Rustico – I can only speak for myself. I have had extremely successful relationships w/men some of whom I am still very good friends with. They have made decisions to not have children. Some have actually, like Dave, had vasectomies. That is their decision and I do not think they are necessarily bad for that. In fact, responsible on their part. On the other hand, since at the time I wanted to have a baby, I knew that was not a relationship that I should be in b/c the person I would want to be with should also want the same thing as far as I wanted, a family.
If I found myself in this situation more than once, then I imagine there may be other women in a similar predicament. I don’t know if it’s b/c of “Generation Me” but my experience is that fewer men are choosing the path of wanting children. It is not a question of whether a man and woman get along, but more a question of finding a man who is inclined to want a family.
That said, I did not want to sacrifice “love” for merely the desire to have a child. In other words, I would not settle to be w/a man purely to have a child. I would like “love” to be in that mix and so if there wasn’t that feeling of love, then some of the men who I met that wanted children were not someone to be w/for that sole reason. Compatibility is also important.
As far as “needed”, I know that is a touchy topic for men. Many want to feel needed and some like to sense their need gives them power, indispensible. But as I said, women are not so helpless nowadays. We want men in our lives for love and personally the men I have been w/were loved and cared for and wanted and appreciated and respected. Need should not be confused with want.
It applies to material objects certainly and many piggs know the difference between buying “things” b/c of want or need, being a consumer or saving b/c the item is just a want not a need.
I say this should apply to relationships. Being wanted has more value than being needed, in that respect, MPO. Want is a desire, decision/choice.
