The red flag for me would be that she told you that she didn’t know she had this huge debt (or didn’t know precisely how much it was). She has had 2-3 years to tell you about it, and, in my mind, she probably should have told you about it in the first 4-6 months of “dating” you.
Correct me if I’m wrong but I think you posted before here that you found out that your SO (fiance’?) had a huge student-loan balance that she withheld from you (even as she presumably accepted your proposal) and you eventually called off the engagement (and rightly so) because you didn’t want to be left stuck holding the bag, especially if you later had children and she left work for a period of time.
As far as the character of her parents, she’s not responsible if they were addicted, had bad credit, FC’s, BK’s or did jail time, etc, but you have to ask yourself who her “role models” were growing up.
kev, I can’t remember how old you said you were, but, contrary to popular belief, as you get older, you will realize that there are more and more single people in your age group. They may or may not want to have more kids or be able to have kids, though, if a biological family is what you ultimately seek.
I wouldn’t trust her to tell me the truth about money so that alone would be a deal killer for me getting back with her.
