THE BUSH QUIZ: THE TWENTIETH HUNDRED DAYS
by PAUL SLANSKY
Issue of 2006-08-07
Posted 2006-07-31
1. Complete George W. Bush¡¯s quote: ¡°I believe that
my job is _____.¡±
(a) to protect life. And sometimes people have to die
in order to protect life, see? And that saddens me.
(b) hard. It¡¯s a heckuva hard job. It¡¯s difficult.
But I¡¯m doin¡¯ it, see, and I¡¯m gonna keep on doin¡¯
it, because that¡¯s the job of a President.
(c) to go out and explain to people what¡¯s on my
mind. That¡¯s why I¡¯m having this press conference,
see? I¡¯m telling you what¡¯s on my mind. And what¡¯s
on my mind is winning the war on terror.
(d) to construe the laws I sign in a Presidential way.
Because that¡¯s part of being a leader, see, is
construing with your gut.
2. Who is Peter Wallsten?
(a) The partially blind reporter whom George W. Bush
mocked (¡°Are you going to ask that question with
shades on?¡±) for not removing his sunglasses while
addressing the President.
(b) The wheelchair-bound senior citizen whom George W.
Bush mocked (¡°You look mighty comfortable¡±) for not
standing in the presence of the President.
(c) The C.I.A. employee who, after delivering the
¡°Bin Laden Determined to Strike in U.S.¡± briefing,
was told by George W. Bush, ¡°All right, you¡¯ve
covered your ass now.¡±
(d) The Iraq-war amputee with whom George W. Bush
tried to bond by telling him about a scratch he got
during ¡°combat with a cedar¡± while clearing brush.
Match the number with what it quantifies.
3. At least 30,000.
4. More than 5,000.
5. Zero.
6. Around 200.
(a) Dollars¡¯ worth of merchandise that the former
Bush domestic-policy adviser Claude Allen was alleged
to have stolen from Target and other stores through a
phony refund scam.
(b) Shotgun pellets embedded in the face and upper
body of Harry Whittington by Dick Cheney.
(c) National monuments or icons that Secretary of
Homeland Security Michael Chertoff said there are in
New York City.
(d) dollars donated by Barbara Bush to a hurricane
relief fund with the stipulation that the money be
spent on software bought from a company run by her son
Neil.
7. Complete George W. Bush¡¯s quote: ¡°Nobody likes
_______.¡±
(a) it when the press commits treason.
(b) being lied to.
(c) Osama bin Laden except the Democrats.
(d) beheadings.
8. Three of these quotes were made by George W. Bush.
Which one was made by Donald Rumsfeld?
(a) ¡°Nobody likes war. It creates a sense of¡ªof
uncertainty in the country.¡±
(b) ¡°The plan [in Iraq] is to prevent a civil war,
and, to the extent one were to occur, to have the,
from a security standpoint, have the Iraqi security
forces deal with it to the extent they¡¯re able to.¡±
(c) ¡°Sometimes leaders show up who do a great
disservice to the traditions and people of a country.
¡±
(d) ¡°There are limits to how much corn can be used
for ethanol. After all, we got to eat some.¡±
Who¡¯s who?
9. John Green.
10. James B. Comey.
11. James E. Hansen.
12. Harry Taylor.
(a) The ¡°Good Morning America¡± producer who was
suspended after e-mails he sent, including one in
which he wrote, ¡°Bush makes me sick,¡± were leaked.
(b) The NASA official who said, ¡°It seems more like
Nazi Germany or the Soviet Union than the United
States,¡± after the Administration began censoring
climate scientists who tried to speak about global
warming.
(c) The Justice Department official who refused to
authorize the National Security Agency¡¯s domestic
surveillance program.
(d) The questioner at a Charlotte event who told
George W. Bush, ¡°I would hope, from time to time,
that you have the humility and the grace to be ashamed
of yourself.¡±
13. How did Dick Cheney say that the September 11th
attacks might have been prevented?
(a) If George W. Bush¡¯s father had taken out Saddam
Hussein in 1991.
(b) If the Bush Administration had been able to
eavesdrop on the hijackers¡¯ phone conversations
without court orders.
(c) If the National Security Agency hadn¡¯t waited
until September 12th to translate two messages warning
of the attacks which had been intercepted on September
10th.
(d) If even one of the F.B.I. agent Harry Samit¡¯s
more than seventy warnings that Zacarias Moussaoui was
a terrorist had been heeded.
14. Three of these quotes were made by George W. Bush.
Which one was made by Dick Cheney?
(a) ¡°I do want to give you some thoughts about what
I¡¯m thinking about.¡±
(b) ¡°They ought to learn to sing the national anthem
in English.¡±
(c) ¡°We have all the legal authority we need.¡±
(d) ¡°When you turn on your TV screen and see innocent
people die day in and day out, it affects the
mentality of our country.¡±
15. What pair of men did George W. Bush refer to as an
¡°interesting cat¡± and a ¡°dangerous dude¡±?
(a) The Iraqi Defense Minister and the Al Qaeda leader
Abu Musab al-Zarqawi.
(b) Elvis Presley and ¡°Colonel¡± Tom Parker, during
the guided tour of Graceland that Bush gave to
Japanese Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi.
(c) Owen Wilson and Matt Dillon, after a special White
House screening of ¡°You, Me and Dupree.¡±
16. What was George W. Bush talking about when he
declared, ¡°I¡¯m the decider, and I decide what¡¯s
best¡±?
(a) Pushing ahead with the Dubai ports deal despite
not having known about it until it appeared in the
media.
(b) Blocking a Justice Department probe of the
Administration¡¯s secret domestic spying operation.
(c) Keeping Donald Rumsfeld as Defense Secretary
despite calls by six retired generals for his firing.
(d) Vetoing a stem-cell-research bill.
17. What did George W. Bush say was ¡°the best
moment¡± during his years in the White House?
(a) ¡°The first day I sat at my desk in the Oval
Office and thought about all the history that happened
there and realized that now it was my turn.¡±
(b) ¡°When I caught a seven-and-a-half-pound
largemouth bass on my lake.¡±
(c) ¡°When they told me we caught Saddam in his
hidey-hole.¡±
18. True or false: When Tim Russert, the host of
¡°Meet the Press,¡± said that ¡°there were a lot of
misjudgments made¡± regarding Iraq, his guest
Condoleezza Rice pointed out, ¡°There are also some
misjudgments that were not made.¡±
19. Which of these words were among the top ten
responses in a Pew Research Center poll that asked
voters for the first word that came to mind when they
think about George W. Bush?
(a) ¡°Decisive,¡± ¡°charming,¡± ¡°brilliant,¡± and
¡°truthful.¡±
(b) ¡°Booze,¡± ¡°cocaine,¡± ¡°failure,¡± and
¡°smirk.¡±
(c) ¡°Illegitimate,¡± ¡°simian,¡± ¡°hotheaded,¡± and
¡°torture.¡±
(d) ¡°Incompetent,¡± ¡°idiot,¡± ¡°liar,¡± and ¡°ass.¡±
Answers:
(1) c, (2) a, (3) d, (4) a, (5) c, (6) b, (7) d, (8)
b, (9) a, (10) c, (11) b, (12) d, (13) b, (14) c, (15)
a, (16) c, (17) b, (18) True, (19) d
