of my parents in return. I’m doing the same thing to my kids as my parents did to me. Just because my parents paid everything for me doesn’t make me lazy and a deadbeat. I help out around the house when I was little and start working when I was 15 and never stopped working since. But because they helped me out financially, it sure made my life a lot easier. I don’t have to worry about student loans. I can save a lot more than I would have if I have a pile of student loans to worry about. I will take that advantage my parents gave me to take it to the next level and pass on that advantage to my kids.

[an]

Ladies, I totally agree that if the child is abusive and the parents are affraid for their safety, the parents should kick the kids out of the house. On the other hand, if child are deadbeats and the parents are enabling that, the blame goes as much to the enabler as the deadbeat. If I screwed up as a parent and my children become deadbeat, then it’s my responsibility as a parent to fix that problem.

I’m of the mind that family who stick together and help each other will be better off than those who thinks everyone for themselves. My parents did everything they could for me (pay for my tuition, let me live at home for as long as I want, etc), and in return, now that I’m independent, I will be there to support them anytime they need/want me to. They would never have kick me out of the house and I will never put them in a home when it’s time for me to take care of my parents in return. I’m doing the same thing to my kids as my parents did to me. Just because my parents paid everything for me doesn’t make me lazy and a deadbeat. I help out around the house when I was little and start working when I was 15 and never stopped working since. But because they helped me out financially, it sure made my life a lot easier. I don’t have to worry about student loans. I can save a lot more than I would have if I have a pile of student loans to worry about. I will take that advantage my parents gave me to take it to the next level and pass on that advantage to my kids.

[an]

Thanks for the background of the story. So in essence, she didn’t get kick out of the house. I didn’t know about this story and the OP said she was kicked out.

You still didn’t really answer my question. Would you kick out your kids if they’re deadbeat? I know plenty of people who live with their parents until they get married and are not deadbeats. I also know plenty of people who got their college education covered by their parents. They’re not deadbeats either and they’re still quite close to their parents. Some even move back in with their parents till they got married to save for a house. So, I don’t see anything wrong with parents choosing to support their kids when they need help. Just like kids choosing to support their parents when they need help in their old age.

[an]

Thanks for the background of the story. So in essence, she didn’t get kick out of the house. I didn’t know about this story and the OP said she was kicked out.

You still didn’t really answer my question. Would you kick out your kids if they’re deadbeat? I know plenty of people who live with their parents until they get married and are not deadbeats. I also know plenty of people who got their college education covered by their parents. They’re not deadbeats either and they’re still quite close to their parents. Some even move back in with their parents till they got married to save for a house. So, I don’t see anything wrong with parents choosing to support their kids when they need help. Just like kids choosing to support their parents when they need help in their old age.

[an]

Thanks for the background of the story. So in essence, she didn’t get kick out of the house. I didn’t know about this story and the OP said she was kicked out.

You still didn’t really answer my question. Would you kick out your kids if they’re deadbeat? I know plenty of people who live with their parents until they get married and are not deadbeats. I also know plenty of people who got their college education covered by their parents. They’re not deadbeats either and they’re still quite close to their parents. Some even move back in with their parents till they got married to save for a house. So, I don’t see anything wrong with parents choosing to support their kids when they need help. Just like kids choosing to support their parents when they need help in their old age.

[Author]

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