[spdrun]

Brits have gone soft. Before the 60ies, the Islamoscum would have had three weeks to make their peace with Allah, followed by an appointment with the public hangman.

[spdrun]

Spoken like a true bachelor with no kids (I’m assuming.. LOL). Yeah, so if you are a single guy with no kids/family then obviously you wouldn’t want an SUV. But here’s the rub…… When you have 2 kids already and you are planning on having another in the next year and you don’t want a mini-van… you have very few alternatives.

I’m getting a vasectomy after the second little shitting, squealing, pissing pink grub. Even if I have to do it all by my lonesome with a rusty razor blade and an old Singer sewing machine.

[spdrun]

Totally understood, actually:

Frankly, I *wish* that GM would release the police Caprice with a diesel engine (rather than a gas-guzzling piggie V-8) when it comes out for civilian use in 2014. I’d love a 30+ mpg “land barge” — I drove a Caprice wagon in college before some fool stole it and exported it to Saudi Arabia(*), and it had awesome carrying capacity, got high-mid 20s highway MPG, and handled better than any SUV.

(*) – no joke.

[spdrun]

Had he hit you, you’d have been just as dead in an SUV. At least you could jump the Quaalude out of the way without rolling it over. G-d may have been with you that you didn’t have an SUV that day.

If I were buying new, my poison of choice these days would probably be a small wagon. Fit, Prius, Jetta, or whatever else happens to be out there.

[spdrun]

That’s why overweight SUVs lugging around 5500 lb of pigfat and with 400 hp so a soccer mooooomy can plaster her ill-behaved sprogs to the leather seats by pressing the loud pedal are impractical to own. Yep, the 5500 lb is CURB weight, not GVWR. 1500lb heavier than your average 70s or 80s American land barge. Fail.

Q7? Just call it the Audi Suburban, Canyonero, or Power Wagon. Every time I see one of those things on the road, and think back to when Audi made light, innovative, fun-to-drive cars, I want to burst into tears.

[spdrun]

I’d take a jeep or dunebuggy for hard-core off roading, but as a daily driver, no thx.

[spdrun]

Me, I *LOATHE!* SUVs and their tank-like feeling. Feels tippy and awkward to drive to me.

[spdrun]

Bg – haha.

All you fraidy cats can bite me. Just took a 2000 mi road trip in a Fiat 500!

[spdrun]

No Prius wagon on your short list?

[spdrun]

I suspect you can always find SOMEONE to give you a portfolio loan even if you don’t qualify for normal financing. I can’t speak to SD, but one lender in NY/NJ does 65% ltv stated income in 2013, cash out or purchase. Stated income can be no more than 4x of funds available after closing. This is for owner occupied sfr, duplex, or condo.

Another lender does non-occupied, treated as a commercial mortgage as I described earlier.

Besides, $42,750/yr guaranteed income ain’t bad. You can always find some job that nets an additional $30-40k/yr, rent the house, and move into smaller digs. 2-3 bedroom apt for $1500/mo, let’s say.

[spdrun]

As far as qualifying …

There’s a local (very local, literally one 20′ wide store front) bank in my hometown that will loan on 1-4 unit investment property AS IF it were a 5+ unit or commercial property. You’ll pay 0.5% more for it, but it’s a lot easier to qualify since it’s mainly based on your credit and the building’s income, not your income. Rate fixed for 10 years, 20-25% down.

Guessing they’re keeping those loans on the books, not selling to the GSE’s 🙂

Once you’re paid off on your home, you can always still have a line of credit against it to 70-75% of value, that’s then convertible into a fixed-rate loan.

[spdrun]

First of all, property is still a good investment in many areas. A few West Coast cities and DC with mini-bubbles are the exception not the norm. Secondly, if paying off early helps you to qualify for financing on a “second home” that’s a rental, I say have at it.

Lastly, having a $400,000 home that you only pay taxes, utilities and repair costs, can rent out at 7-8% profit, and quit your job to bum around Thailand on the proceeds would be niiiiiice. Basically, being in the position to scream “FUCK YOU, I’M OUTTA HERE FOR A YEAR, TRY AND STOP ME, YOU DUMB DONKEY-PENIS!!!” in your boss’s face is a beautiful thing.

[spdrun]

There’s a lot of inventory in limbo in CA, I suspect. Currently still underwater, but banks are very slow to foreclose or force the owner to short-sell because of the homeowners’ bill of rights.

[spdrun]

… or perhaps capital flight from Europe to US stocks, since they’re seen as the safest game in town at the moment. It would be interesting to see what would happen if another Cyprus happens and the Eurozone imposes capital controls.

As far as the Fed, their policies seem to be (thankfully) losing effect. Note that the Dow actually dropped another 50+ points (after the initial drop after ADP) after Ben opened his bearded yap-hole on Wednesday.

Though if we find out that Ben isn’t seeking another term for “health reasons”, then it might finally have the desired correcting effect on the markets.

[spdrun]

Are there any state/local laws specifying minimum square footage or rooms per occupant?

[Author]

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