Does it count if the woman with children is married but is the primary bread winner? A lot of the discussion assumes single parenting…

I know several couples that have children – the mom works, the dad stays home. How does that fit the woman as gold digger model? And some of the men had great careers prior to making the choice to be a SAHD. These guys had real careers – engineers, finance, etc. But they like being full time parents… and their wives like their careers.

I know even more couples where both parents work and the mom makes more than the dad. How does that fit the gold-digger model?

Couples who choose to have kids figure out what works for their family. Of the families I know with stay at home parents – the couples weighed the decision and did what worked for them.

As far as my personal experience with single parents by choice – I know two. One used a sperm bank. One used a ‘live donor’ but it was understood there would be no child support. Both got pregnant intentionally. All of my other friends were also intentional about having kids – but did it with planning/discussion with their partners… no planned “oopsies”. Again, maybe it’s the folks I hang with… but I hang with honest people who wouldn’t pull that kind of deception. (And who are smart enough to know about birth control and use it.)

My best friend was clear she never wanted kids when she got married. Her (now ex) husband was “fine” with it – for the first few years… then started campaigning to change her mind.