Of course this argument is all about the personal definition of what one can “afford”

That definition comes down to who you listen to – your gut feeling and personal knowledge of your finances?

OR

What someone tells you you can afford, makes the deal, and walks away.

Anecdote: We have always paid cash for our cars; we figure out what we can afford and then go shopping. Every single car dealer immediately jumps and says “with that kind of downpayment you can by this beauty!” This salesman may be sincere because this may be the way he does his personal business.

We were amazed when we first qualified for a mortgage – we thought “there is no way we can afford that”

Back when you actually had to qualify for mortgage money it was different. Nowdays people seem to think that if they can get it, it means they can afford it.