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njtosd
Participant[quote=Blogstar][quote=njtosd][quote=scaredyclassic]Because a male is never certain of paternity he must be in a constant state of uncertainty. Perhaps, therefore, “what’s up little bitch”.[/quote]
As my father in law (a family doc) used to say – “a persons mother is a matter of record and his father is a matter if opinion”. Not so much anymore with genetic testing. And yes, biology is destiny. Or, more depressingly, we are transportation devices for our genes, who use us to propagate themselves in the highest copy number possible. The genes of those of us who have a small number of (or no) children will be diluted out by those who have many. I try not to think about it.[/quote]
Maybe we will learn to nurture offspring not born to blue bloods and it will matter less who actually conceives. It makes it easier to thin k about anyway.[/quote]I had people like the Duggars in mind. I don’t have much hope for nurturing their offspring.
ParticipantThe former principal at Ashley Falls (now head of Technology for the district) compulsively makes rules of the kind you are describing. No one ever seems to put the brakes on this guy (unless he was following some other administrators rules). He opened back to school night last year with reminders about these picayune rules. There never seems to be an end.
Participant[quote=scaredyclassic]There’s a saying, “any one (or dick) can make a,baby but it takes a real man to be a father”.
Doesn’t really work socially if you switch the genders.
A male,must prove himself manly even to remain in the family today.[/quote]
This is one of those things I’ve come to accept but not understand. The older I get the more of those things there are. Probably has something to do with watching my son grow up – babies have more preloaded software than I ever imagined.
Participant[quote=scaredyclassic]Because a male is never certain of paternity he must be in a constant state of uncertainty. Perhaps, therefore, “what’s up little bitch”.[/quote]
As my father in law (a family doc) used to say – “a persons mother is a matter of record and his father is a matter if opinion”. Not so much anymore with genetic testing. And yes, biology is destiny. Or, more depressingly, we are transportation devices for our genes, who use us to propagate themselves in the highest copy number possible. The genes of those of us who have a small number of (or no) children will be diluted out by those who have many. I try not to think about it.
Participant[quote=Blogstar][quote=njtosd][quote=scaredyclassic]Because women bear the burden of having kids, they are kind of screwed.[/quote]
Because you constantly feel that you must compete to be a real man, you are most definitely screwed. I have never once in my life questioned whether I am real woman, woman enough, etc. i have never posted pictures of my lats, delta or traps (or whatever) to show that I measure up. And bearing the burden of having kids makes us essential. In many species, the children are fathered by approximately 5-10% of the adult males, but the opposite is never true. :)[/quote]
If marriage and prostitution were taken out 10% of the males of our species would get 90% of the action with women too.
()(0[/quote]
Probably true. Not really a pleasant prospect for most of us.
Participant[quote=scaredyclassic]Because women bear the burden of having kids, they are kind of screwed.[/quote]
Because you constantly feel that you must compete to be a real man, you are most definitely screwed. I have never once in my life questioned whether I am real woman, woman enough, etc. i have never posted pictures of my lats, delta or traps (or whatever) to show that I measure up. And bearing the burden of having kids makes us essential. In many species, the children are fathered by approximately 5-10% of the adult males, but the opposite is never true. 🙂
ParticipantI have to say, CAR – I’ve been keeping track of this thread and in my opinion your usually very reasonable positions have taken on a very personal and somewhat contorted flavor. Like you, I am a woman, but unlike you I was raised with a brother and sister and I have a son and daughters. My mom was a science teacher, dad was a lawyer and both my brother and I got degrees in science and law (sister went into advertising and outdid us both). I believe I am raising my kids in a fairly gender neutral way – but boys/men and girls/women are not the same and never will be. There are men in the world who are misogynistic, but there are an equal number of women who appear to hate/dislike men (not a word for those women even though there are a lot of them). People have had bad experiences and tend to globalize. I have been treated badly on various occasions throughout my life for being young, old, female, thin, fat, single, married, high earning, low earning, etc. And for what it’s worth – watch the commercials on TV. In most commercials, if someone ends up looking foolish, it’s almost always a middle aged white man.
People will find a reason to feel superior to you if they want to. Go ahead and let them, and while they’re at it you should be busy getting done what you need to do to make yourself happy.
Participant[quote=CA renter]Is our society becoming even more misogynistic these days? Back when I was growing up in the 70s and 80s, we had fully mixed-gender groups of friends. I don’t ever remember a single instance when boys and girls were segregated from one another. Maybe it’s just my personality (not “girly”) and/or the groups of friends I’ve associated with over the years, but this was my experience in different regions, and in different social settings (different neighborhoods, different schools, even different countries).
We now have three daughters and have noticed that the boys and girls in our neighborhood and other social groups have become EXTREMELY segregated. Worst of all, we’ve noticed that it’s the parents who are not only encouraging this, but are forcing this on their children.
Is this a new trend, or is it a San Diego thing? Again, I’m from L.A., and we just didn’t have this sort of thing, but when I moved to SD, I noticed it even among our married friends. When we would all get together, the men would peel off from the women, and vice-versa. It was so obvious and deliberate, we just stopped hanging out with those people. Now, my DH and I are watching this situation with our kids, and it’s making us very uncomfortable.
Doe anyone actually think this is healthy for our kids? What would we be saying about this if we were talking about race or ethnicity? Why is gender the only category where discrimination and segregation are not only condoned, but encouraged? Why would anybody think this is okay?[/quote]
CA Renter – don’t you have a group of women you like to hang around with? Book club (or as my husband calls it, drinking club), hiking group, bunko, whatever?. I’m perfectly comfortable hanging out with mixed groups, or even groups of men (my profession is becoming more mixed, but I was the token female when I started), but I am most at ease with a group of female friends (and these days, frankly, female friends who are also moms). I feel like it’s a matter of common experience. I don’t see misogyny.
ParticipantFinally – I like Andrew Luck – and it appears he’s grown up to be a man …..http://www.wsj.com/articles/andrew-luck-the-nfls-most-perplexing-trash-talker-1418663249
Participant[quote=scaredyclassic][quote=Blogstar]Defense lawyers should have no say in this because they are used to standing up for the bad guy.
Men should not say anything because our society is sick with macho.[/quote]
Touche.
I’d say however our society is no different from any society in that boys long to become men … our society has no clear path, no jnitiation, and so we are not sick from machismo, but our inability to …. ummm…something to do with initiation.
Anyway, in my experience women are the meaner psychos to each other. Guys are relatively kind.[/quote]
I don’t think you have any right to discuss whether women are psychos because you’re a man.;)
Participant[quote=ltsdd]Is it true?
Is it kind?
Is it necessary?[/quote]
+1Who do you want your son to grow up to be? If this isn’t a step in the direction you are hoping for, I’d be concerned. Almost all people who say cruel/unkind things defend themselves by saying they were joking.
Participant[quote=scaredyclassic]
on the other hand, women buy 1000$ purses all the time that depreciate rapidly. why cant men accessorize and not feel dumb for spending money on something absolutely unnecessary.[/quote]
What women do you hang around with? I have never dreamed of spending that kind of money on a purse. I would feel very dumb if I ever did. On the other hand, I did find a Tag Heuer Targa Florio watch on deep discount one day and bought it for my husband. It was a good investment, and it is very good looking – and it made him happy.
Participant[quote=CA renter]
[Bernie Sanders] wants workers to be able to make a decent, respectable living.[/quote]Everybody wants that. Everybody wants good things for everyone. So lets say we could wave a magic wand and legislate this type of living into existence. Please define a decent, respectable living. What is the income necessary in southern CA? The upper peninsula of michigan? Should those numbers be different? Should people move to a place where they can live on a given salary? Etc.
My point is this – ideas and laudable goals are fun. We can all pontificate on all the good things that everyone should have. But actually coming up with a constitutional system that achieves those ends is very difficult.
Participant[quote=flyer]Sad to see so many of these incidents, but glad many are being visually documented, so (hopefully) those involved can be dealt with appropriately.
The world definitely seems to be evolving into a more hostile environment on all fronts, but it really shouldn’t come as too much of a surprise when you realize, even in the US, much of the population are literally fighting for their lives when it comes to things like long-term financial security/survival (and all that
includes–jobs, retirement, education, housing–etc.) for themselves and their families. Since a lot of anger goes along with that, it does tend to create chaos in society at many levels.[/quote]I don’t think it’s more hostile. I think we have a lot more data about what people do when they think they’re not being watched. In fact, my guess is that the fear of being caught on camera is causing police officers, and others, to behave better. Similar to DNA technology becoming available – it deterred criminals from committing crimes, especially those who feared that there might be evidence in the system of more than one crime.
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