Who else in this world gets paid to sleep and guaranteed overtime?

My boss would be beating on my motel room door at 2am screaming “What are you still doing here. Get up and get the @ out of here. I’m not paying overtime to sleep.

Send them home after 8-10 hours and make them work shifts like cops and the rest of the world. Give them a shower and a locker.

You want a fast response time, make them sit in the truck at key intersection between calls.

Ever since 9/11 we’ve brought our heros compensation way up. From “I’d do that if it payed a little better and wasn’t so boring most of the time” to “why the @ didn’t I do that”.

Next time I see 2 trucks full of taxpayer gas roll up to the mall for lunch and them walking in slow as molasses I’m gana freak out.

just blame drought
“sorry your wasting to much water washing the trucks and we can’t find anything else around here for you to do except linseed the axe handles and workout in the air conditioned gym. We’ve found your spending more on linseed oil then the cost of new handles and doctors are concerned about the high rate of disability from repetitive motion injury among retirees so we’re closing the gym too”.