I would agree that cutting off contact as much as possible is the healthiest thing to do. Before I got married and had kids my life was much different. I played in 2 softball leagues, 2 roller hockey leagues, and a basketball league. Any other free time was spent at the beach playing volleyball. I also threw on my blades and did laps around the boardwalk down at mission beach. Any other free time was spent mountain biking. You live in perhaps the best climate in the entire country so I advise you to take control and enjoy it. It is not expensive to do alot of these things. There is also an organization called VAVI that has created social/recreational leagues from conventional sports like the ones I mentioned to things like dodgeball and other funky stuff. These leagues are also CO-ED so maybe you can meet a new sweetie there. I don’t drink so I was never into the bar scene so these sorts of things may be a bit more appealing to you.

The key is definitely occupation an social interaction. You are never going to escape the pain. It will always be there. The key is to acknowledge it but don’t let it control your daily life. The second key is to limit your exposure to it. So the more you just “hang out as friends” with your ex, the more you will hurt.

Believe it or not, being single is probably the best time to improve yourself and do things that you never will have time to do when you are not single anymore. Go learn karate, read a book, go out and slut around, or go learn how to play the drums… just do stuff! I know it is hard not to get wrapped up in what you used to have, or how you can change it or how you would or should have changed it…you can move on and better yourself or you can try to fix something that didn’t work before. You have an opportunity but I know it is hard to motivate to take advantage of it.