[quote=Blogstar]
Having to have the hottest girls or hate them is a value system. [/quote]
I don’t agree with that. A value system says, “I value hot girls.” It might also say, “If I don’t have them, I’ll be miserable.” Having to have them or hate them is, IMHO, not a value system, but rather an inability to cope with not getting what you want. I see that as a personality flaw, not a value-system flaw.
Do you think his dad taught him, “If you can’t have hot girls, then hate them”?
You seem a bit upset at the attribution of his violence to mental illness. It seems that what upsets you is the reflexive assumption that he has mental illness and your perception that the parents aren’t being given any blame. But I don’t think that saying he has mental illness immediately and completely absolves the parents of any blame.
In watching his video and reading his manifesto (I’m only on page 40), he seems to have a very strong sense of entitlement. This, to me, seems to be at the root of the problem. Where does that sense of entitlement come from? It seems to have been so strong from such an early age that it’s hard to completely pin it on the parents.
Anybody with more than one kid knows that they come into the world different from each other. Isn’t it possible that some come into the world so different that no amount of parenting will save them? And isn’t it possible that some people come into the world such that only massive, super-high-quality intervention will save them? And then all the way up the spectrum to a genetic makeup such that only a really bad upbringing will ruin them and even to nothing can really turn them bad? And can parents of the only-saved-by-massive-intervention kids really be blamed if they tried their best and their kids turned out killers anyway?
Your three kids are all different from each other, as you’ve said. But they’re different in normal ways. I think that’s more luck than you realize it is. You’re teaching them to deal with life given their own unique personalities. That’s what good parents do. But I get the feeling that you aren’t really willing to accept the probability that some kids are just born f’d up beyond repair, or beyond the abilities of their parents to repair.
