I’ll echo the sentiments of some of the others and add my own insights.
I don’t think you were out of line with wanting a “nice date”. As others have pointed out, some additional clarification was probably necessary. 5 – 7 years ago I was on the dating scence pretty frequently and ran into women who exhibited some of the same skittish qualities, and well beyond sometimes, so I don’t think this is exclusive to men.
When I was dating back then, I never did an expensive date until the 2nd or 3rd date when I felt there was some chemistry there. Even then, it was a place of my choosing. The way I looked at it, was that if there was a nice restaurant that had not been to before or really enjoyed, then why not take some company and share that experience. That being said, I wasn’t buying cristal and lobster. I think the most I ever spent, this was back in Chicago, was $150 for dinner at a Brazilian Churrascaria called Fogo de Chao. My date must have been suitably impressed because got married a year later and just had our first born son two weeks ago 😉