Honestly, speaking as a current NY’er who owns property in SD, I’d strongly consider staying in the NYC area unless there are compelling reasons not to do so.

If you do move to SD (and I will be hammered on here for saying this), choose a walkable area — perhaps one of the beach cities in SD or beach towns in North County. Being locked in a ‘burb development, tied to the parental car is no damn way for a kid to grow up.

Problem is that right now, you get more bang for the buck as far as property in the NY suburbs than in SD.