Having limitations with male friendships is pretty standard. We have some many conflicting instincts as human beings. Brotherly love, which I believe is innate instinct, and individual survival and reproduction are in direct conflict. Competition is still the primary dynamic among men. People are plain afraid of other people, even if not completely paranoid. This is kind of a new thought to me so I can’t really elaborate on what I am getting at. But anyway don’t feel like the only one if you don’t have lots of male friends.

I think most of what I see in men interacting in groups doesn’t look much like friendship when studied. It’s more like networking, or worse, something gang banging, or herding into groups for protection. Perhaps more innocently , just passing time in mutually entertaining ways. Possibly a combination of these things. The gang banging isn’t just the uncivilized types we think of either. Anyway , like wild dogs in a pack, a group of men does not mean a troop of friends at all. There may not be even a pair of really good friends in the whole bunch of them. That is definitely not to say there aren’t great friendships and mutual respect , or that superficial companionship isn’t valuable. I am not saying we are exactly dogs. Science agrees we are closer to other animals after all. Even in my chaotic life(first half) with my non-herd views and difficult personality , I have had a few great friends and still do.

Can’t speak about women to women on this issue. It’s pretty understandable why many of us men find women more open to us than men are , even if we aren’t very sensitive to feminist views. Women generally want to explore men to find out what they are about . They are more open to us for lots of reasons including that they see us as potential sources of protection in bad circumstances, or as a potential replacement mate. Of course some of this stuff runs below the surface, also often times not so below. I don’t think having it easier with women proves anything regarding difficulties with having good male friends. Maybe with the exception that being around women affects the necessary trust due to fear of competition. Of course, with young people, males often want to hang around with males who are popular with females but again, that’s not friendship really.