This is the other SD Realtor responding. I have sold a few listings in Escala and indeed it is a very nice place. I think that your choice should be dictated by what it most important to you. If commute is the biggest issue then I would move out further north/east. You mentioned Carmel Valley as a potential choice as well That may not be a bad idea as you can be in the 56 corridor and jet right up to I15. Also you will get more house for the money. I think Escala is great but I am not sold on raising my kids in a complex like that. Also the surrounding schools are not exceptional. Also if you want something in the newer category of housing stock be prepared to pay Mello Roos fees.
Now I would definitely agree with other comments to exercise patience. Like you I am also renting right now and while we REALLY want to buy a home, I think that waiting is the right thing to do and we could realize substantial savings. When your lease expires in August you should consider renewing it for at least 6 more months OR just let it convert to a month to month, (which is what happens if you do nothing)…
You may fall into a great situation where someone overextended themselves in a 2003-2005 purchase in a nice Carmel Valley home and they must short sell in 2008… I think there will be lots of those.