Having lived in RSF for many years, and raised our children here, I agree with all of the above, and also, don’t care for Cielo. Many people we know have decided against Cielo for many of the reasons you mentioned, however, if you decide to pursue that option, I would also suggest renting there first.
It’s a large investment, and I think it would be wise to have all of your questions answered firsthand before you make your decision.
There are challenges to living in RSF, especially when you have children, but, like you, since we have never been concerned with regular commuting schedules, if you prefer having a large home with acreage, not far from the coast, and still relatively close to everything you need and want, you will love it here.
Also, you might want to check out other homes in the 92067, 92130, and other zip codes of interest at sdlookup.com. It’s a great resource, and we’ve recommended it to many friends who have relocated here.