“It would feel, to me, like stealing if I were to stop making the payments completely. I did enter into an agreement with the lender and I should continue to meet that agreement.”
DJNinSD, I think you’re looking at this the wrong way. You did enter into an agreement with the lender. Part of that agreement was that if you stopped making payments, they could take away your home. Remember, both you and your lender agreed to those terms. So if you stop making payments, walk out of your house, and give the keys to the lender, then you are fulfilling the terms of your agreement. Your lender thought those terms were fair when they gave you the loan. There’s no reason why those terms aren’t fair now.
Realistically, given your mortgage to income ratio, you should have never bought that house … and the lender never should have given you that loan. It was a bad business deal for both of you. But that’s in the past. Learn from it and move on. You are where you are now and you have to make the best of the situation.
Your number one priority should be your family. When it comes down to it, no one else is going to look out for them except for you. You should definitely do what’s best for your family.
At this point there is no realistic way that you’ll ever be able to pay off your house. You can either default now or keep making payments until you default later. My advice would be to walk out now and use the money you save to take care of your family. This solution is both fair to the lender and in the best interest of your family.
