I have to say I agree with those who have expressed it seems there may be something much deeper going on here, even though it may not appear so at this moment in time.

My wife and I, our kids, and extended family grew up in SoCal with the same strong family ties the OP mentioned having on the “other coast” and I can’t even imagine what it would have been like to leave all that. In our case, it just so happened our large family was all out here, and, for the most part, have stayed out here.

Hopefully, the “internal” truth of this matter will be revealed in one way or the other, and then the “external” issues should naturally fall into place.