Just an addendum, the 2k daycare is bugging me. Is there a grandparent or relative that isn’t doing anything? It’s almost the equivalent of rent. I feel blessed seeing your story since I only had to deal with the childcare thing for a short time, but a place with another room, even a place you buy, shouldn’t be 2k more and many people have a relative who would exchange free rent/utilities/food for childcare. Because you wrote of the trips to visit relatives in Europe, it may not be an option. If it is, that can be soloution. With so many people unemployed, are you related to any of them that wouldn’t mind living in So Cal for free? Grandparents and great grandparents can be a nice influence on the younguns, sometimes it is an impossibility but sometimes all you need to do is ask.
