Marion, nice comments, and it is o.k. to think aloud and ask for advice, the fact that you think about it puts you ahead of the curve.
But my theory is not a temporary one until you get serious with someone, you need to keep it that way even if you do get serious with someone. If he’s worth his salt, he’ll deal with seeing you a few days a week until you kids are grown, depending on the age of the kids that may only be the length of a car loan and a lot of “serious” relationships still fall apart after a year or two. I am completely upfront about it when meeting a new woman, I make no bones about it, I mention that I will not see them on holidays, I use my vacation time with my kids and I won’t be answering the phone on the days and the hours I’m with my kids, final answer (never give out the house number, just the cell and throw it on vibrate during homework and dinner). It has a nice side effect of screening out the flakes, the gold diggers and the divorced women not happy with their new lifestyle economically as a single. I call it “psuedo-prostitute repellent.” It eliminates those that need me and leaves me with those that want me. I don’t mind having to get a new girlfriend when they can’t deal with it, that is actually my favorite part. It’s a win/win and it is a lifestyle you need to commit to for the long haul. If you find someone that fits into that lifestyle, great, if you end up dating dozens of people before that last kid goes to college, that’s great too.
