I suspect this woman is mentally ill, probaly major depressive disorder. I feel bad for her, as properly viewed and reacted to appropriately, a bankruptcy can be an immensely freeing event. Imagine slaving under a yoke of debt that is instantly removed. What you do afterward defines you as a person, not the event itself. After 3 years this woman should have been able to completely put this event behind her and move on with her life as if it had never happened, which is the advice she received. The fact that she still perseverates about it is a sign of an unhealthy mind. She should seek help to put this event permanently behind her.