Lakewood and Rossmoor are nice places to live. There are desirable parts of Cypress, Cerritos, Los Alamitos, La Mirada, La Palma, and eastern Long Beach, though those might be at the outer edge of your driving radius.
As far as traffic congestion … from what I remember the 105 and 710 not quite as bad; 22, 91 and 405 can be bad; and the 5 should be avoided at all costs, day or night. Watch the various online traffic maps during commute hours to see the real choke points.
Dunno about the “Real Housewives” factor … seems every area has some kind of problem with some percentage of the older kids, though maybe not quite as outrageous as on that @#$%&! TV show.