DomoArigato
This happened last week at my house. Tell me what you think.
I show up at my house one evening with a brand new Lexus,I threw $100k of gold jewelry on the dining room table, and told my wife that I had arranged for all new appliances and furniture to be delivered the next day. I told her that i just loved her and Timmy so much that they deserved the best!You would think that she would be happy But instead her face got kinda screwy and contorted and she started to ask me all of these questions.
She asked me if we had won the lottery, even though she knows that my position on that topic is that only poor ignorant people play the lottery. She asked me if we have any rich relatives that she did not know about. Of course not it’s always been just she and I, I gently reminded her. (At this point I started to think that she may be getting a little senile). She proceeded with so many questions like didn’t I remember that we were barley able to save in out 401k and that Timmy’s college fund was still woefully short. That our savings account was so short that we had decided not to go to Vegas last Christmas.God, when did she turn in to so much of a crackpot, I asked myself?
I sat her down. I could not believe she was being so dense. But she has always needed these little things explained to her. I told her: ” you deserve the best, and all these things are now yours!”
She sobbed and said, ” But how can we afford them?” Ha. What a relief, I thought that she may be depressed and not be feeling worthy, what a relief I felt then!!!
Honey, that’s easy, ” I just maxed out all our credit cards…..you must have forgot that we have outstanding credit!”
I would love to tell you that solved what as I can only describe as her new mental illness but this seemed to make her feel worse. Again, I tried to explain…..honey we may be stretched a bit but if the monthly payments get a little too high we simply we ask for a higher credit limit. She told me the stupidest thing….that one day they may tell us that we can not have more credit. Can you believe her? I then let her know that I could just move to another credit card company. This did not have the effect on her that I had planned. SHE TURNED INTO AN OLD COOT right in front of my eyes. I swear that her eyebrows got bushier in an instant.
Domo….I have decided to get a divorce. I can’t live with this old bag anymore….she is just to darn short sighted.
By the way I had to rent a new place and need 5k for a deposit. Can you give me a loan?, I know how gracious you are and I just don’t think I deserve to have to fill out all Of those nosey banker forms that they want to make me fill out to get a loan throuh them. They just do not understand that you and I deserve so much more. I guess you would agree you and I deserve each other. Thanks BRO.
