[quote=scaredyclassic][quote=Coronita][quote=scaredyclassic][quote=flyer]Youngest son loved UCSD. He felt he found exactly what he was looking for close to home. Other kids attended elsewhere–daughter, Harvard, eldest son, USC.

You younger parents out there will find, as my wife and I have found, that watching your kids reach for and achieve their dreams is more fulfilling than most anything else you will experience in life, and that all of the work you and they put in is definitely worth it.[/quote]

The truth is, if you can’t pay cash for tuition comfortably, and you or your kid go into debt for a name school, you’re a dumbass. Obviously tuition is pocket change for flyer. But I wouldn’t even let my kids apply to an ivy for fear they’d get in.[/quote]

Interesting. I’m in an interesting predicament… For the longest time, I thought that it was important for my kid to get into the “best” college they could possibly get into and because of that I had financially planned for the worst case scenario: admission to one of these pedigree Ivy League schools, no financial aid… And so I’ve set aside 4 years of undergrad + 2 years of grad school tuition+room and board for that purpose in a 529k college savings plan and am pretty much ready 3 years early.

But here’s the wrinkle…I’ve talked to my kid about this, and despite me saying repeatedly to “aim for the stars”, you know what response I got?

I am aiming for the stars, “I don’t want to participate in a Donald Trump-like white privilege game, where the “best” is a name that can be easily bought by white privileged family for incompetent kids that can’t make it by themselves….”

I was shocked, and I was like “you can’t think that way”… And she was like, but it’s true…Look how dumb Donald Trump is and dumb George Bush is, and they got into those Ivy League schools. And look at all the hoops that Asian kids have to jump through. Why would you want to spend money to participate in this White Privilege game? We’re not white, we’re Asian, we should play our own games.

I swear I had nothing to do with this. You know how asian parents are. Always wanting their kids to get into the pedigree colleges…I mean, honestly, I don’t really care where my kid ends up going since based on my experience, having an Ivy League degree in engineering doesn’t really matter versus any state school… In fact I don’t see many people throughout the 20+years of my career with such a pedigree degree and the ones that had one, a lot of them suck in what they do. With the exception of Cornell Engineering, Ivy League schools aren’t known for their engineering programs and state school with their large corporate endowments prepare their students way better than Ivy Leagues. So with the exception of maybe MIT, CalTech, Harvey Mudd, and Stanford Engineering (who has some really bright kids), you’re just spending money on a brand that frankly in tech doesn’t make that much of a difference.

Also, to my kids point, Ivy Leagues do disproportionately punish asian american kids with those admissions quotas. So my kid did make me think about it and say, do I really want to support a system that supports this. I mean I would boycott a business that does this, why would I want to support a school that does this.

So I think the conclusion is, I’m going to ask my kid to apply to an ivy league school(s) anyway…And if my kid gets in with a full ride/scholarship , great…But otherwise, I’m not going to spend a dime more than what I would spend on a good public school to support this system.[/quote]

VIVA LA REVOLUCION![/quote]

I think you’re right though. I’d much rather see my kid achieve what they achieve through their own merit through their struggles and overcoming their struggles, rather than easily buy my kid’s way into something.

It’s like the same concept. I don’t really have a desire to buy a lottery ticket to win a lottery so I can be “rich”… For me it’s not the money, it’s the journey getting and building it. Granted it doesn’t have to be built completely with my career tools like engineering, or stock options grants at a company… It could be investing and doing a side hustle, but at least it’s still something I did…

I don’t understand this generation that well and am trying to understand them. There’s this other thing going on about being anti- Fast Fashion. I don’t get it that well, but I think what it means it’s a going trend about some younger people be anti-corporations that exploit overseas paying them substandard wages and living conditions to make clothes that we consume here….

So it’s almost like a cult like trend to prefer to buy second hand, reused cloths from places like Poshmark… Or to buy hand made clothes from individuals like places like Etsy… I guess it’s this generation’s way of being anti-Walmart??? So it’s weird. My kid makes her own dress and clothes…which probably costs more than if she bought them… She wanted an embrodiery/sewing machine, so I said sure, why not…