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bearishgurl
Participant[quote=The-Shoveler]If your paying that much, more than likely for most people it pays for one parent to stay home (at least until they are school age).
At least it’s a write off.[/quote]That “writeoff” has limitations on how much you can claim, and, as I recall, the higher your household AGI, the less you can write off.
https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/i2441.pdf
It’s very possible that there are cheaper home-based daycare options available to yamashi but for whatever reason, they decided not to pursue them.
I had my kids in home-based daycare before they went to pre-K.
Participant[quote=skerzz][quote=FlyerInHi]From what I understand, $4,000 for 3 kids is about right.
$3,000 daycare and private preschool expenses will go away after the kids get older.
What’s wrong with spending money on your kids if you can afford it?
Nothing wrong with aiming high. Piano and language school are wonderful for kids. They learn best at a young age.
Why do you keep on pushing CSU? it’s the path to mediocrity. For example, CSU path won’t allow one to become a federal judge or supreme court justice.[/quote]
We had one child (1 year old) in a day care and the cost was $1,650/month. I agree that 3 kids for $4K month is about right (not overly expensive) for workweek care (6AM -6PM care, as needed , 5 days a week). Assuming 8 hours of care is provided per day (could be up to 12), that’s approx 480 hours of service per month (3 kids x 8 hours x 20 days) or roughly $8.33 per hour. Pretty reasonable when you consider that it costs about half that to put your dog in “doggy day care” for a day or what it costs per hour to hire a gardener to maintain your lawn. With our second child, we found it cheaper (and more convenient) to hire a live-in nanny that not only watches the kids, but also runs errands/performs house keeping duties.
I disagree that CSU is a path to mediocrity. My situation isn’t uncommon in my profession — I used my “mediocre” 4-year CSU education to gain employment at one of the largest international CPA Firms. I get a slight chuckle knowing my “cheap” CSU education landed me the same job as some of my peers that loaded up on student loan debt while getting educated at the more “expensive/elite” universities (USC, USD, etc.). This experience may be unique to my industry, but definitely proves CSU education is not always a guaranteed path to mediocrity.[/quote]Thank you for posting this, skerzz. My youngest kid is currently at a CSU majoring in Business Admin – Accounting Option. ALL eight of the CSU business disciplines are worth majoring in, with finance and accounting the most “lucrative” majors, IMO.
Not sure you read this whole thread, but one of yamashi’s 3 kids is in school most of the day. He stated he is paying $3000 month for daycare for 2 kids. The other $1000 month is for “extracurricular activities” for the school-age child.
I have a longtime “doggy daycare provider” which I pay $25 for each “overnight.” She has regular “daycare clients” but I’ve never taken my dog to her unless I’m leaving town and my dog will live with her while I’m gone. So I don’t know how much she charges for Doggy Day Care.
Participant[quote=yamashi1][quote=bearishgurl][quote=yamashi1][quote=bearishgurl]A little “food for thought” here. For $45-$48K per year (a little less than what you are paying now for young kids’ care and activities), you can currently send TWO kids to CSU (different campuses) in URBAN cities in CA (LA and SF bay area) WITHOUT any financial aid!…[/quote]
I put enough money into their 529 plans each month to cover about that much per year in today’s dollars for them when they get older (assuming 3-5% compounded appreciation). Both grandparents have also set aside some money. Hopefully they don’t need it. I told them if they can get a free ride or other assistance, then that money is for them to keep.[/quote] Down the road, you could invest $600-$800 per course on 6-8 week SAT prep courses. THAT’s where the “rubber meets the road” in a child’s life. College admission boards DON’T CARE what your kid did in any grade before grade 9.[/quote]I will do that if they want to, but right now I just want my kids to be well rounded and be able to do things they enjoy. I want my girls to grow up with self confidence and strong self esteem. I feel that if they start young with this, then it will go with them throughout the rest of their lives. I try to also instill values like grit and tenacity so that they don’t give up easily and find ways to get around barriers. I’m not teaching them SAT stuff at this age. I’m teaching them values.[/quote]yamashi, I just saw this long post and cleaned up the hyperlinks so it is readable.
Individual and team athletics and performing arts (vocals, dance and theater) develop the attributes you are seeking in your kids. All the better if they can actually get the experience of traveling (out of their “home turf”) while performing. I will say that even if I was initially opposed to show choir and it didn’t help my kids get into college, it DID instill tons of self-confidence in them and also taught them “presentation” (even though “exaggerated” for the stage). Just something to think about here … your kid(s) could eventually “audition” for a part in their school play. At least your oldest can start off with dance instruction now. You can get a discount on the 2nd and 3rd classes after paying the full monthly fee for the first class (ex ballet, tap, hip-hop, modern). Then continue dance instruction but get voice lessons while she is still in middle school (in preparation to audition for a HS show choir). The one drawback is that a few weeks per year, show-choir duties can take up to 44 hours per week of your kid’s time (incl travel time), the organization frequently excuses them from class and they have to do their schoolwork on the bus.
http://www.showchoir.com/events/event.php?id=1790
It might be interesting to see early on if your oldest likes dance. Theater shoes are part of the basic uniform for girls in show choir and tap and jazz/modern shoes are required in many show choir numbers so your kid needs to have a dance background to qualify, especially to appear in soloist and small group appearances.
If you will be hell bent on coaching and coercing your kids throughout HS to qualify to apply to Stanford, participating in show choir is probably not a good idea :=0
Participantyamashi, I’m not necessarily “Pro CSU.” Yes, it is a great system compared to other state university systems and has 23 campuses to choose from with varying program selection and which are located very diverse locations.
My kids didn’t take the right “curriculum” in HS to get admitted to the UC system so didn’t even apply. They were too busy “having fun.”
Participant[quote=yamashi][quote=bearishgurl]
Lol, shoveler. I suspect he spends it on private school. If not, then “finishing school.” Umm, CA public HS’s (no, not even BHHS) aren’t exactly capable of turning out the typical graduate who knows how to walk it, talk it and groom it for the business world :=0I’ve depended upon my kids’ Greek organizations to be their “finishing school” and so far, so good. This experience has also paved the way for being selected for their first jobs thru the networking they were exposed to while college-student members of their respective organizations. And no way were/are their annual dues anywhere near $4000 yr. They’re more like $1K per year, max (which my kids paid/pay with earnings from their PT jobs).[/quote]
Not sure what the hoopla is here. You asked some questions, and I gave you some personal answers to what it is like to be a millennial. I gave you my going rates to have someone watch a baby and a girl all day. You continue to argue that it’s too much, but that’s what I have to pay until I can get them to public school. It’s just what it is.[/quote]For much less than $3K a month, you can hire a young, certified “au-pair” from Sweden who is in the US legally. He/she will live in your spare bedroom, prepare your meals (incl having dinner ready when you arrive home from work), take your kids to all their lessons during the biz day, pick up your kid(s) from school (or walk them home), take care of your baby at least 50 hrs per week, and even do lite housework and laundry!
$3K month is way too much to pay for child care for two kids, imho, esp since you say you have a “flexible schedule” and you have one kid in school all day.
Participant[quote=yamashi][quote=BG]
The Regents/UC admission board doesn’t care about extracurricular activities in HS, either. Not a whit. An applicant’s highest SAT score plus HS GPA is the name of the game. And it doesn’t help that many thousands of deep-pocketed foreign applicants who are willing to pay the “full ride” will be his kids’ “competition.”It’s a crapshoot out there. [/quote]
This is false for UC Berkeley at least. My longtime friend is on the admissions over there. That was probably more the name of the game before, but now kids have to differentiate themselves even more from competition. They want the smartest, leader with a good heart, cares about the environment, plays 3 sports, concert pianist, and good speaker.[/quote]yamashi, at current direction the UC is headed in (and has been headed in for the last few years), do you think all of that is going to matter to the UC Admissions Board ten years from now when your oldest is on pins and needles after applying for eight campuses (choices 1 thru 8) wondering where he/she will end up (if anywhere) and wondering if they should have simultaneously applied to 6-8 CSU campuses as well (just to be on the “safe” side)? Of course, this is assuming that he/she is qualified to apply to both systems.
Participant[quote=FlyerInHi]BG, I don’t think it’s being obstinate to spend money on education. Those are the going rates. It’s unfortunate that we don’t have public preschool. But the costs are what they are. . . [/quote]The way it was described here, the money was not all spent on “education.” Not sure how you’re reading yamashi’s post but I read that the bulk of it was spent on daycare, after-school care and extracurricular activities.
And we DO have publicly subsidized preschool that has been in place for at least 30 years. It’s called “Head Start” but based upon yamashi’s posts, his family likely can’t qualify for it.
Participant[quote=The-Shoveler]Our Software Development manager probably spends that much on his kids as well but he lives in Beverly Hills.
I guess if you have a home worth maybe 5-10 Mil it’s kind of expected.[/quote]
Lol, shoveler. I suspect he spends it on private school. If not, then “finishing school.” Umm, CA public HS’s (no, not even BHHS) aren’t exactly capable of turning out the typical graduate who knows how to walk it, talk it and groom it for the business world :=0
I’ve depended upon my kids’ Greek organizations to be their “finishing school” and so far, so good. This experience has also paved the way for being selected for their first jobs thru the networking they were exposed to while college-student members of their respective organizations. And no way were/are their annual dues anywhere near $4000 yr. They’re more like $1K per year, max (which my kids paid/pay with earnings from their PT jobs).
Participant[quote=scaredyclassic]Except for fear of the future, lately I think it’s best to consume and give money now. It’s not going to be more fun in the future. Help from my folks would’ve been much more useful 20 years ago when my kids were little. Now, it’s not really needed….[/quote]Yeah, but back then, you probably would have spent it on diapers, formula and home daycare, NOT $400 mo “Saturday school,” lol …
I know how you can get your kid into “Saturday school” for free. Just make sure they have one or more “unexcused absences” for any period of the day before the end of the semester. They can get one free four-hour “Saturday school” session for every 1-4 unexcused absences …. depending on how much time there is left until the end of the semester, lol :=0
Participant[quote=FlyerInHi][quote=bearishgurl] I recently attended a fundraiser on a CSU campus put on by my youngest kid’s Greek organization. There were a few “movers and shakers” present … ALL “alumni” and local philanthropists. I can assure you that NONE of them have had “mediocre” careers or lives.[/quote]
There are “movers and shakers” at fundraisers for Father Joe’s Village also.[/quote]How do you know if any of them graduated from a CSU??
Participant[quote=FlyerInHi]Like Bernie Sanders said, university education is now an extension of High School. The bar has been raised.
There are plenty of paths to “success” but if kids are smart, why not give them “the best”, if you can afford it.
If you can afford it, what are you saving the money for? To buy big trucks and expensive toys like your brethren in TX and OK, do?[/quote]You’re just being obstinate, FIH. People with young kids today have NO IDEA how much college is going to cost them 10-15 years hence. Nor do they know how much rents will be in the locale of the campus their kid is admitted to (which may but very likely will NOT be their “1st or 2nd choice” campus). It’s scary!
The BIG money spent on kids should be spent where it counts and that is college prep and college (or vocational school, as the case may be). It wasn’t my idea for my kids to be in show choir. I was against it and all the traveling expense (over and above the exorbitantly expensive costumes they had to buy/rent) because I KNEW CA public university systems would not credit them for this experience in the admissions process nor would the three out-of-state campuses give them credit for it (for which they were guaranteed copious financial aid but didn’t end up applying to). I didn’t have any say in the matter and was “railroaded” into it. Aside from the in-state (mostly by school bus) cities my kids frequently visited for show choir, their performance schedule also took them (by air) to national “competition” shows in Boston, Manhattan (NYC), Chicago and Honolulu, which of course, cost a lot of $$. There is also the 8th grade trip to pay for each kid (in our district it was Wash DC). And they all had braces on their teeth. It’s all expensive and I understand expensive. But kids actually remember what they did and learned at age 14 and up but NOT at age 2-5. At age 2-4, in particular, they need love, attention, stories and playtime, NOT drilled and grilled incessantly and forced to learn to read music and play piano or violin. (Not saying here that this is the case with yamashi’s kids). Kids this age are too young to even learn ballet, tap, jazz, hip-hop or martial arts. It’s crazymaking! Have you ever watched a Pre-Ballet show of 3-year olds twirling around on stage? They have absolutely no idea what they’re doing and it’s hilarious!
When I was 19, I “retired” from my amateur athletic “career” and obtained certification to judge local gymnastic meets. I got a job teaching tumbling at the local YMCA and they would not even allow kids younger than five in my classes (we used a spotting belt and the student had to understand our instructions implicitly). After the first 6-8 week session, the Y decided the beginning tumbling students had to be 6 to be in my class. Even that age is marginal to begin learning the discipline that is expected of them and what they need to do to even acquire basic skills. Little kid’s brains aren’t ready for all the stuff parents today want to try to cram into them, imho.
Participant[quote=scaredyclassic]Hell I just realized I’m spending a grand a year on piano lessons. . . .[/quote]That’s a reasonable $83 month. Does the piano teacher come to your home to teach your kid 2-4x per month for that, scaredy?
edit, I just read you take him to the piano teacher’s house …. It’s still reasonable for 3-4 lessons per month.
Participant[quote=FlyerInHi]. . . Why do you keep on pushing CSU? it’s the path to mediocrity.[/quote] Ummm, no. I recently attended a fundraiser on a CSU campus put on by my youngest kid’s Greek organization. There were a few “movers and shakers” present … ALL “alumni” and local philanthropists. I can assure you that NONE of them have had “mediocre” careers or lives.
[quote=FlyerInHi] For example, CSU path won’t allow one to become a federal judge or supreme court justice.[/quote] Only 6 out of the 10 CA public university campuses (UC’s) in the state have have law schools plus one “affiliate” (Hastings). One has to be a practicing lawyer for a period of time (preferably 20+ years) before being appointed to a state or federal judgeship. Those lawyers who eventually become judges are likely .00001 of all lawyers in the country, maybe even less. This is a ludicrous argument because even graduation from one of these UC law schools (even the “flagship” schools of Boalt Hall [Cal] and UCLA) cannot even guarantee the candidate a successful passing of the State Bar exam, much less obtain a judgeship position in the future :=0
Participant[quote=FlyerInHi]From what I understand, $4,000 for 3 kids is about right.
$3,000 daycare and private preschool expenses will go away after the kids get older. . . . [/quote]Um, FIH, one of the kids is presumably in school most of the day.
You don’t have any kids, right? I think you would do well to poll the Piggs on this, lol ….
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