Welcome! I’m back east too and know that sense of entitlement you speak of well as I grew up squarely in the middle of it. Getting away from it to raise my kids is one of the main reasons I came out here myself. While beautiful, I think you are most likely to find that sense of entitlement in FBR and Santaluz. For what you described I’d focus on Olivenhain and DM. I dont think you will have any issues with that budget and could do very well at considerably lower than that.
In Olivenhain you can get a very nice home on an acre or two under $2M. The school is Olivenhain Pioneer and there are great preschool options nearby also. There are also some quality private schools. To check out Olivenhain and the surrounds I’d book a room at La Costa Resort which is very nice and would give you access to the communities surrounding Olivenhain. I live about 1 mile south of there myself. What I like best about this area is that it has a sense of community and a felling that you are someplace more than a collection of strip malls which describes much of SoCal.
For Del Mar, book a room at L’auberge Del Mar. Its a more expensive area than Olivenhain but if budget was no question for myself thats where I would go. L’auberge will put you right in the heart of DM Village and you can walk to the beach and restaurants. It will give you a great sense of life there.
Lastly, you should have no issue getting your child into school if you arrive in August. One thing you will want to be aware of is that the first day of school around here is in Mid August (usually between the 16th and 20th)
If you have specific questions, feel free to send me a Private Message and I’d be happy to hook you up with some good ideas.
