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UCGal
Participant[quote=zzz]May I ask about your dynamics? Are you both communicators? Are you both fairly easy going and agreeable? Is one of you more of the leader and the other a follower and happy with it? Are you both Type A? Just trying to get some insight.[/quote]
I would attribute it to two factors. We were older when we met/married. We both had owned our own homes for years – so we were both used to cooking/cleaning/yardwork/fixing stuff. Probably because of that we both have an attitude of looking around to see what needs doing – and doing it.
Because we were older (I was in my late 30’s he was in his late 40’s), neither of us had expectations of “changing” or “fixing” the other one… since we were both fairly set in our ways. WYSIWYG. That makes a huge difference in how we communicate – we knew the partner we were getting when we got married.
I wouldn’t say were big time communicators. But we are on the same page. Neither of us is big on the need to talk about problems. The “honey, we need to talk….” thing doesn’t happen a lot in our house.
I wouldn’t say either of us are type A, either. We are solid/stable/worker-bee types. Pretty boring.
And I wouldn’t say either of us is the leader. We just agree on all of the big stuff, and compromise on the little stuff. If one person feels stronger about something, the other usually gives in.
We both work in professional jobs (engineer and architect). We both tend to be problem solvers. So far, we haven’t had the career struggle since we’ve both taken the career/income hits when we chose to have kids.
I guess this is all fancy talk for saying I found a compatable person… I got lucky.
Participant[quote=zzz]May I ask about your dynamics? Are you both communicators? Are you both fairly easy going and agreeable? Is one of you more of the leader and the other a follower and happy with it? Are you both Type A? Just trying to get some insight.[/quote]
I would attribute it to two factors. We were older when we met/married. We both had owned our own homes for years – so we were both used to cooking/cleaning/yardwork/fixing stuff. Probably because of that we both have an attitude of looking around to see what needs doing – and doing it.
Because we were older (I was in my late 30’s he was in his late 40’s), neither of us had expectations of “changing” or “fixing” the other one… since we were both fairly set in our ways. WYSIWYG. That makes a huge difference in how we communicate – we knew the partner we were getting when we got married.
I wouldn’t say were big time communicators. But we are on the same page. Neither of us is big on the need to talk about problems. The “honey, we need to talk….” thing doesn’t happen a lot in our house.
I wouldn’t say either of us are type A, either. We are solid/stable/worker-bee types. Pretty boring.
And I wouldn’t say either of us is the leader. We just agree on all of the big stuff, and compromise on the little stuff. If one person feels stronger about something, the other usually gives in.
We both work in professional jobs (engineer and architect). We both tend to be problem solvers. So far, we haven’t had the career struggle since we’ve both taken the career/income hits when we chose to have kids.
I guess this is all fancy talk for saying I found a compatable person… I got lucky.
Participantzzz –
I am just very glad there are exceptions to your rule. Shared household duties in our house AND harmony. It helps that we are both decent cooks and both can handle power tools and a vacuum.Participantzzz –
I am just very glad there are exceptions to your rule. Shared household duties in our house AND harmony. It helps that we are both decent cooks and both can handle power tools and a vacuum.Participantzzz –
I am just very glad there are exceptions to your rule. Shared household duties in our house AND harmony. It helps that we are both decent cooks and both can handle power tools and a vacuum.Participantzzz –
I am just very glad there are exceptions to your rule. Shared household duties in our house AND harmony. It helps that we are both decent cooks and both can handle power tools and a vacuum.Participantzzz –
I am just very glad there are exceptions to your rule. Shared household duties in our house AND harmony. It helps that we are both decent cooks and both can handle power tools and a vacuum.Participant[quote=sdduuuude][quote=Colombo]An Engineer making over 100K in salary should know the difference between “loose” and “lose”.
Just saying.[/quote]
You don’t hang out with engineers much, do you ?[/quote]
LMAO – isn’t that the truth!Participant[quote=sdduuuude][quote=Colombo]An Engineer making over 100K in salary should know the difference between “loose” and “lose”.
Just saying.[/quote]
You don’t hang out with engineers much, do you ?[/quote]
LMAO – isn’t that the truth!Participant[quote=sdduuuude][quote=Colombo]An Engineer making over 100K in salary should know the difference between “loose” and “lose”.
Just saying.[/quote]
You don’t hang out with engineers much, do you ?[/quote]
LMAO – isn’t that the truth!Participant[quote=sdduuuude][quote=Colombo]An Engineer making over 100K in salary should know the difference between “loose” and “lose”.
Just saying.[/quote]
You don’t hang out with engineers much, do you ?[/quote]
LMAO – isn’t that the truth!Participant[quote=sdduuuude][quote=Colombo]An Engineer making over 100K in salary should know the difference between “loose” and “lose”.
Just saying.[/quote]
You don’t hang out with engineers much, do you ?[/quote]
LMAO – isn’t that the truth!ParticipantI would disagree with the military not buying houses. I live near Miramar – there are a LOT of homes owned (not rented) by officers in my ‘hood. I can think of 4 families within one block.
does it make financial sense for them… that’s a whole ‘nuther thing. The transaction costs of buying/selling every few years must be a killer… But military folks are buying.
And it’s not just my ‘hood. I have coworkers who are retired military, married to active duty military who own homes.
On a related point to your point… if seniors/retired folks have such low income, how are they going to pay their mortgages… The trend is to serially refi at 30 years… I know so many people that will have significant mortgage payments well into retirement. Either they know their retirement income (401k, SS, if they’re lucky – pension) will be large enough – or they are screwed.
ParticipantI would disagree with the military not buying houses. I live near Miramar – there are a LOT of homes owned (not rented) by officers in my ‘hood. I can think of 4 families within one block.
does it make financial sense for them… that’s a whole ‘nuther thing. The transaction costs of buying/selling every few years must be a killer… But military folks are buying.
And it’s not just my ‘hood. I have coworkers who are retired military, married to active duty military who own homes.
On a related point to your point… if seniors/retired folks have such low income, how are they going to pay their mortgages… The trend is to serially refi at 30 years… I know so many people that will have significant mortgage payments well into retirement. Either they know their retirement income (401k, SS, if they’re lucky – pension) will be large enough – or they are screwed.
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