ot. real estate in heaven

[scaredyclassic]

thinking about moving to heaven. interested in info on best religions for their heaven types and locations, housing, etc. would like to be close to G- d, the beach.

ideally would like to be with other good families. no riff raff.

own planet preferred, per Mormon heaven, possibly. anyone know an agent on Kolob?

https://www.theatlantic.com/entertainment/archive/2014/02/mormons-dont-get-planet-once-they-die-say-mormons/358669/

can someone recommend a broker for a good fixed rate eternal mortgage?

[FlyerInHi]

Can I be your neighbor? I’m good family. No riff raff.

[Anonymous]

Give Leo a hug for me.

[scaredyclassic]

sure.

but maybe we should gentrify an up and coming heaven, maybe a growing cult? go in on a duplex together? might be better longterm. everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die. heaven real Estate investing is not for sissies

[scaredyclassic]

So this might sound a little odd but although I am a hardcore atheist, I listen to A LOT of Christian radio, always in my car, always when im riding to or from work. I LOVE CHRISTIAN RADIO. I love hearing preachers. not crappy local guys. bbig league heavy hitters.

It gets me fired up. I have listened to Christian radio for over ten years, and I recommend Christian radio to all young attorneys, and really anyone who does public speaking. I have my own style, but its based off many years of listening to these guys. I believe that the way they speak is the way to address groups of people in large groups when trying to persuade them. Intensity, absolute belief in your message, great pacing, soft, loud, stop go, building, letting go, ham it up, scream, cry, fall deathly silent, howl, it’s like a beautiful sexual episode.

Coincidentally (although with G-d there are no “coincidences” I was listening to jack Hibbs of calvarry chapel on the way home today. He’s far from my favorite, but, not terrible. Just not strong enough for me. He seems like he’s not 100% in, at least to me (he appears to be suffering from medical problems, per the internet).

Anyway, his program today on 88.1 was WHO TOLD YOU YOU’RE GOING TO HEAVEN? Man he had his people going. They loved him. Apparently, you need to know that lots of Christians who believe in G-d and do all the right things and pray constantly and read their bible and love Jesus ARE GOING TO HELL. The only way to get to heaven is to be BORN AGAIN. Huh. There you have it/ heaven has an HOA I guess, or at least some restrictive covenants. No one’s getting any real estate there unless BORN AGAIN. Not sure if shell companies can buy up lots thereon spec for others, or what the deal is re investment properties.

If you need to speak to a group, ALWAYS S put on Christian radio to get psyched up. Those guys KNOW how to SELL IT. I owe them a debt of gratitude, attitude and beatitude. [powerful groupings of 3 words repeated can work nice].

[zk]

I think a good name for a christian rock band would be “The Stepford Zombie Squirrels”

[quote=outtamojo]Stripped of its past programming is it even the same squirrel? It’s probably some kind of stepford zombie squirrel too dumb to even wonder how it got there.[/quote]

[scaredyclassic]

we can do better, publicity wise. maybe something antigay behavior. that’s popular in Calvary chapel I think….what about

Homo Hellfire.
The Sodomites
jesus hates Sodomy.
HOMOSICK [I like this one)
the antihomos.

[FlyerInHi]

Scaredy, I really want to be your neighbor in heaven. Please introduce your estate broker to me. I think I’m intellectually in love with you.

When driving to and fro Vegas, I listen to Christian radio as well and I have thought about all the points you made. Of course, you put it more beautifully than I would because you are my intellectual superior.

Now, if the Christian messages were ads, the marketers would wonder why you haven’t bought their products or services. The messages are clearly reaching you but you have not been sold in 10 years of listening. They need to send periodic special coupons, money back warranty vouchers or something.

Also, clearly Christian media are effective and do get people fired up. But what would it take for you to buy it?

[FlyerInHi]

Maybe heaven is just swamp land.

All the great cities in the world were swamps. Once enough people move in, the land becomes desirable.

[gzz]

You tell young lawyers to sound like radio preachers? Few problems with this advice:
1 Most young lawyers don’t get to speak in court 2. Median age of a judge is about 70. You have to speak Loudly and Clearly. 3. If you start speaking quickly cause the Holy Spirit has got into you, the court reporter will tell you to slow down. 4. Majority of judges interrupt you before you get out two sentences.

[Anonymous]

If you are still looking for a property, here are some Realtors® that can help:

[scaredyclassic]

[quote=gzz]You tell young lawyers to sound like radio preachers? Few problems with this advice:
1 Most young lawyers don’t get to speak in court 2. Median age of a judge is about 70. You have to speak Loudly and Clearly. 3. If you start speaking quickly cause the Holy Spirit has got into you, the court reporter will tell you to slow down. 4. Majority of judges interrupt you before you get out two sentences.[/quote]

listen to Christian radio. absorb. adapt.
it’s a perspective.

facts don’t persuade.

feelings persuade.

“i’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
Maya Angelou

people look to how strongly you believe what you are saying. if you don’t believe in it, no one will believe in you.

“the good lawyer is not the man who has an eye to every side and angle of contingency, and qualifies all his qualifications, but who throws himself on your part so heartily, that he can get you out of a scrape.”

ralph Waldo emerson.

imagine this. Christian radio transcribed and read by your dullest college professor, the one that made your eyes Cross within 2 minutes, even when you really truly wanted to listen. .

same exact message.

no one believes. or even actually hears it, except the proverbial choir. it seems to invite more questions than it answers.

be more like jack hibbs in WHATEVER message you sell…not boring. what makes someone not boring in their persuasive pitch?

the style IMO needs to be this: the message feels urgent, of extreme importance and you believe this message with the core of your being.

[FlyerInHi]

Scaredy, I think God can make you a very wealthy attorney. Listen to the prosperity gospel so you can buy your slice of heaven.

Are you following Michael Avenatti, Stormie Daniels’ attorney on TV? Avenatti is so much better than the other lawyers.

[njtosd]

Nature has taken millions of years of experience and distilled it into our emotions/instincts. Any genes that made people stay around to pet the cute saber tooth tiger? Gone. Any genes that led you to hang around and ask an aggressor about the weight and/or density of his club (logically speaking, it could be styrofoam . . . )? Gone. Any genes that allowed you to leave your baby alone on the ground while you went to see your friend 3 caves down? Gone.

Has anyone ever used logic to decide who to be friends with? Logic is good for figuring out when our emotions are being used to trick us (i.e. in court when you show a video of the poor injured worker playing volleyball the previous weekend) but it is secondary. So, yes, appeal to the emotions first and then use logic as a secondary reinforcer.

I have always found this story of Elliott (a man who lost the ability to call on emotion when making decisions) to be fascinating: https://www.thecut.com/2016/06/how-only-using-logic-destroyed-a-man.html

[FlyerInHi]

Too many emotions. Evolution has not kept up the technology.

Emotions don’t results in good outcomes. The Greek knew it and that’s why they values reason. You clearly see it in architecture. Houses that are well designed using reason actually result in better wellbeing and emotional contentment.

Isn’t the law about reason and intellect?

[Author]

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