The thing about kids is that they are a 20 year commitment. From the time the line appears on that at-home preg test, the next two decades of your life are locked in. I was petrified when it happened to us as I was barely old enough to drink. Cars, homes, even in many cases marriages don’t require that long of a commitment.
Soon after our child was born, it became apparent that there is probably nothing else in life as rewarding as being a parent. I often compare it to discovering a new world: watching a 2 yo discover objects they had no idea even existed is awesome. I wouldn’t trade the parenting experience for anything. Many of the lessons I learned as a parent I apply to my professional career and other aspects of my life. Vagabond, your statement about forcing the focus off of you is beautiful and oh so true.
But it was just a phase in our life, and truthfully I’m glad it’s over. We have adapted very well to being child-less again. Our weekends are free and we live it up big time. An advantage of having kids young is that we are still relatively young now that they are gone…and we’re taking full advantage!
I’m not dissing ppl who decide parenting isn’t for them. My best friend knew he wasn’t the parenting type and it took him years of searching to find a mate who didn’t want kids. But he found her, and they are very happy.
The people I feel sorry for are those who don’t realize they are not cut out for parenting until *after* they become parents. What a mess.