I haven’t visited for awhile, I see you’re still stirring the pot. I think your question is valid, and although I generally don’t agree with many of your views, I don’t think it is selfish to reject a suitor due to kids – even if you have them – though it is odd, as it seems you would easily relate. The only issue is that most single men w/o kids will flat out reject dating you due to your kids.
As for my experiences, when I was younger, I dated a few women with children, and I always felt akward around them. It is difficult to really get to know someone when their kids are present, as starting a relationship is time-intensive and both parties usually want undivided attention. When it was just the two of us, I would think about her not being at home with her children… Kind of a catch-22, plus its hard to look a kid in the face after nailing their mom… I think most single men (and women) are looking for a potential partner to either date casually for fun, or if more serious, to start a family anew, both of which preclude kids to some degree. Although I had a friend who married a woman with two kids and cared for them as his own.
Also, one could construe your not wanting to date a man with children as a dislike of children in general, which could subjectively be labeled “scary”. Thus, the only viable solution is that you date a single man who shares your same views. The only one that comes to mind is davelj…
