Thanks for calling New FNMA for your home purchase needs. You want to buy that $1.2 million house? What’s standing in your way? Downpayment? No problem, we have this new no-downpayment plan, the Paulson Put Plan. Next issue. Payments too high? No problem, we have a new low early payment plan, the Bernanke No Depression Ever Again Plan. We can layer them together for you.
What’s holding you back? If house prices go up, you win. If house prices go down, you don’t lose.
Of course house prices will be higher than they would otherwise be with this bailout plan and all the control it gives Barney Frank and Chris Dodd and Chuck Schumer and others. You already knew that.
