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November 13, 2015 at 3:39 PM in reply to: Millenia (Is it truly the “Next thing” The South County is looking for?) #791304
bearishgurl
Participant[quote=scaredyclassic]maybe im just another casualty of feminist dogma, like the childlessolder female exec who wakes up and realizes shed rather have just stayed home and had babies.[/quote]LOL, scaredy, I am your female counterpart, EXCEPT I didn’t “stay home and have babies.” I actually had them DURING FT employment and went back to work when my (6-8 wk) “maternity leave” was up, as did the vast majority of my “counterparts” of that era. We ALL survived and our kids fared better for the example we set for them! They are all VERY successful now and no one can take that away from them.
bearishgurl
Participant.
bearishgurl
Participant[quote=FlyerInHi]BG, I just meant to say that you can’t just let the state take care of your kids. They are many young folks who can’t do what they want because they don’t have family financial support.
Some people just don’t have the inclination of getting a marketable degree and going to work right after college. Some people find their ways later. For those guys, family support is essential or they can drift down quickly.
Of course, everyone is different, but I don’t think leaving the rat race is recommended for most people.
I just met a neighbor at complex where I have a rental. She is 21 with new baby child and husband. Her parents paid cash for the condo in a nice community, Seven Hills in Vegas. Good school district. Without her parents she could be a drug addict living in the hood.[/quote]
I agree that students going to public colleges in CA without financial aid (waivers, grants or scholarships they don’t have to pay back) is at a disadvantage unless they have a deep-pocketed benefactor(s) to keep them going long enough to obtain their degree. I’m not sure in all cases but I don’t think getting a 4-year degree from a UC/CSU is worth it (depending on campus and major) if the student is going to be saddled with more than $20K in student loans to pay off after graduating. The recent graduate has too many needs in the months after college graduation, especially if they have to relocate for their first job. For example, the old beater they were driving in college might need to be replaced to hit the road, pulling a small u-haul. They may now be too old to qualify to be on their parent(s) healthplan anymore (Tricare upper limit is still age 23) … and the list goes on.
My kid(s) were/are fortunate in that they have a fee waiver (tuition only) and a scholarship of up to $7K year (if they attend summer term FT in addition to the academic year FT) as long as they maintain a 2.0 GPA. My youngest kid’s expenses were/are the greatest, of course, due to substantial fee hikes (campus and dorming fees) over the years. Last year (their freshman year living on campus) was ~$22K for which I paid ~$12K and this year (soph year, living off campus) will cost about ~$20K, for which I will pay ~$9K. I set aside $50K to get them to graduation (combo masters/bachelor degree in 4.5 to 5 yrs attending summers) and I expect it will be enough if there are no substantial rent hikes (split 4 ways) or campus fee hikes.
Without this aid, my kid(s) would have had to go to community college their first two years and attempt to transfer into university, which is NOT guaranteed. The “track record” of my kids’ community-college bound “homies” so far has been lackluster. I only know of ONE of my youngest’ HS friends who is on the deans list at CC and headed straight for SDSU (w/ guaranteed admission). The rest have dropped out or are only now taking one class at a time, due to all of their “overly-familiar” distractions.
As for my older kid(s), all their compadres from HS who stayed home to go to CC are still working for minimum wage locally or in parent-owned businesses and most of their female friend’s now have 2 or more children and no spouse. As far as their seriousness to attend and complete CC, that is a distant memory.
It doesn’t help that my kids’ local CC is right across the street from their HS :=0
I really feel it is best to get your kids out of dodge ASAP after HS graduation so they can grow up and learn to function on their own. From ages 18-25, hanging around in a parent(s) home with your straggling HS buds surrounding you (under the guise of “attending local CC”) is a road that surely leads to a dead end.
bearishgurl
ParticipantI’ve seen it over and over again where the dad buys a house for their baby’s mom to live in (once their baby is born) and pays their utilities until their maternity leave is over and the mom goes back to work. The rent-value of the house is right at or close to the value of the child support which would be ordered. This works very well for workplace romances in which the dad is currently married to someone else, has a “reputation” to keep up and wants to keep the whole sorry saga out of a custody battle and away from wagging tongues at work. The new mom signs a gag order to remain mum about the dad to co-workers and moves into the house. The kid eventually reaches the age of 18 at which time the dad steps in to help with college expenses. To do so, the mom voluntarily moves out of the house (or is legally evicted) and the dad rehabs a little and sells the house for a very handsome profit, giving him college funds for his (extra) kid and much more.
The dad’s “cuckolded” spouse at home, saddled with 2-4 kids of her own, goes along with the program, of course, to maintain her and her kids “lifestyle” … even taking care of the extra kid when he/she comes visiting.
Only one single mom that I know of moved out of the house the (married) dad provided her before their kid turned 18 …. to get married herself and move into her new spouse’s house. The rest stayed single and got free rent in a SFR in SD County for 18 years!
These machinations by the parents are a very popular form of “child support” among the movers and shakers of society … especially legal professionals. The dad ends up making a profit out of the deal (after owning the home and paying taxes and insurance on it long-term, of course). These deals are very, very common.
bearishgurl
Participant[quote=FlyerInHi]spd, to do what you want, you need money.
Teaching could be rewarding, but maybe not teach loser kids who won’t listen.
If you don’t work and save, then your kids won’t have anything. Are you sure you want them to go to state schools and then fend for themselves afterwards? . . . [/quote]
Ahem …. brian, there’s nothing wrong with “state schools.” My kid(s) who graduated from them (4-year schools) are doing just fine …. to the tune of $120K to $140K annually, AFAIK. They’re doing better in life than I ever did. Students who graduate from CA “state schools” with a marketable degree can and should “fend for themselves.” That’s what I did (with a limited education) from age 17 forward and that’s what every able-bodied adult with sound mind should do!
You’re “fear-mongering” here and I don’t think that’s going to come off too well to the parent-masses reading your post. The UC and the CSU are the best in the country at what they do for the masses of young people in this state …. for different reasons.
bearishgurl
Participant[quote=FlyerInHi]i think that dads get their wages garnished for child support. Bearishgurl should chime in on this topic. Maybe she knows.
Can you give birth and not list the father? I doubt a woman would not identify the father of her child if only to have him by the balls.[/quote]
The mom can name anyone she wants on her kid’s birth certificate but if she later files for TANF (cash welfare aid), the dad she names on it is going to be sued for CS by the gubment (for “aid reimbursement”). If he knows he’s not the dad (or suspects he is not, whether currently for formerly married to the mom … or not), he can demand a paternity test. It’s pure folly for the mom to lie about the dad’s identity to her aid worker and potentially lose benefits or in the worst case, be charged with welfare fraud.
I don’t know how much (if any) cash aid is actually withheld from the mom (or limited in duration paid to the mom) if the person she named to the aid agency as her kid(s) father turned out not to be. It could have been an innocent mistake. The mom would likely have to come up with a different name for the father (and age, location and SSN if she knows it) for the agency to track down.
I don’t think applicants for cash aid can easily proffer a fake identity for their kid’s dad to their aid agency. The aid workers likely have ways of determining if the father’s identity offered to them by the applicant is that of a real person. They can do this while the applicant waits in another room.
The only exception to the non-custodial parent being immediately sued by the aid agency for CS upon an aid application being filed by the custodial parent is if the applicant (“mom” in this case) comes in to the aid office to file for benefits with her kid(s) father’s death certificate or proof that he is currently incarcerated or a patient in a long-term rehabilitation facility. In the latter two instances, the agency may wait for a period of months or years to establish child support orders for the non-custodial parent (if the kids in question are still minors at that time).
A single mom who has been trying mightily to keep her kid(s) from having any relationship with their dad(s) would be well-advised never to file for TANF cash aid. Once an assumed dad is served with CS papers by the gubment, he can immediately file for his time-share and custody share of the child(ren) whom he acknowledges are his and also file to obtain court orders to share the children with the mom thereby lessening his exposure to CS.
If the person sued for CS didn’t already know he had a child with the applicant, now he does and he is free to file to enforce all his rights to that child after paternity is established.
bearishgurl
Participant[quote=BoomerAang]There is the phrase “if you have to ask, you can’t afford it.”
Well, technically you can at that salary. If I were in your situation, I would be maxing that 401k and working that Roth in order to reduce the taxes instead of looking at such a new toy.
Assuming you have all the space for the toys, that’s a lot of scratch for a vehicle you would be hardly driving. Would you be riding a lot less after getting the is-f? Would you even be tracking it?
You can spend a lot less cash on an older toy car if you are hardly putting miles on it. Most of the depreciation would already hit and you can squeeze out a lot more years at the low mileage you drive. There are a lot of reliable options out there. You can get a cheaper Porsche 996, a couple year old Lexus sc, an Infiniti g37 coupe, a German roadster (z4, slk).[/quote]
I agree with BoomerAang. There are a lot of luxury cars out there of all stripes which are even 15+ years old but have been continuously garaged and even have extensive service records.
The problem is actually finding one of these for sale by a private party. It takes a lot more looking (and wasting time and gas “shopping” at private-party listings) than it does to just roll onto a dealer lot and buy a washed and detailed CPO with a one-year warranty in <1 hour.
The reward comes when you are finally able to buy a great used vehicle (even a lower-mileage one) for $5K-$15K. A lot of people don't seem to want to bother with this type of car-buying expedition because it can be labor intensive for the buyer and there is no "instant gratification."
bearishgurl
ParticipantOh, and I know people with both kinds of “low-income” phones and with the low-income landline phone, which a lot of senior citizens have, it is considered “long distance” to dial the 858 area code from a 619 home area code. Just like the “old days,” that call will trigger a .15 minute charge.
And this “scammer-mom” has no earned income (she’s ineligible for the EIC) and may not even owe any tax if she claims “single” on her tax return at her stated income. As a matter of fact, if SSD is her only income, she’s not even required to file a tax return (any Pigg correct me if I’m wrong here). So there is no reason why she would need to claim any kids. If the dad has earned income, he should claim both kids and he may be eligible for the EIC if his income is low enough. But since he bought a house, it probably isn’t but he can still benefit from claiming the kids where the mom can’t. If the mom claimed single on her tax return, she could qualify for an Obamacare subsidy on her income but if she isn’t willing or able to pay anything towards the monthly premium out-of-pocket, she is likely going to get a Silver 87 regional HMO with a very limited network or a Bronze plan where the out-of-pocket expenses are high.
She’s better off on Medi-Cal, imho.
bearishgurl
ParticipantIf this hypothetical “mom” who can successfully “work the system” is not accepting TANF, then the gubment will not try establish paternity and/or summon the dad to court to establish child support (for “aid reimbursement”). Accepting Federal food aid in the form of an EBT card (fka “food stamps”) does not trigger “aid reimbursement.” Married or unmarried parents living together can avail themselves of EBT cards, Section 8 and TANF if they are eligible.
I don’t see how the mom can be a FT student and be 100% mentally or physically disabled at the same time but perhaps the two gubment databases (Federal student aid and the SSD system) do not “talk” to each other. Her child care at school is not “free” unless she is on TANF (if she was on TANF, the kids’ dad would have already been sued for child support by the gubment). So, she (or the dad) has to pay to have any young kids watched while she is in class (unless he can watch them).
Utilities are NEVER FREE, folks! A low-income cell phone service (NOT smartphone) is $18.31 mo, I believe, and a low income landline phone is about $8.31 mo (with a .15 min charge for long-distance). Low income households get utilities (gas and elec) at a 20% discount and that is FAR from “free.” Water and sewer are mandated charges and are not discounted. It is possible that this scamming mom’s LL (the dad?) pays her water and sewer bill. She doesn’t live within 100 miles of the coast and probably not in CA at all if her Section 8 award is $900 for a 3-bdrm home and she pays nothing out of her pocket for rent!. She rents the kids’ dad’s home in KS … or if it is actually in CA, the kid’s dad bought a smallish older home in Delhi (Merced County) situated among a horsefly breeding ground outside a dusty avocado grove or same in Lodi (adjacent to the rumbling SR-99 and freight train tracks).
If the dad is actually providing her and the kids a “decent” ($350K+) 3 br home in CA for the mom and kids to live in exchange for the mom’s $900 mo section 8 award ONLY and the home should actually rent for $1900 mo, then that $1000 month savings off the market rent would be considered a monthly child support payment by the court (as would the amounts of her paid water and sewer bills if the dad wouldn’t pay them for a “market-rate” tenant). The rent difference and any water/sewer bills he is covering every month would count towards any CS awarded to the mom if she should later decide to file for child support.
This is so because the dad could rent his property to a market-rate tenant for $1900 month but instead is using it to provide shelter for his kids for $900 month. This is legal, as is renting a property from a friend or relative using a Section 8 voucher and each single parent claiming one kid on their tax returns.
And with a $21,600 income and one kid, this mom (and her one kid she is claiming) are only eligible for Medi-Cal. Her income is too low to get an “Obamacare subsidy.”
If any of ya’ll want to try this life, more power to you! I hope this theoretical “scammer mom” makes it all the way thru college (considering her “total disability status”) and is able to graduate. This mom can’t have it both ways and is basically stuck and trapped until such time as she graduates college and gets a good job in spite of her “disability” … or both kids leave home … whichever happens first.
bearishgurl
Participant[quote=moneymaker]Buy it if you have a place to park it, and keep your gas tanks full on the 2 bikes, it keeps condensation and crud out of the tanks.[/quote]Absolutely. Buy it only if you have off-street parking for it, kev, preferably in a garage but at the very least, a carport.
bearishgurl
Participant[quote=FlyerInHi] . . . My young cousin is very smart but always a slacker. He graduated from engineering school then went to work chopping wood on a farm in Northern California. That caused a lot of scolding from his dad.
He then got married and is now working for a university, making 1/3 what he could in Silicon Valley. But he bikes 3 miles to work everyday.
Lucky for him, he married a girl with a large trust fund (but modest earthy-crunchy tastes who likes guys like him) so they now have a cool, paid-off mid-century split-level (before that he was living in an old house with roommates). His salary takes care of all their needs since they have no mortgage, plus they have funds to travel around and enjoy.Dad keeps his mouth shut because the son is now rich. But had he married someone with nothing, he could easily have been poor with kids.
I’m telling you, money makes a huge difference in how people perceive you and deal with you. Not that easy to leave the rat race.[/quote]
Your cousin married well, brian. His spouse isn’t ostentatious enough to go thru her trust fund and that is very smart. He can always apply for an engineering job in the future if he wishes as he will never lose what is in his brain. Your cousin is only “rich” by proxy. If he ever splits from his spouse, whatever remains in her “trust fund” is her sole asset.
Nevertheless, I think it is great that they both have choices on how to live their lives at such a young age. I say bravo to that.
And I agree with your last paragraph as well, although I believe you can’t necessarily judge a book by its cover. My mom (now deceased) retired from Coors Brewery in CO. She told me that the two Coors sons (ages 40-50 at the time) came to work everyday in Levis 501’s, a colored T shirt, a plaid flannel shirt over that (with quilted lining in the winter) and in their hard hats and carrying black metal lunch buckets with plaid Thermoses inside. When they had meetings, they “dressed up” in placket polos with a Coors logo and polyester pants (in that era, lol). They worked on the line every day and lunched on long tables with the minions but were/are members of one of the wealthiest, most philanthropic families in CO.
I have several relatives who are multimillionaires in their own right who do not even own a flat-screen TV or smart phone. LOTS of truly “wealthy people” are not big consumers. So I disagree with you on this point.
October 18, 2015 at 8:00 PM in reply to: Uni Heights: 33 sales in 3 months –ave. of 100%”down”? #790414bearishgurl
ParticipantI don’t know the source of your “capture,” Balboa, but Uni Heights has some of the smallest and most poorly-configured lots in the city. Many (most?) of them are “substandard” (meaning <5000 sf in size).
The rent in there must be high enough to command an avg $549K sold price cuz I just don't see that many "end-users" buying in there, especially those with minor children (who need space to play).
I can't fathom that a buy-and-hold cash investor can do well enough on a rental there unless it is a 2-4 unit dwelling (or had a granny flat off the alley taking up the whole (postage-stamp) "backyard" of the main house.
Yes, I DO believe the claim that the 33 recent sales were "all cash." This is typical all over the county where there is a proliferation of SFRs listed at <=$550K. Looks like Uni Heights/Normal Heights have a "captive audience" of buyers due to their excellent close-in locations. Congrats on having $1200 month rent and I hope it continues for you!
bearishgurl
Participant[quote=paramount]Buy it. It’s a reliable car that will last a long time and enjoyable to drive.
In the meantime, if your not already start looking into working at a defense contractor.[/quote]
This is good advice, kev 🙂
bearishgurl
Participantkev, if I am reading your OP correctly, you only live off $2200 to 2300 month on your $135K gross income ($26,400 to $27,600 annually). Your rent must be very reasonable. I live alone and have never been able to do that on my ~$45K income. My best month (expense-wise) was $2750 and that was a month where I had no (bimonthly) water/sewer bill and BEFORE Obamacare came into the picture. However, I am a homeowner with all the attendant expenses that go with that dubious honor :=0.
I love the Lexus F-Sports (mainly their looks and the fact that they have an 8-spd transmission with paddle shifters) :=) However, if I ever bought one, it would be the RX. The IS is quite small and I haven’t looked but I’m sure its “trunk” is useless. I’m not sure it needs premium gas (the 2015 RX doesn’t) and I can’t imagine that an oil change for it costs $100. I could see $50 because the price of full synthetic oil has gone up a bit in recent years. The 2014 CPO sounds like a very fair deal if you really want an IS. You mentioned you would keep the Lexus for 15 years. If truth be told, it will very likely last more than 25 years or >300K miles, especially at the 9600 typical miles per year you state you would drive it (800 miles per month) before needing any major work on its engine or transmission. Of course, the years you take road trips with the vehicle, your mileage could easily go over 12K. This is all assuming that you maintain the vehicle properly, including replacing its timing belt and water pump every 90-100K miles (a pricey repair). And if you’re not going to get an AWD model, stay off rutted dirt roads, etc, which will tear up your CV boots, over and over. (Learned this lesson the hard way … my next vehicle will be an AWD/4WD :=0)
Seriously, if you like to ski or go hiking in the mtns, I would get an AWD RX (new or used) if I were you, unless your existing pickup is a 4WD model.
I don’t see any reason why you shouldn’t get a passenger car (or “crossover”), since you don’t have one. Your “girlfriend” can mind her own finances and choose her own vehicles. The Lexus is a great choice. Toyota products (new or used) are the most reliable vehicles in the world, IMO. I’ve owned 9 of them in my lifetime and have no regrets, whatsoever.
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