With all due respect, I have rocked the boat more times than I care to remember. For years I lived in an extremely hostile environment of my own creation. I was outspoken, controversial, confrontational and downright hostile.
I have dealt with enormous amounts of anger in my life (you know absolutely nothing of my past). Yet, I have found that I get much better results when I am courteous, respectful and non-combative.
I operate from where I do because it is what works and produces my intended results. Safety is not even a consideration for me. I do not need any armour to operate from here. I am not intimidated by anger nor do I need to respond to it in like kind.
I am a master at intimidating others but it simply doesn’t work to further my agenda in this world. If it did, I would use it but again, my experience tells me, it is futile. It simply doesn’t work.
I agree that we need to keep the “personal stuff” out of our posts and simply take responsibility for what we are creating in our lives.
My purpose is to communicate, not alienate. Being controversial is fine if I can enlighten you to my perspective on a particular issue, but if I don’t, I have failed and only succeeded in alienating you further, causing you to dig your heels deeper into your position. No movement, no real communication except anger, hostility and frustration.
I find it interesting that when you are being attacked, you are always there. You can walk away. Sometimes the best response is none at all. You don’t have to always react to what others say. Ignore it, and it has absolutely no power over you. None. That takes real courage.
I agree, sometimes we need to “rock the boat” to get it moving. Other times, it can sink us. Chose your responses carefully.
Lastly, when anger or hostility is directed towards you, you have several options: fight, flee, get out of the way, or redirect that anger in such a way that it doesn’t harm you (this takes tremendous courage and patience, especially in a situation where your life is threatened). Then after the situation is diffused, the last thing we need to do is look at why the anger showed up in the first place.
If I truly believe I am responsible for an angry or hostile situation and the one who created it, then I can recreate it in any way I want. I have the power, not the person directing the anger at me. I am the one in control, not the angry person who is out of control.
Remember: “What you resist, persists.”
Thanks for sharing. I appreciate your investment of time to respond to my post. Rock on…
