It sounds like you already have your mind made up. It also sounds like you are pretty sensitive. If you can’t remember that shit happens and you deal with it, then you probably won’t ever be able to get along with your neighbors.

Again, put up the fence and let bygones be bygones. Install a drain where their off flow is irritating you. My wife has a great saying, “Don’t engage the crazy”. I simply remind you to not become the crazy people avoid engaging with.