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bearishgurl.
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February 23, 2016 at 1:28 PM #794757February 23, 2016 at 1:55 PM #794758
FlyerInHi
Guest[quote=bearishgurl] I recently attended a fundraiser on a CSU campus put on by my youngest kid’s Greek organization. There were a few “movers and shakers” present … ALL “alumni” and local philanthropists. I can assure you that NONE of them have had “mediocre” careers or lives.[/quote]
There are “movers and shakers” at fundraisers for Father Joe’s Village also.
February 23, 2016 at 2:01 PM #794759The-Shoveler
ParticipantOur Software Development manager probably spends that much on his kids as well but he lives in Beverly Hills.
I guess if you have a home worth maybe 5-10 Mil it’s kind of expected.
February 23, 2016 at 2:09 PM #794760bearishgurl
Participant[quote=FlyerInHi]Like Bernie Sanders said, university education is now an extension of High School. The bar has been raised.
There are plenty of paths to “success” but if kids are smart, why not give them “the best”, if you can afford it.
If you can afford it, what are you saving the money for? To buy big trucks and expensive toys like your brethren in TX and OK, do?[/quote]You’re just being obstinate, FIH. People with young kids today have NO IDEA how much college is going to cost them 10-15 years hence. Nor do they know how much rents will be in the locale of the campus their kid is admitted to (which may but very likely will NOT be their “1st or 2nd choice” campus). It’s scary!
The BIG money spent on kids should be spent where it counts and that is college prep and college (or vocational school, as the case may be). It wasn’t my idea for my kids to be in show choir. I was against it and all the traveling expense (over and above the exorbitantly expensive costumes they had to buy/rent) because I KNEW CA public university systems would not credit them for this experience in the admissions process nor would the three out-of-state campuses give them credit for it (for which they were guaranteed copious financial aid but didn’t end up applying to). I didn’t have any say in the matter and was “railroaded” into it. Aside from the in-state (mostly by school bus) cities my kids frequently visited for show choir, their performance schedule also took them (by air) to national “competition” shows in Boston, Manhattan (NYC), Chicago and Honolulu, which of course, cost a lot of $$. There is also the 8th grade trip to pay for each kid (in our district it was Wash DC). And they all had braces on their teeth. It’s all expensive and I understand expensive. But kids actually remember what they did and learned at age 14 and up but NOT at age 2-5. At age 2-4, in particular, they need love, attention, stories and playtime, NOT drilled and grilled incessantly and forced to learn to read music and play piano or violin. (Not saying here that this is the case with yamashi’s kids). Kids this age are too young to even learn ballet, tap, jazz, hip-hop or martial arts. It’s crazymaking! Have you ever watched a Pre-Ballet show of 3-year olds twirling around on stage? They have absolutely no idea what they’re doing and it’s hilarious!
When I was 19, I “retired” from my amateur athletic “career” and obtained certification to judge local gymnastic meets. I got a job teaching tumbling at the local YMCA and they would not even allow kids younger than five in my classes (we used a spotting belt and the student had to understand our instructions implicitly). After the first 6-8 week session, the Y decided the beginning tumbling students had to be 6 to be in my class. Even that age is marginal to begin learning the discipline that is expected of them and what they need to do to even acquire basic skills. Little kid’s brains aren’t ready for all the stuff parents today want to try to cram into them, imho.
February 23, 2016 at 2:10 PM #794761Participant[quote=FlyerInHi][quote=bearishgurl] I recently attended a fundraiser on a CSU campus put on by my youngest kid’s Greek organization. There were a few “movers and shakers” present … ALL “alumni” and local philanthropists. I can assure you that NONE of them have had “mediocre” careers or lives.[/quote]
There are “movers and shakers” at fundraisers for Father Joe’s Village also.[/quote]How do you know if any of them graduated from a CSU??
February 23, 2016 at 2:16 PM #794762Participant[quote=scaredyclassic]Except for fear of the future, lately I think it’s best to consume and give money now. It’s not going to be more fun in the future. Help from my folks would’ve been much more useful 20 years ago when my kids were little. Now, it’s not really needed….[/quote]Yeah, but back then, you probably would have spent it on diapers, formula and home daycare, NOT $400 mo “Saturday school,” lol …
I know how you can get your kid into “Saturday school” for free. Just make sure they have one or more “unexcused absences” for any period of the day before the end of the semester. They can get one free four-hour “Saturday school” session for every 1-4 unexcused absences …. depending on how much time there is left until the end of the semester, lol :=0
February 23, 2016 at 2:37 PM #794763millennial
Participant[quote]yamashi, this is a breathtaking amount every month to be spending on preschool and elementary school-age children who are attending public school. You claim you recently bought a house and one of you (parents) can quit work any time and you’ll still “be fine” financially. I understand pre-school/pre-K costs more now than when I sent my kids to those programs but sheesh, $3000 month is very, very expensive for two kids who are already potty trained and not confined to a crib where state rules require one caregiver to every four cribs. [/quote]
Not sure where when your kids were around but it is pretty much the going rate for an infant and a private preschool. Trust me, this is my 3rd and the other ones ranged from $1,250-$1,395/month. Of course this amount is probably where you live. Next year I’m going to be pulling out my daughter from the private school and she will be in public so that will be a nice addition to my savings every month.
[quote]I also paid for dance, voice lessons, baseball and scout camp for many years for my school-age children, as well as (very expensive) show choir in middle/HS but none of it was anywhere near as expensive as what you are quoting here! [/quote]
Tutoring for two children range are about $200/month or $50 per week for each. Language arts about the same. Piano is about $55 per week to teach two kids for 45 minutes. I also do father and daughter camping trips with them which add an additional 150-300 per month and other stuff that she does through school. During the summer we also do swimming lessons which add more.
[quote]IMO, this is a absolutely a “mind-boggling” list of activities for young children. It sounds as if they are busy 24/7! I hope they don’t burn out early in life :-0[/quote]
Many think so too, but they seem to love it. Both of my oldest ones love to teach their classmates things that they know. They also enjoy learning about languages and piano. My job as a parent I feel is to keep letting them do what they enjoy. I have also tried golf and soccer, but that didn’t seem to stick.
[quote}A little “food for thought” here. For $45-$48K per year (a little less than what you are paying now for young kids’ care and activities), you can currently send TWO kids to CSU (different campuses) in URBAN cities in CA (LA and SF bay area) WITHOUT any financial aid!…[/quote]
I put enough money into their 529 plans each month to cover about that much per year in today’s dollars for them when they get older (assuming 3-5% compounded appreciation). Both grandparents have also set aside some money. Hopefully they don’t need it. I told them if they can get a free ride or other assistance, then that money is for them to keep.
[quote]Down the road, you could invest $600-$800 per course on 6-8 week SAT prep courses. THAT’s where the “rubber meets the road” in a child’s life. College admission boards DON’T CARE what your kid did in any grade before grade 9. [/quote]
I will do that if they want to, but right now I just want my kids to be well rounded and be able to do things they enjoy. I want my girls to grow up with self confidence and strong self esteem. I feel that if they start young with this, then it will go with them throughout the rest of their lives. I try to also instill values like grit and tenacity so that they don’t give up easily and find ways to get around barriers. I’m not teaching them SAT stuff at this age. I’m teaching them values.
[quote]Public universities in CA don’t even care what extracurricular activities your kid did in HS! My kids were BUSY in HS with a rigorous schedule of performing in HS’s all over the state for YEARS and the CSU mentor (application portal for the CSU Admissions Board) gave them no credit whatsoever for it [/quote]
From my experience I have found this to be false. Not sure what CSU schools require for admission, but when I was applying to numerous undergraduate schools this was a large part of the admission criteria. In addition, many essays required me to use material from my extracurricular activities to display my leadership abilities etc; and when interviewed I was always asked these questions.
[quote]Yes, at least 9 months of pre-K is very, very important when your kid is 4 and expected to enter K the following year.[/quote] You are correct, I find that giving them a headstart before Kindergarten gave my oldest a very important advantage compared to peers. I think that once kids are identified by peers/teachers/themselves as smart they tend to have higher self esteem and have higher expectations for themselves and from peers at an early age. This same thing compounds each year and to each kid in the same household. I think teachers talk to each other and say “oh you have x, you’re going to love her, she is so smart”, or “that was your sister! I had her and she was such a nice intelligent kid”
[quote]yamashi, if you have a big enough tree, did you ever think of tying an old tire onto a branch to make a swing? [/quote]
My child likes it when we play duets together on the piano each day and I take her camping. To each their own.
February 23, 2016 at 2:44 PM #794764Participant[quote=scaredyclassic]Hell I just realized I’m spending a grand a year on piano lessons.
I went to a recital in encinitas this weekend. The whole thing got me weepy. I was deeply moved. I like taking him to the lesson Friday nites. Little ritual. I go for a walk and call my mom. It’s close by. Sometimes we stop after for snacks.[/quote]
It’s expensive but it’s worth it. I spent my childhood doing the same thing with my father. He would take my sister and I to piano lessons every Wednesday night before dinner and afterwards we got to pick our own frozen food item at the grocery store. My favorite was the Swanson Salisbury Steak with the reconstituted mashed potatoes. I don’t think I’ve had one since, but I still remember our little rituals to this day.
February 23, 2016 at 2:49 PM #794765Participant[quote=BG]
The Regents/UC admission board doesn’t care about extracurricular activities in HS, either. Not a whit. An applicant’s highest SAT score plus HS GPA is the name of the game. And it doesn’t help that many thousands of deep-pocketed foreign applicants who are willing to pay the “full ride” will be his kids’ “competition.”It’s a crapshoot out there. [/quote]
This is false for UC Berkeley at least. My longtime friend is on the admissions over there. That was probably more the name of the game before, but now kids have to differentiate themselves even more from competition. They want the smartest, leader with a good heart, cares about the environment, plays 3 sports, concert pianist, and good speaker.
February 23, 2016 at 2:51 PM #794766Participant[quote=The-Shoveler][quote=FlyerInHi]From what I understand, $4,000 for 3 kids is about right.
[/quote]That’s like a House payment in the better parts of CV LOL.
Anyway if your rich enough, spend your money how you see fit.[/quote]
Not rich, but yes I do spend my money on my kids. To me they are more important then living in the best parts of CV.
February 23, 2016 at 2:54 PM #794767GuestBG, I don’t think it’s being obstinate to spend money on education. Those are the going rates. It’s unfortunate that we don’t have public preschool. But the costs are what they are.
Better than spending money on SUVs, off road vehicles, and getting your nails done every week like so many who don’t care about eduction do.
My observations are that intellectual curiosity begins at an early age.
February 23, 2016 at 2:55 PM #794768Participant[quote=The-Shoveler]Our Software Development manager probably spends that much on his kids as well but he lives in Beverly Hills.
I guess if you have a home worth maybe 5-10 Mil it’s kind of expected.[/quote]
Lol, shoveler. I suspect he spends it on private school. If not, then “finishing school.” Umm, CA public HS’s (no, not even BHHS) aren’t exactly capable of turning out the typical graduate who knows how to walk it, talk it and groom it for the business world :=0
I’ve depended upon my kids’ Greek organizations to be their “finishing school” and so far, so good. This experience has also paved the way for being selected for their first jobs thru the networking they were exposed to while college-student members of their respective organizations. And no way were/are their annual dues anywhere near $4000 yr. They’re more like $1K per year, max (which my kids paid/pay with earnings from their PT jobs).
February 23, 2016 at 2:55 PM #794769Participant[quote=The-Shoveler]Our Software Development manager probably spends that much on his kids as well but he lives in Beverly Hills.
I guess if you have a home worth maybe 5-10 Mil it’s kind of expected.[/quote]
I really think how much I spend per kid is average, or close to average. Noone said raising children is cheap. I forgot what I was watching yesterday, but they stated that it costs around $1 Million to raise 1 child in CA. Not sure if that is the total amount or the PV, but it sounds about right.
February 23, 2016 at 3:00 PM #794771Participant[quote=FlyerInHi]BG, I don’t think it’s being obstinate to spend money on education. Those are the going rates. It’s unfortunate that we don’t have public preschool. But the costs are what they are. . . [/quote]The way it was described here, the money was not all spent on “education.” Not sure how you’re reading yamashi’s post but I read that the bulk of it was spent on daycare, after-school care and extracurricular activities.
And we DO have publicly subsidized preschool that has been in place for at least 30 years. It’s called “Head Start” but based upon yamashi’s posts, his family likely can’t qualify for it.
February 23, 2016 at 3:05 PM #794772Participant[quote=bearishgurl]
Lol, shoveler. I suspect he spends it on private school. If not, then “finishing school.” Umm, CA public HS’s (no, not even BHHS) aren’t exactly capable of turning out the typical graduate who knows how to walk it, talk it and groom it for the business world :=0I’ve depended upon my kids’ Greek organizations to be their “finishing school” and so far, so good. This experience has also paved the way for being selected for their first jobs thru the networking they were exposed to while college-student members of their respective organizations. And no way were/are their annual dues anywhere near $4000 yr. They’re more like $1K per year, max (which my kids paid/pay with earnings from their PT jobs).[/quote]
Not sure what the hoopla is here. You asked some questions, and I gave you some personal answers to what it is like to be a millennial. I gave you my going rates to have someone watch a baby and a girl all day. You continue to argue that it’s too much, but that’s what I have to pay until I can get them to public school. It’s just what it is.
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