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FlyerInHi.
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November 17, 2014 at 12:54 PM #780140November 17, 2014 at 3:42 PM #780142
FlyerInHi
Guest[quote=zk]
[quote=FlyerInHi]Superior in upbringing
[/quote]Superior in upbringing? So a tidy person who was taught to be tidy and was sexually abused and is now a rapist or a pedophile is superior in upbringing to a person who grew up in a messy house and was taught to treat people right and is now messy but treats people well?
[/quote]I agree that we should judge a person as a whole. Untidiness by itself doesn’t make a person bad, but it lowers the overall score.
However, I still insist that, all else being equal, tidiness is better.
On this subject, I believe that your giving 97% and your wife only giving 3% clearly shows that it’s a non-negotiable item to her. I’m with your wife.. but I wouldn’t go as far as making guests walk around back and through the garage.
Also, I don’t thing we can throw out societal norms and start with a blank slate. There’d too much to throw out.
November 17, 2014 at 6:12 PM #780151bearishgurl
Participant[quote=FlyerInHi][quote=zk][quote=FlyerInHi] Superior in upbringing[/quote]Superior in upbringing? So a tidy person who was taught to be tidy and was sexually abused and is now a rapist or a pedophile is superior in upbringing to a person who grew up in a messy house and was taught to treat people right and is now messy but treats people well?[/quote]
I agree that we should judge a person as a whole. Untidiness by itself doesn’t make a person bad, but it lowers the overall score.
However, I still insist that, all else being equal, tidiness is better.
On this subject, I believe that your giving 97% and your wife only giving 3% clearly shows that it’s a non-negotiable item to her. I’m with your wife.. but I wouldn’t go as far as making guests walk around back and through the garage.
Also, I don’t thing we can throw out societal norms and start with a blank slate. There’d too much to throw out.[/quote]
“There’d (be) too much to throw out.” You got that part right, FIH.
Ahhh, I find this thread re-a-llly interesting. zk, you brought up some things here that indicate that YOU have your own issues that you are bringing here which have nothing to do with tidiness or cleanliness. zk, are you comparing yourself here to a pedophile or rapist who is “tidy?” What does being a pedophile or rapist have to do with tidiness?
Firstly, I’ll leave “tidiness” out of my discussion here as I’m not into rolling up my clothing in my drawers, etc. In addition, I … like millions of other Americans, have house pets and well know it is difficult, at best, to keep an entirely clean and tidy house 24/7 with pets living there. I’ve also had “friends,” relatives and neighbors in the past and present who are and were filthy people. In the case of my relatives, their houses were so filthy that I would not stay overnight there, sit on any of their furniture or use their bathrooms. In 90% of cases, their physical filthiness trait manifested itself into an inability to manage family finances (all the while having an adequate to GREAT income) due to overspending, hoarding brand-new unused items they purchased themselves, chronic gambling, smoking, drinking, partying, etc, etc, all the while attempting to raise their families. These behaviors undoubtedly lead to BK filings, foreclosure and the family having to go on aid in order to eat and subsist. Their children (now all grown) had chronic asthma and chronic bronchitis while growing up due to all the smoke and stale ashtrays all over the house, keeping them absent from school regularly. Cat litter boxes hadn’t been changed or cleaned in months and their cats relieved themselves throughout the home. Dirty dishes are piled to the ceiling on every kitchen counter (and in all the bdrms) and in the past, infant bottles and their paraphernalia had been “soaking” in greasy water in the kitchen for days. Laundry is piled to the ceiling and no one in the family ever has any clean underwear or socks. Carpets in the house need to be burned, and in some cases, maybe the entire house should be/have been burned down as well, lol ….
I felt “so sorry” for the kids who were never taught to do any household chores or to even make their beds and keep their own rooms clean. Naturally, these kids can’t wait to leave home at 18 years old (plus one minute) or even earlier if they can possibly live with a friend for awhile to finish HS. They often end up almost immediately “hooking up” with somebody so they can live cheaper on their own and then having their own kids while still a teen. Then you can well imagine a repeat of all of the above behaviors because these kids don’t know anything else. So yes, filthiness leads to all kinds of problems unrelated to cleanliness, especially if the filthy person is a parent. I agree with FIH in that this subset of the population lacks discipline, is very often borderline or clinically depressed and lacks respect for others’ property. An example is neighbors who move barely-running junk cars around the street over and over for YEARS (to keep them from getting towed) yet never drive them anywhere and have several feet high of rusty junk and more junk vehicles piled up in their driveways and front yards. Due to lack of respect for their neighbors, this type of person lacks empathy so possibly also suffers from NPD. Some of these people are literally spilling out of their houses, garages, lots and recycle and trash carts. Of course, when their trash carts are dumped weekly, their trash is never bundled correctly so spills and flies out on the street, sidewalk and neighbors’ lots. Their vehicles have more than a foot of trash on every floorboard. I could go on and on here but you get the drift. The filthy ones are very often the same people with judgment liens, NOD’s, NOS’s and BK filings on their record but NOT for lack of income or insufficient income but because they consciously and continually lived beyond their means for an extended period of time.
I believe filthiness is a character flaw which extends to all areas of life. In my experience, that character flaw goes hand in hand, not necessarily with criminal tendencies but with the filthy person’s level of motivation, reliability, perseverance and trustworthiness.
I’m not talking here about failing to roll your clothes properly to put in a drawer or failing to feather dust your lampshades and picture frames regularly. I’m talking about living in filth and FIH is correct in that many, many Americans do. I don’t have any respect at all for these kinds of people.
There was a recent discussion here about how “valuable” SAHP’s are to society. I do understand that there are some very good household managers out there but in my experience, I have seen more SAHP’s do little to nothing to “earn their keep” than ones that do (except spend money). This isn’t to negate in any way, shape or form that personal choice, but I just haven’t seen any really spectacular household mgrs who are SAHP’s. On the other hand, I’ve seen several GREAT household mgrs who had full time careers while raising children (that doesn’t mean they did everything themselves).
Yeah, I’m judgmental about this topic because I believe it’s deplorable and unconscionable to raise kids in filth when a bottle of ammonia costs 59 cents and rags are free (CPS agrees with me). If you need junk hauled off, there are very low cost ways to do that, too. Even if the family is low income, there are ways to “do poor right” as Blogstar stated in the “Ferguson” thread. Having a reasonably clean home and teaching kids how to clean is part of being a parent, no matter what the family income.
[quote=zk]Our home is super fresh and extremely neat and clean. We are proud to invite people over. But there are disadvantages to having a neat-freak wife:
We have a very large back yard with a bocce ball court, a covered patio, a built in bbq, an iron gazebo shaded by bougainvillea, a fire pit, a putting green, a horseshoe pit, a huge cabana with a 60 inch tv, a lawn big enough for croquet or badminton, and a 270 degree view. Perfect for entertaining 60 or 70 people. But she won’t have more than three couples and their kids over at a time. (She tries to keep it to two couples, but will allow three in a pinch.) Because it would freak her out to have the house that messy just between the time it got messy and when we finished cleaning up. And somebody might, god forbid, spill something on the carpet. Given the option, I’d take both large parties and some messiness rather than neither.
Also, when I have a poker game or a football draft at my house, everybody has to stay outside (in the cabana) except to use the bathroom. And they have to go around the house and through the garage to get there.
I managed to get permission to have a small super bowl party last year. Had about 20 or 25 people over. It took me a year to get permission, and I heard about it for a month after. Not doing that again.
So there are disadvantages. But, hey, to make a marriage work, you have to work together and compromise. I do most of the giving in this particular area, but she more than makes up for it in other areas.
So, I don’t see myself as lucky that my wife is neat. I see the advantages of it, but overall it’s not a benefit.[/quote]
WOW, zk, it looks like you may have dumped about $100K?? in your backyard so you could comfortably entertain your friends! If you don’t mind my asking, did that ~$100K come from your salary? Or maybe your spouse’s salary?? Is the property half yours (half yours and half your spouse’s)? At the time you were dumping big bucks into your BY, were you aware that your spouse would later insist on you only being able to entertain just six people at a time? Must all your guests be married or would your spouse approve a guest who was single?
And I’m wondering why you left the carpet in the house when you purchased it if you planned on entertaining large groups of people?
Having entertained at home a lot in the past myself (up to 240 people), I WELL KNOW how much work it is before, during and after the party. But for the life of me, I don’t know why one co-owner would be able to successfully prohibit the other co-owner from doing what they expected to do with their property at the time of purchase and the time of installing those subsequent (expensive) improvements.
[quote=zk]…In any case, a person’s value shouldn’t be measured by their intelligence, let alone their their tidiness or lack thereof.
Same with a tidy person. Maybe he’s tidy, but that doesn’t make him superior. It doesn’t even make him superior in discipline and personal habits. Maybe he cheats on his wife or can’t control his spending or doesn’t change the oil in his car.[/quote]
zk, I find it very telling that your sample “tidy person,” (above) is a male who cheats on his wife and/or can’t control his spending, etc. In essence, you’ve stated here that you are a lifelong messy person by upbringing and habit yet are now only a “tidy person” because you feel you have to be to keep your relationship together. Infidelity, inability to control spending and failing to change oil in one’s vehicle are actually equally shared traits of both genders, none of which has anything to do with being a clean or “tidy” person.
Might you yourself be struggling with both of these traits and so that’s why you used them in this discussion? Just wondering ….
I agree with FIH. Based upon your posts and your own admission, you’re giving 97% in your relationship. Hope you’re getting your money’s worth :=0
November 17, 2014 at 6:16 PM #780153scaredyclassic
ParticipantFor 51 years, ive seen myself as a cluttered, kind of sloppy person. It bugs my wife, but she lives with it, I guess. The story I’ve told myself is that’s just how I am, I don’t mind it, it generates creativity, other stuff. One concrete problem I had for many many years was not being able to find my wallet or keys, primarily because I would just drop things randomly and unthinkingly, mindlessly.
Reading that book made me want to try something else, and I can tell you, without judging one mode as better than another, that it is very interesting to try something new. And I love this. I love getting rid of things. I love having space around stuff. I like thinking about where im going to put things and having a place for stuff. I love pitching tons of crap. I just like it. Is this the rest of my life, progressively neater and more orderly? Well, maybe, I don’t know. Im a bingey kinda guy. It doesn’t seem like a horrible outcome to me. There’s worse things than being neat and organized. I think I’ll still be internally kinda messy, but as Im thinking now, it’s like a light went on. This is how I want to lvie from now on. I want things very orderly. I just do. I remember not caring, but now I care. I don’t think ic an go back! If you are cluttery and messy, I’d say that’s fine, but I’d encourage anyone thinking about the issue to take a looka t the book and give it a go. It might surprise you how pleasureable it is. For instance, I now take out and put away my coffee grinder each morning. I used to just leave it out. It takes a few more seconds, nothing really. And the counter looks nice! There’s so many little things like this. Maybe I’m slowly trying to wind up my affairs, over a few decades, but it is downright intoxicating to pitch old crap!
My mother is a very very orderly neat and organizaed person, and I am beginning to suspect all my self-proclaimed clutteriness is just rebellion against what she would want…
November 17, 2014 at 7:49 PM #780157zk
Participant[quote=bearishgurl]
Ahhh, I find this thread re-a-llly interesting. zk, you brought up some things here that indicate that YOU have your own issues that you are bringing here which have nothing to do with tidiness or cleanliness. zk, are you comparing yourself here to a pedophile or rapist who is “tidy?” What does being a pedophile or rapist have to do with tidiness?[/quote]
Wow. For the longest time, I thought you were pretty sharp, bg. But lately you’ve been posting nothing but scattershot, fire-from-the-hip, uninformed, off-the-point stupidity. Read Brian’s post, and then mine. Obviously I was countering Brian’s suggestion that a tidy person is superior in upbringing by bringing up a hypothetical person who was brought up to be tidy while simultaneously having a horrible upbringing. It’s not that complicated. But then, you’re not that smart.
November 17, 2014 at 8:07 PM #780158Participant[quote=zk][quote=bearishgurl]
Ahhh, I find this thread re-a-llly interesting. zk, you brought up some things here that indicate that YOU have your own issues that you are bringing here which have nothing to do with tidiness or cleanliness. zk, are you comparing yourself here to a pedophile or rapist who is “tidy?” What does being a pedophile or rapist have to do with tidiness?[/quote]
Wow. For the longest time, I thought you were pretty sharp, bg. But lately you’ve been posting nothing but scattershot, fire-from-the-hip, uninformed, off-the-point stupidity. Read Brian’s post, and then mine. Obviously I was countering Brian’s suggestion that a tidy person is superior in upbringing by bringing up a hypothetical person who was brought up to be tidy while simultaneously having a horrible upbringing. It’s not that complicated. But then, you’re not that smart.[/quote]
The issue, zk, is that you are correlating being “tidy” with criminal behavior. A person who possesses organizational skills and the motivation and perseverance to get things done (i.e. can properly manage their household) isn’t necessarily (or usually) a criminal, as you attest here. You’re bringing in lots of other criminal propensities which have nothing to do with being “tidy” or “clean.” Why you’re bringing these off-the-wall traits in here to compare with “messy people” is anybody’s guess.
What you’ve posted here shows that you not only were raised as a “messy person” (which is ok if you have the a partner who freely accepts that trait), but that you are on a very short leash at home.
If you are ok with that (after all you claim here that you’ve been through to get your property as you want it), then so am I. Far be it from me to judge the “tacit arrangement” you have with your “co-owner,” whether you are satisfied with it … or not.
November 17, 2014 at 8:13 PM #780160Participantnot a correlation. justa hypothetical.
if one states “all tidy people are superior”, then there need exist only one tidy pedophile to counter the initial proposition. there’s no correlation; just a hypothetical example to ounter a kind of absurd initial sweeping proposition.
November 17, 2014 at 8:15 PM #780161ParticipantI’m at work right now, and don’t have time to post much. But when I get home, I’m going to let you have it, bg. And you’re going to end up looking stupid and running away with your tail between your legs just like you did when we discussed “economic obsolescence.” I’m not sure why you keep trying, I’d have thought you’d have learned. Oh, I forgot. You’re not that smart.
November 17, 2014 at 9:09 PM #780162
Rich ToscanoKeymaster[quote=bearishgurl]The issue, zk, is that you are correlating being “tidy” with criminal behavior.”[/quote]
Uhm… what?
No, he’s not doing that at all. Did you read what he wrote, or his explanation of what he wrote, both of which make it clear that he’s not doing this AT ALL?
I also like how you basically accuse zk of being a rapist, etc, based solely on him mentioning that rapists exist. Classy move.
This is even more bizarre than your detailed rant about the Scott Peters winning the MAYOR’S race… BG, I think you need to put down the wine box.
November 17, 2014 at 9:10 PM #780163NotCranky
Participant[quote=scaredyclassic]For 51 years, ive seen myself as a cluttered, kind of sloppy person. It bugs my wife, but she lives with it, I guess. The story I’ve told myself is that’s just how I am, I don’t mind it, it generates creativity, other stuff. One concrete problem I had for many many years was not being able to find my wallet or keys, primarily because I would just drop things randomly and unthinkingly, mindlessly.
Reading that book made me want to try something else, and I can tell you, without judging one mode as better than another, that it is very interesting to try something new. And I love this. I love getting rid of things. I love having space around stuff. I like thinking about where im going to put things and having a place for stuff. I love pitching tons of crap. I just like it. Is this the rest of my life, progressively neater and more orderly? Well, maybe, I don’t know. Im a bingey kinda guy. It doesn’t seem like a horrible outcome to me. There’s worse things than being neat and organized. I think I’ll still be internally kinda messy, but as Im thinking now, it’s like a light went on. This is how I want to lvie from now on. I want things very orderly. I just do. I remember not caring, but now I care. I don’t think ic an go back! If you are cluttery and messy, I’d say that’s fine, but I’d encourage anyone thinking about the issue to take a looka t the book and give it a go. It might surprise you how pleasureable it is. For instance, I now take out and put away my coffee grinder each morning. I used to just leave it out. It takes a few more seconds, nothing really. And the counter looks nice! There’s so many little things like this. Maybe I’m slowly trying to wind up my affairs, over a few decades, but it is downright intoxicating to pitch old crap!
My mother is a very very orderly neat and organizaed person, and I am beginning to suspect all my self-proclaimed clutteriness is just rebellion against what she would want…[/quote]
You should give up coffee and I’ll give up clutter.
Actually this weekend we decided to fix a few problem areas. There was a large table in front of one of the great room view windows that was catching lots of stuff and we were even stuffing things under it. So we moved it to the office and put a small table with a plant there. Also , evidently I kicked my wife out of our office about a year ago and she has been using the entire kitchen table as an office and it is really kind of sad looking. We usually eat at the Island/bar and she cleans off the table for get-togethers. So I made room for her in the office again(with the table). Enjoying those changes already. Huge difference…just those little things. Plus, I am a shit for kicking her out of the office and now I am less of a shit.
November 17, 2014 at 10:43 PM #780165Participant[quote=Rich Toscano][quote=bearishgurl]The issue, zk, is that you are correlating being “tidy” with criminal behavior.”[/quote]
Uhm… what?
No, he’s not doing that at all. Did you read what he wrote, or his explanation of what he wrote, both of which make it clear that he’s not doing this AT ALL?
I also like how you basically accuse zk of being a rapist, etc, based solely on him mentioning that rapists exist. Classy move.
This is even more bizarre than your detailed rant about the Scott Peters winning the MAYOR’S race… BG, I think you need to put down the wine box.[/quote]
Sorry if you read it the way you did, Rich. For the record, I haven’t had any wine around my house for months …
I’m not accusing zk of anything. I was saying that he posted that persons who are “tidy” could be a “rapist, pedophile, cheater and spendthrift.” (Likewise, the reverse could be true.) I might be able to agree that “messy persons” could be a “spendthrift” (this goes along with the lack of paying attn to detail) but his criminal implications, to me, were way, way off the mark.
In essence, I read that he stated he himself was “messy” and that was better than being a “tidy” rapist, pedophile, philanderer or spendthrift, in so many words.
The jist of my thread about the mayor’s race was not about Scott Peters at all. It was about how incompetent Carl DeMaio would have been (and disastrous for the City) if he had been elected to ANY local political post … yes, even the rep for the 52nd.. This is because he is delusional and those delusions would have cost city taxpayers dearly.
Of course, I don’t need to tell you any of this. It has all been detailed ad nauseum in various issues of the VOSD.
I apologize here in that I have not been keeping up with the latest CDM antics and what post he was currently running for as I do not vote in the City of SD and do not watch TV. When I heard that CDM was “losing” in a close local race, “Thank God” was my knee-jerk reaction. Again, I apologize that it was for the wrong race, but I stand by “Thank God” on behalf of the City voters, all the same.
November 17, 2014 at 11:02 PM #780167ParticipantInasmuch as I can’t stand filthy people and the effect their habits have on those around them, I acknowledge that it’s not illegal to be filthy. But it could be cause for kids getting removed from their parent(s) home.
I do recognize that some of these people suffer from mental disorders which causes them to be the way they are but feel the vast majority of them have a choice and consciously choose to be lazy and unmotivated.
And “messy” is, more often than not, not the same as “filthy.” My desk is frequently “messy” because I am often drowning in paper :=0
November 18, 2014 at 12:32 AM #780170Participant[quote=bearishgurl]
Sorry if you read it the way you did, Rich.[/quote]
That’s one step below a chicken shit apology. Which is to say it’s not an apology at all.
I’m sorry if you read it the way you did?!
That’s blaming Rich for your ignorance.
How about, “I’m sorry I ranted ignorantly before I really understood the thread.”
That would be an apology.
November 18, 2014 at 12:34 AM #780169Participant[quote=bearishgurl]
Ahhh, I find this thread re-a-llly interesting. zk, you brought up some things here that indicate that YOU have your own issues that you are bringing here which have nothing to do with tidiness or cleanliness. zk, are you comparing yourself here to a pedophile or rapist who is “tidy?” What does being a pedophile or rapist have to do with tidiness?
[/quote]Can you smell peanut butter, bg? Science tells us that an early warning sign of Alzheimer’s is an inability to smell, and that if you can’t smell peanut butter, you should get further testing. I recommend that you head to the kitchen right now and check if you can smell peanut butter, because your ability to reason, which generally goes some time after the ability to smell, appears to be severely diminished.
Brian said, “clean, tidy people are superior. Superior in upbringing, and personal discipline.” I didn’t agree with this, and in order to demonstrate why I thought it was incorrect, I offered a hypothetical example of a person who was clean and tidy due to his upbringing, but was also a pedophile because of (another aspect of) his upbringing, therefore demonstrating that one could be tidy and not be superior in upbringing. I didn’t think it was that complicated at the time, but I guess I overestimated some of my audience.
[quote=bearishgurl]zk, I find it very telling that your sample “tidy person,” (above) is a male who cheats on his wife and/or can’t control his spending, etc. In essence, you’ve stated here that you are a lifelong messy person by upbringing and habit yet are now only a “tidy person” because you feel you have to be to keep your relationship together. Infidelity, inability to control spending and failing to change oil in one’s vehicle are actually equally shared traits of both genders, none of which has anything to do with being a clean or “tidy” person.[/quote]
The only reason you think is it telling that my hypothetical is a male who cheats is that you don’t understand my hypothetical. It’s not a very complicated hypothetical, but a hypothetical is abstract, and abstract thinking is an early victim of Alzheimer’s. You really should get checked. Come back after the peanut butter test, and I’ll try to explain my hypothetical again, assuming you pass.
[quote=bearishgurl]
Might you yourself be struggling with both of these traits and so that’s why you used them in this discussion? Just wondering …. [/quote]Might you be a murderer? Just wondering….
That makes as much sense as what you just said. Which is to say none at all.
But since you’re wondering, I’ll be happy to enlighten you. I have no problems with money. You don’t get a house like mine, the ability to pay it off at any time, and retire at 56, all on a government salary, if you’re not good with money. And I’ve been married 18 years and never cheated on my wife.
[quote=bearishgurl]Based upon your posts and your own admission, you’re giving 97% in your relationship. Hope you’re getting your money’s worth :=0 [/quote]
Yeah, thanks for the marital advice, divorced lady.
Obviously you missed this from a previous post of mine:
[quote=zk] But, hey, to make a marriage work, you have to work together and compromise. I do most of the giving in this particular area, but she more than makes up for it in other areas. [/quote]
So, no, I’m not giving 97% in our relationship. I’m probably giving 35-45% overall. My wife is stronger than I am and able to give more. My wife is an amazing woman, and I’m extremely lucky to have her. We’ve been married 18 years and I’m happier than ever. We know how to make a marriage work. But you wouldn’t know anything about that, would you, bg.
[quote=bearishgurl]WOW, zk, it looks like you may have dumped about $100K?? in your backyard so you could comfortably entertain your friends! If you don’t mind my asking, did that ~$100K come from your salary? Or maybe your spouse’s salary?? Is the property half yours (half yours and half your spouse’s)? [/quote]
I don’t see it in terms of who owns what percentage. It’s my family’s house.
[quote=bearishgurl]At the time you were dumping big bucks into your BY, were you aware that your spouse would later insist on you only being able to entertain just six people at a time? [/quote]
It was discussed at the time, and it was a point of contention. Concessions and compromises were made, many of them going my way and having nothing to do with the yard or the entertaining. We worked it out. That’s what people in successful marriages do.
[quote=bearishgurl]
Must all your guests be married or would your spouse approve a guest who was single? [/quote]
I have single friends and they come over regularly.
[quote=bearishgurl]And I’m wondering why you left the carpet in the house when you purchased it if you planned on entertaining large groups of people? [/quote]
We like carpet. It’s soft and warm.
[quote=bearishgurl]
Having entertained at home a lot in the past myself (up to 240 people), I WELL KNOW how much work it is before, during and after the party. But for the life of me, I don’t know why one co-owner would be able to successfully prohibit the other co-owner from doing what they expected to do with their property at the time of purchase and the time of installing those subsequent (expensive) improvements. [/quote]
I don’t see my wife as a “co-owner.” I don’t think anybody in a successful marriage does. And if you don’t understand give-and-take, it’s no wonder you’re divorced.
[quote=bearishgurl]
The issue, zk, is that you are correlating being “tidy” with criminal behavior. A person who possesses organizational skills and the motivation and perseverance to get things done (i.e. can properly manage their household) isn’t necessarily (or usually) a criminal, as you attest here. You’re bringing in lots of other criminal propensities which have nothing to do with being “tidy” or “clean.” Why you’re bringing these off-the-wall traits in here to compare with “messy people” is anybody’s guess. [/quote]
Even after I explained it to you, you still don’t get it. But, just to get an idea of what twisted reasoning you’re using, please show me where I correlated being tidy with criminal behavior, and what I said and how you construed it that you think I’ve “attested” that “a person who possesses organizational skills and the motivation and perseverance to get things done (i.e. can properly manage their household) [is] necessarily (or usually) a criminal.”
[quote=bearishgurl]What you’ve posted here shows that you not only were raised as a “messy person” (which is ok if you have the a partner who freely accepts that trait), but that you are on a very short leash at home. [/quote]
Giving something (tidying up after myself when I don’t really care to, and not having 60 people over at a time) does not equate to being on “a very short leash.” Yes, there is some giving involved. And there’s also some taking involved. And there’s some compromise and some work. The payoff is a very happy and content family life, and I’ll take it.
[quote=bearishgurl]
If you are ok with that (after all you claim here that you’ve been through to get your property as you want it), then so am I.
[/quote]Oh, yippee, I’m validated. Oh, wait, that was prickly bitchiness masquerading as support. Well, in that case what I meant was fuck you.
[quote=bearishgurl]Far be it from me to judge the “tacit arrangement” you have with your “co-owner,” whether you are satisfied with it … or not.
[/quote]
And yet judge you do.November 18, 2014 at 12:53 AM #780171Participant[quote=bearishgurl] his criminal implications, to me, were way, way off the mark.
[/quote]
You really do just half-assed read the thread, go off half-cocked, and then not listen at all when people point out your mistakes, don’t you? Because if you were really paying attention, you wouldn’t say “criminal implications” at this point unless you were really, really stupid. So either pay attention or go try to smell some peanut butter.
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