Parents: do kids learn about $$$ in school?

[jennyo]

“However, I NEVER got myself in the kind of shithole you both appear to have. Maybe it was because I paid my way through college? Maybe it was because I worked from the time I was 15? Maybe it’s because my dad died when I was 18 and I knew that no support whatsoever was forthcoming from my mom if I screwed up?”

Or maybe it was because someone taught you about finances? People aren’t born knowing this stuff, so someone must have along the way. That did not happen in my life. I also paid my way through college, working crap jobs the entire time. And I am by no means the only person I know who screwed up with credit card debt. The only good thing about it is that it happened when I was relatively young and I learned from the experience.

[Coronita]

dharmagirl,

You are absolutely right that the difference is now kids feel ENTITLED to this stuff! It baffles me. That story about $28 shampoo epitomizes the issue.

I remember that when we moved into our neighborhood about 5 years ago, we were introduced to some neighbors and their 15-year-old son, and I said something like, "oh, great, it's good to know that there's a teenager in the neighborhood…maybe we can hire you to water our plants and pick up the mail when we go away." This suggestion was met with complete silence and a blank stare, and when I looked back on the conversation, I felt so stupid and out of touch! I realized that this kid has no intention of ever doing a menial job like that, nor do many kids his age.

I hate to keep saying, "when I was a kid…", but WHEN I WAS A KID, I would've tripped over both my sisters trying to get a job like bringing in the mail for the neighbors or watering plants. Anything like that was great for making a few easy bucks! This kid, who now at age 20 drives a new SUV (that mom and dad probably bought for him), still probably doesn't stoop so low as to have some silly summer job, making his own money, and why would he when it's handed to him by mom and dad, plus he can get whatever else he wants on his (or perhaps their) credit cards.

When did everything become so out of whack?

 

….When parents in places like CarmelValley, DelMar, RSF, etc started buying their K-6 the latest cell phones because "they need it in case of emergencies" , educationers started proposing each K-6 bring in a laptop to school because "they need it to learn better" (http://www.nbcsandiego.com/news/3371420/detail.html), and kids started demanding the $200 pair basketball shoes because they "needed them to be a better athlete", and kids in high school ended up driving cars nicer than the faculty because they "needed it for safety,etc"

Nothing wrong with that, except most of the "needed items" parents both there kids, and kids just assumed it would be there. Parents are pretty much guilty of this. I was at a Radio Shack in CV awhile ago. A 12 year old brat was whining about how he needed a new phone, and his mom was there picking out a phone. Not that the kid's existing phone had any problems. Heck, it had more bells and whistles than my phone.

What I don't understand is why kids these days feel like they need to be texting all the time. The only reason why I have a crackberry is because I have to carry one for work, and trust me, I dodged the electronic dog leash that my employer eventually gave me as long as I possibly could.

And the laptop thing by the CV school district. WTF?

I mean, yeah I guess if you want to teach your kids to not know how do basic math, buy the kid a calculator. I guess extending this further, why bother teaching your kids proper spelling and grammar, when they can using Microsoft Word's auto-spell-correcter an auto-grammar correcter to do it? Heck, you don't even need to run the spell/grammar checker anymore. MSWord does if for you automatically now.

 

 BTW: my two year old figured out how to rip off the keys from my laptop, when she's playing with elmo online.  I'm guilty as charged.

 

[img_assist|nid=5962|title=selfportrait|desc=|link=node|align=left|width=100|height=80]

—– Sour grapes for everyone!

[Coronita]

dharmagirl,

You are absolutely right that the difference is now kids feel ENTITLED to this stuff! It baffles me. That story about $28 shampoo epitomizes the issue.

I remember that when we moved into our neighborhood about 5 years ago, we were introduced to some neighbors and their 15-year-old son, and I said something like, "oh, great, it's good to know that there's a teenager in the neighborhood…maybe we can hire you to water our plants and pick up the mail when we go away." This suggestion was met with complete silence and a blank stare, and when I looked back on the conversation, I felt so stupid and out of touch! I realized that this kid has no intention of ever doing a menial job like that, nor do many kids his age.

I hate to keep saying, "when I was a kid…", but WHEN I WAS A KID, I would've tripped over both my sisters trying to get a job like bringing in the mail for the neighbors or watering plants. Anything like that was great for making a few easy bucks! This kid, who now at age 20 drives a new SUV (that mom and dad probably bought for him), still probably doesn't stoop so low as to have some silly summer job, making his own money, and why would he when it's handed to him by mom and dad, plus he can get whatever else he wants on his (or perhaps their) credit cards.

When did everything become so out of whack?

 

….When parents in places like CarmelValley, DelMar, RSF, etc started buying their K-6 the latest cell phones because "they need it in case of emergencies" , educationers started proposing each K-6 bring in a laptop to school because "they need it to learn better" (http://www.nbcsandiego.com/news/3371420/detail.html), and kids started demanding the $200 pair basketball shoes because they "needed them to be a better athlete", and kids in high school ended up driving cars nicer than the faculty because they "needed it for safety,etc"

Nothing wrong with that, except most of the "needed items" parents both there kids, and kids just assumed it would be there. Parents are pretty much guilty of this. I was at a Radio Shack in CV awhile ago. A 12 year old brat was whining about how he needed a new phone, and his mom was there picking out a phone. Not that the kid's existing phone had any problems. Heck, it had more bells and whistles than my phone.

What I don't understand is why kids these days feel like they need to be texting all the time. The only reason why I have a crackberry is because I have to carry one for work, and trust me, I dodged the electronic dog leash that my employer eventually gave me as long as I possibly could.

And the laptop thing by the CV school district. WTF?

I mean, yeah I guess if you want to teach your kids to not know how do basic math, buy the kid a calculator. I guess extending this further, why bother teaching your kids proper spelling and grammar, when they can using Microsoft Word's auto-spell-correcter an auto-grammar correcter to do it? Heck, you don't even need to run the spell/grammar checker anymore. MSWord does if for you automatically now.

 

 BTW: my two year old figured out how to rip off the keys from my laptop, when she's playing with elmo online.  I'm guilty as charged.

 

[img_assist|nid=5962|title=selfportrait|desc=|link=node|align=left|width=100|height=80]

—– Sour grapes for everyone!

[Coronita]

dharmagirl,

You are absolutely right that the difference is now kids feel ENTITLED to this stuff! It baffles me. That story about $28 shampoo epitomizes the issue.

I remember that when we moved into our neighborhood about 5 years ago, we were introduced to some neighbors and their 15-year-old son, and I said something like, "oh, great, it's good to know that there's a teenager in the neighborhood…maybe we can hire you to water our plants and pick up the mail when we go away." This suggestion was met with complete silence and a blank stare, and when I looked back on the conversation, I felt so stupid and out of touch! I realized that this kid has no intention of ever doing a menial job like that, nor do many kids his age.

I hate to keep saying, "when I was a kid…", but WHEN I WAS A KID, I would've tripped over both my sisters trying to get a job like bringing in the mail for the neighbors or watering plants. Anything like that was great for making a few easy bucks! This kid, who now at age 20 drives a new SUV (that mom and dad probably bought for him), still probably doesn't stoop so low as to have some silly summer job, making his own money, and why would he when it's handed to him by mom and dad, plus he can get whatever else he wants on his (or perhaps their) credit cards.

When did everything become so out of whack?

 

….When parents in places like CarmelValley, DelMar, RSF, etc started buying their K-6 the latest cell phones because "they need it in case of emergencies" , educationers started proposing each K-6 bring in a laptop to school because "they need it to learn better" (http://www.nbcsandiego.com/news/3371420/detail.html), and kids started demanding the $200 pair basketball shoes because they "needed them to be a better athlete", and kids in high school ended up driving cars nicer than the faculty because they "needed it for safety,etc"

Nothing wrong with that, except most of the "needed items" parents both there kids, and kids just assumed it would be there. Parents are pretty much guilty of this. I was at a Radio Shack in CV awhile ago. A 12 year old brat was whining about how he needed a new phone, and his mom was there picking out a phone. Not that the kid's existing phone had any problems. Heck, it had more bells and whistles than my phone.

What I don't understand is why kids these days feel like they need to be texting all the time. The only reason why I have a crackberry is because I have to carry one for work, and trust me, I dodged the electronic dog leash that my employer eventually gave me as long as I possibly could.

And the laptop thing by the CV school district. WTF?

I mean, yeah I guess if you want to teach your kids to not know how do basic math, buy the kid a calculator. I guess extending this further, why bother teaching your kids proper spelling and grammar, when they can using Microsoft Word's auto-spell-correcter an auto-grammar correcter to do it? Heck, you don't even need to run the spell/grammar checker anymore. MSWord does if for you automatically now.

 

 BTW: my two year old figured out how to rip off the keys from my laptop, when she's playing with elmo online.  I'm guilty as charged.

 

[img_assist|nid=5962|title=selfportrait|desc=|link=node|align=left|width=100|height=80]

—– Sour grapes for everyone!

[Coronita]

dharmagirl,

You are absolutely right that the difference is now kids feel ENTITLED to this stuff! It baffles me. That story about $28 shampoo epitomizes the issue.

I remember that when we moved into our neighborhood about 5 years ago, we were introduced to some neighbors and their 15-year-old son, and I said something like, "oh, great, it's good to know that there's a teenager in the neighborhood…maybe we can hire you to water our plants and pick up the mail when we go away." This suggestion was met with complete silence and a blank stare, and when I looked back on the conversation, I felt so stupid and out of touch! I realized that this kid has no intention of ever doing a menial job like that, nor do many kids his age.

I hate to keep saying, "when I was a kid…", but WHEN I WAS A KID, I would've tripped over both my sisters trying to get a job like bringing in the mail for the neighbors or watering plants. Anything like that was great for making a few easy bucks! This kid, who now at age 20 drives a new SUV (that mom and dad probably bought for him), still probably doesn't stoop so low as to have some silly summer job, making his own money, and why would he when it's handed to him by mom and dad, plus he can get whatever else he wants on his (or perhaps their) credit cards.

When did everything become so out of whack?

 

….When parents in places like CarmelValley, DelMar, RSF, etc started buying their K-6 the latest cell phones because "they need it in case of emergencies" , educationers started proposing each K-6 bring in a laptop to school because "they need it to learn better" (http://www.nbcsandiego.com/news/3371420/detail.html), and kids started demanding the $200 pair basketball shoes because they "needed them to be a better athlete", and kids in high school ended up driving cars nicer than the faculty because they "needed it for safety,etc"

Nothing wrong with that, except most of the "needed items" parents both there kids, and kids just assumed it would be there. Parents are pretty much guilty of this. I was at a Radio Shack in CV awhile ago. A 12 year old brat was whining about how he needed a new phone, and his mom was there picking out a phone. Not that the kid's existing phone had any problems. Heck, it had more bells and whistles than my phone.

What I don't understand is why kids these days feel like they need to be texting all the time. The only reason why I have a crackberry is because I have to carry one for work, and trust me, I dodged the electronic dog leash that my employer eventually gave me as long as I possibly could.

And the laptop thing by the CV school district. WTF?

I mean, yeah I guess if you want to teach your kids to not know how do basic math, buy the kid a calculator. I guess extending this further, why bother teaching your kids proper spelling and grammar, when they can using Microsoft Word's auto-spell-correcter an auto-grammar correcter to do it? Heck, you don't even need to run the spell/grammar checker anymore. MSWord does if for you automatically now.

 

 BTW: my two year old figured out how to rip off the keys from my laptop, when she's playing with elmo online.  I'm guilty as charged.

 

[img_assist|nid=5962|title=selfportrait|desc=|link=node|align=left|width=100|height=80]

—– Sour grapes for everyone!

[Coronita]

dharmagirl,

You are absolutely right that the difference is now kids feel ENTITLED to this stuff! It baffles me. That story about $28 shampoo epitomizes the issue.

I remember that when we moved into our neighborhood about 5 years ago, we were introduced to some neighbors and their 15-year-old son, and I said something like, "oh, great, it's good to know that there's a teenager in the neighborhood…maybe we can hire you to water our plants and pick up the mail when we go away." This suggestion was met with complete silence and a blank stare, and when I looked back on the conversation, I felt so stupid and out of touch! I realized that this kid has no intention of ever doing a menial job like that, nor do many kids his age.

I hate to keep saying, "when I was a kid…", but WHEN I WAS A KID, I would've tripped over both my sisters trying to get a job like bringing in the mail for the neighbors or watering plants. Anything like that was great for making a few easy bucks! This kid, who now at age 20 drives a new SUV (that mom and dad probably bought for him), still probably doesn't stoop so low as to have some silly summer job, making his own money, and why would he when it's handed to him by mom and dad, plus he can get whatever else he wants on his (or perhaps their) credit cards.

When did everything become so out of whack?

 

….When parents in places like CarmelValley, DelMar, RSF, etc started buying their K-6 the latest cell phones because "they need it in case of emergencies" , educationers started proposing each K-6 bring in a laptop to school because "they need it to learn better" (http://www.nbcsandiego.com/news/3371420/detail.html), and kids started demanding the $200 pair basketball shoes because they "needed them to be a better athlete", and kids in high school ended up driving cars nicer than the faculty because they "needed it for safety,etc"

Nothing wrong with that, except most of the "needed items" parents both there kids, and kids just assumed it would be there. Parents are pretty much guilty of this. I was at a Radio Shack in CV awhile ago. A 12 year old brat was whining about how he needed a new phone, and his mom was there picking out a phone. Not that the kid's existing phone had any problems. Heck, it had more bells and whistles than my phone.

What I don't understand is why kids these days feel like they need to be texting all the time. The only reason why I have a crackberry is because I have to carry one for work, and trust me, I dodged the electronic dog leash that my employer eventually gave me as long as I possibly could.

And the laptop thing by the CV school district. WTF?

I mean, yeah I guess if you want to teach your kids to not know how do basic math, buy the kid a calculator. I guess extending this further, why bother teaching your kids proper spelling and grammar, when they can using Microsoft Word's auto-spell-correcter an auto-grammar correcter to do it? Heck, you don't even need to run the spell/grammar checker anymore. MSWord does if for you automatically now.

 

 BTW: my two year old figured out how to rip off the keys from my laptop, when she's playing with elmo online.  I'm guilty as charged.

 

[img_assist|nid=5962|title=selfportrait|desc=|link=node|align=left|width=100|height=80]

—– Sour grapes for everyone!

[carli]

FLU,

We live in Del Mar, and our kids don’t have that stuff. Yes, there’s tremendous pressure to buy, buy, buy, and have the latest and greatest stuff, but the pressure is only effective if we allow it to be. We do our best to ignore it and stay true to our own values and way of life. Obviously, we’re not immune to the pressure entirely (otherwise, this thread wouldn’t have hit home with me!)…it’s always a balancing act and a bit of a struggle.

For example, our 8th grader is mortified that she has the free flip phone that we got when we added her to our cellphone plan a year ago. Getting her the phone was more for our convenience than hers and there was no way we were going to actually spend money to get her a fancier phone than Verizon gave us for free. She also (horrors!) does not have a text plan…how old-fashioned of us! We will renegotiate that decision with her next year for high school, but for now, we don’t see the need for an 8th grader to be text messaging along with emailing and chatting on the phone…no, we’re not as mean as we sound, but we try to set our own boundaries. Believe it or not, she’s generally a happy, popular kid.

Still, we are out of the norm for our area and among her friends. We try to keep true to our beliefs, but we really don’t want to cop some holier-than-thou attitude about our way of parenting. It’s hard to understand how other parents don’t get the connection between giving their kids all this stuff and seeing that their kids later feel so entitled, but c’est la vie. The irony is that while these parents feel they are “giving” their kids so much, they are probably doing them a big disservice, the results of which will show up later when their kids are, at some point, forced to cope in the real world.

By the way, what is this thing with CV high schools expecting laptops? Sounds like something else that we’ll find out when our daughter attends next year!

[carli]

FLU,

We live in Del Mar, and our kids don’t have that stuff. Yes, there’s tremendous pressure to buy, buy, buy, and have the latest and greatest stuff, but the pressure is only effective if we allow it to be. We do our best to ignore it and stay true to our own values and way of life. Obviously, we’re not immune to the pressure entirely (otherwise, this thread wouldn’t have hit home with me!)…it’s always a balancing act and a bit of a struggle.

For example, our 8th grader is mortified that she has the free flip phone that we got when we added her to our cellphone plan a year ago. Getting her the phone was more for our convenience than hers and there was no way we were going to actually spend money to get her a fancier phone than Verizon gave us for free. She also (horrors!) does not have a text plan…how old-fashioned of us! We will renegotiate that decision with her next year for high school, but for now, we don’t see the need for an 8th grader to be text messaging along with emailing and chatting on the phone…no, we’re not as mean as we sound, but we try to set our own boundaries. Believe it or not, she’s generally a happy, popular kid.

Still, we are out of the norm for our area and among her friends. We try to keep true to our beliefs, but we really don’t want to cop some holier-than-thou attitude about our way of parenting. It’s hard to understand how other parents don’t get the connection between giving their kids all this stuff and seeing that their kids later feel so entitled, but c’est la vie. The irony is that while these parents feel they are “giving” their kids so much, they are probably doing them a big disservice, the results of which will show up later when their kids are, at some point, forced to cope in the real world.

By the way, what is this thing with CV high schools expecting laptops? Sounds like something else that we’ll find out when our daughter attends next year!

[carli]

FLU,

We live in Del Mar, and our kids don’t have that stuff. Yes, there’s tremendous pressure to buy, buy, buy, and have the latest and greatest stuff, but the pressure is only effective if we allow it to be. We do our best to ignore it and stay true to our own values and way of life. Obviously, we’re not immune to the pressure entirely (otherwise, this thread wouldn’t have hit home with me!)…it’s always a balancing act and a bit of a struggle.

For example, our 8th grader is mortified that she has the free flip phone that we got when we added her to our cellphone plan a year ago. Getting her the phone was more for our convenience than hers and there was no way we were going to actually spend money to get her a fancier phone than Verizon gave us for free. She also (horrors!) does not have a text plan…how old-fashioned of us! We will renegotiate that decision with her next year for high school, but for now, we don’t see the need for an 8th grader to be text messaging along with emailing and chatting on the phone…no, we’re not as mean as we sound, but we try to set our own boundaries. Believe it or not, she’s generally a happy, popular kid.

Still, we are out of the norm for our area and among her friends. We try to keep true to our beliefs, but we really don’t want to cop some holier-than-thou attitude about our way of parenting. It’s hard to understand how other parents don’t get the connection between giving their kids all this stuff and seeing that their kids later feel so entitled, but c’est la vie. The irony is that while these parents feel they are “giving” their kids so much, they are probably doing them a big disservice, the results of which will show up later when their kids are, at some point, forced to cope in the real world.

By the way, what is this thing with CV high schools expecting laptops? Sounds like something else that we’ll find out when our daughter attends next year!

[carli]

FLU,

We live in Del Mar, and our kids don’t have that stuff. Yes, there’s tremendous pressure to buy, buy, buy, and have the latest and greatest stuff, but the pressure is only effective if we allow it to be. We do our best to ignore it and stay true to our own values and way of life. Obviously, we’re not immune to the pressure entirely (otherwise, this thread wouldn’t have hit home with me!)…it’s always a balancing act and a bit of a struggle.

For example, our 8th grader is mortified that she has the free flip phone that we got when we added her to our cellphone plan a year ago. Getting her the phone was more for our convenience than hers and there was no way we were going to actually spend money to get her a fancier phone than Verizon gave us for free. She also (horrors!) does not have a text plan…how old-fashioned of us! We will renegotiate that decision with her next year for high school, but for now, we don’t see the need for an 8th grader to be text messaging along with emailing and chatting on the phone…no, we’re not as mean as we sound, but we try to set our own boundaries. Believe it or not, she’s generally a happy, popular kid.

Still, we are out of the norm for our area and among her friends. We try to keep true to our beliefs, but we really don’t want to cop some holier-than-thou attitude about our way of parenting. It’s hard to understand how other parents don’t get the connection between giving their kids all this stuff and seeing that their kids later feel so entitled, but c’est la vie. The irony is that while these parents feel they are “giving” their kids so much, they are probably doing them a big disservice, the results of which will show up later when their kids are, at some point, forced to cope in the real world.

By the way, what is this thing with CV high schools expecting laptops? Sounds like something else that we’ll find out when our daughter attends next year!

[carli]

FLU,

We live in Del Mar, and our kids don’t have that stuff. Yes, there’s tremendous pressure to buy, buy, buy, and have the latest and greatest stuff, but the pressure is only effective if we allow it to be. We do our best to ignore it and stay true to our own values and way of life. Obviously, we’re not immune to the pressure entirely (otherwise, this thread wouldn’t have hit home with me!)…it’s always a balancing act and a bit of a struggle.

For example, our 8th grader is mortified that she has the free flip phone that we got when we added her to our cellphone plan a year ago. Getting her the phone was more for our convenience than hers and there was no way we were going to actually spend money to get her a fancier phone than Verizon gave us for free. She also (horrors!) does not have a text plan…how old-fashioned of us! We will renegotiate that decision with her next year for high school, but for now, we don’t see the need for an 8th grader to be text messaging along with emailing and chatting on the phone…no, we’re not as mean as we sound, but we try to set our own boundaries. Believe it or not, she’s generally a happy, popular kid.

Still, we are out of the norm for our area and among her friends. We try to keep true to our beliefs, but we really don’t want to cop some holier-than-thou attitude about our way of parenting. It’s hard to understand how other parents don’t get the connection between giving their kids all this stuff and seeing that their kids later feel so entitled, but c’est la vie. The irony is that while these parents feel they are “giving” their kids so much, they are probably doing them a big disservice, the results of which will show up later when their kids are, at some point, forced to cope in the real world.

By the way, what is this thing with CV high schools expecting laptops? Sounds like something else that we’ll find out when our daughter attends next year!

[meadandale]

“Or maybe it was because someone taught you about finances? People aren’t born knowing this stuff, so someone must have along the way”

Nope. Dad was a fuck up and somehow my mom managed to raise 6 kids on what he didn’t piss away on get rich quick schemes. Our family never used credit cards and I never really had a savings account growing up (I did but there wasn’t more than a few hundred in it).

I guess wearing hand me downs and toughskins with the knees patched teaches you that having the “in” clothes isn’t all that important. I never had a polo shirt until I graduated college, I never had penny loafers when they were all the rage.

I grew up lower middle class and was never really taught much about money, mostly because we never really had any.

[meadandale]

“Or maybe it was because someone taught you about finances? People aren’t born knowing this stuff, so someone must have along the way”

Nope. Dad was a fuck up and somehow my mom managed to raise 6 kids on what he didn’t piss away on get rich quick schemes. Our family never used credit cards and I never really had a savings account growing up (I did but there wasn’t more than a few hundred in it).

I guess wearing hand me downs and toughskins with the knees patched teaches you that having the “in” clothes isn’t all that important. I never had a polo shirt until I graduated college, I never had penny loafers when they were all the rage.

I grew up lower middle class and was never really taught much about money, mostly because we never really had any.

[meadandale]

“Or maybe it was because someone taught you about finances? People aren’t born knowing this stuff, so someone must have along the way”

Nope. Dad was a fuck up and somehow my mom managed to raise 6 kids on what he didn’t piss away on get rich quick schemes. Our family never used credit cards and I never really had a savings account growing up (I did but there wasn’t more than a few hundred in it).

I guess wearing hand me downs and toughskins with the knees patched teaches you that having the “in” clothes isn’t all that important. I never had a polo shirt until I graduated college, I never had penny loafers when they were all the rage.

I grew up lower middle class and was never really taught much about money, mostly because we never really had any.

[meadandale]

“Or maybe it was because someone taught you about finances? People aren’t born knowing this stuff, so someone must have along the way”

Nope. Dad was a fuck up and somehow my mom managed to raise 6 kids on what he didn’t piss away on get rich quick schemes. Our family never used credit cards and I never really had a savings account growing up (I did but there wasn’t more than a few hundred in it).

I guess wearing hand me downs and toughskins with the knees patched teaches you that having the “in” clothes isn’t all that important. I never had a polo shirt until I graduated college, I never had penny loafers when they were all the rage.

I grew up lower middle class and was never really taught much about money, mostly because we never really had any.

[Author]

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