Partypup: Don’t forget the Claymore mines! You’ll also need something heavy, preferably a .50cal, to control the open areas of your property. Don’t forget: Maintain good fields of fire.

They also have lots of those “free love” hippie types going free range up there in Ojai, too. Watch out for VW microbuses, Grateful Dead t-shirts and excessive body hair/odor. Those are tip-offs that those granola crunching peaceniks are nearby. Same with references to the ’60s, Mother Jones magazine and “The Man”.