OT: How much baggage will you accept?

[NotCranky]

In a marriage system like our, mostly choice based, I think the issue of marrying up or down is very rare. There may be more money or apparent class issues, better looks on one side, better social skills or an imbalance of any other factor but in the end water seeks on level even when many characteristics of f the two confluent streams are different. I can think of so many cases where these issues can be seen from the outside , but if you get closer ,think about it, you understand where the balance comes in.

There are better and worse matches in marriage, but the individuals aren’t much better or worse one form the other.

[scaredyclassic]

[quote=Blogstar]In a marriage system like our, mostly choice based, I think the issue of marrying up or down is very rare. There may be more money or apparent class issues, better looks on one side, better social skills or an imbalance of any other factor but in the end water seeks on level even when many characteristics of f the two confluent streams are different. I can think of so many cases where these issues can be seen from the outside , but if you get closer ,think about it, you understand where the balance comes in.

There are better and worse matches in marriage, but the individuals aren’t much better or worse one form the other.[/quote]

I’m pretty sure my wife would say you’re nuts and I scored.

[NotCranky]

[quote=scaredyclassic][quote=Blogstar]In a marriage system like our, mostly choice based, I think the issue of marrying up or down is very rare. There may be more money or apparent class issues, better looks on one side, better social skills or an imbalance of any other factor but in the end water seeks on level even when many characteristics of f the two confluent streams are different. I can think of so many cases where these issues can be seen from the outside , but if you get closer ,think about it, you understand where the balance comes in.

There are better and worse matches in marriage, but the individuals aren’t much better or worse one form the other.[/quote]

I’m pretty sure my wife would say you’re nuts and I scored.[/quote]
I would say your wife would be wrong. So is her family.

[NotCranky]

If you are at all sincere about it, you should never marry someone who doesn’t believe in the water seeks it’s own level idea. Even if they think they are marrying up, that silly notion is only going to last for so long.

[kev374]

[quote=Blogstar]If you are at all sincere about it, you should never marry someone who doesn’t believe in the water seeks it’s own level idea. Even if they think they are marrying up, that silly notion is only going to last for so long.[/quote]

What exactly is the definition of “your level” though… is it money, looks, education, something else? This is highly subjective depending on what exactly what each individual values the most in life.

[joec]

[quote=scaredyclassic]

I’m pretty sure my wife would say you’re nuts and I scored.[/quote]

Aren’t you a fairly successful lawyer? I think women, more than men, (not always, but is a greater concern for them…at least for people over 40+) won’t marry men who are lazy/jobless/losers…
or at least financial ability is a greater concern.

Men, they like to marry attractive women.

Sometimes though, when a millionaire isn’t enough, you need to find a Billionaire like this pretty girl:
http://au.ibtimes.com/articles/562937/20140818/miranda-kerr-pregnant-james-packer-baby-dating.htm

[NotCranky]

[quote=kev374][quote=Blogstar]If you are at all sincere about it, you should never marry someone who doesn’t believe in the water seeks it’s own level idea. Even if they think they are marrying up, that silly notion is only going to last for so long.[/quote]

What exactly is the definition of “your level” though… is it money, looks, education, something else? This is highly subjective depending on what exactly what each individual values the most in life.[/quote]

Sum total = same level, that’s the point . All the other things are just single points …not so relevant on their own , good for ego trips but they don’t build very good cases against water seeks it’s own level.

Just move on , don’t make a case against your prior girlfriend especially to other women. I personally could care less what most “Facebook friends “really think…that seem rather immature to worry about it.
Your friends don’t care what the hell happened between you and this woman and your enemies won’t believe you.

[scaredyclassic]

[quote=Blogstar][quote=kev374][quote=Blogstar]If you are at all sincere about it, you should never marry someone who doesn’t believe in the water seeks it’s own level idea. Even if they think they are marrying up, that silly notion is only going to last for so long.[/quote]

What exactly is the definition of “your level” though… is it money, looks, education, something else? This is highly subjective depending on what exactly what each individual values the most in life.[/quote]

Sum total = same level, that’s the point . All the other things are just single points …not so relevant on their own , good for ego trips but they don’t build very good cases against water seeks it’s own level.

Just move on , don’t make a case against your prior girlfriend especially to other women. I personally could care less what most “Facebook friends “really think…that seem rather immature to worry about it.
Your friends don’t care what the hell happened between you and this woman and your enemies won’t believe you.[/quote]

There was a great experiment involving rating different men and wmen on attractiveness. They each then post thieir average number rating on their head and then paired up in a room with lots of people not knowing their own number. I can’t remember all the parameters but everyone paired up w someone close to their rating. It had some game element where they had to select quickly.

Funny but true.

Yeah on sum I’m a 7.2 and my wife is also strangely a 7.2 total overall!!!

I used to be a 6.7 when I was younger. My wife was a 7.5 but we met in the middle later in life

[CA renter]

[quote=Blogstar][quote=kev374][quote=Blogstar]If you are at all sincere about it, you should never marry someone who doesn’t believe in the water seeks it’s own level idea. Even if they think they are marrying up, that silly notion is only going to last for so long.[/quote]

What exactly is the definition of “your level” though… is it money, looks, education, something else? This is highly subjective depending on what exactly what each individual values the most in life.[/quote]

Sum total = same level, that’s the point . All the other things are just single points …not so relevant on their own , good for ego trips but they don’t build very good cases against water seeks it’s own level.

Just move on , don’t make a case against your prior girlfriend especially to other women. I personally could care less what most “Facebook friends “really think…that seem rather immature to worry about it.
Your friends don’t care what the hell happened between you and this woman and your enemies won’t believe you.[/quote]

Totally agree with you, Russ. Most couples are fairly balanced, though it might not be very apparent to those on the outside.

[NotCranky]

If you age better than your spouse or something like that, maybe make a lot more money, you have to even things out …quit taking out the trash or something like that.

[scaredyclassic]

Fair is fair.

Perhaps I can set up a human appraisal business to help spouses see their true number to resolve these matters.

[NotCranky]

[quote=scaredyclassic]Fair is fair.

Perhaps I can set up a human appraisal business to help spouses see their true number to resolve these matters.[/quote]

That’s a good idea…they need the help, some people are stubborn and can’t figure it out, the divorce rate would go down.

[FlyerInHi]

That’s kind of what I mentioned however you want to define “lowbrow” vs. “highbrow”. It’s often a matter of social economics, but not always.

Kev seems like an up-and-coming professional. He doesn’t need to get dragged down by an emotional ball, from a bad family, who doesn’t have any concept of what is appropriate. He should not even consider engaging in her emotional games.

If you’re an 8, you don’t want to marry a 4. But if you did, the whole becomes a 6. The 4 improved 50% whereas the 8 was dragged down 25%. The relationship clearly was a better return on investment for the 4.

Maybe people should only marry within 1 point.

[scaredyclassic]

Trends matter so you need an appraiser who is really up to date.

Nerds like me are trendier now than 25 yrs. Ago but it’s not worth much. Might take me from a previous 6.7 to maybe 6.82. Other trends can have bigger impacts.

[scaredyclassic]

Wait maybe this could be a real business. You get an actual verifiable number u can use as a quasi reference on dating sites.

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