[quote=Blogstar]You didn’t get in trouble with me for arguing over how much house work is worth. It’s your frequent insistence, perhaps barely weakening now , that
women are better than men and always have been. We have been around on this 3 or 4 times since this blog started and it’s always the same. I find it impossible to think that men are better than women or the other way around…so I don’t whine about it.
Men are not “coming around’ finally any more than male rabbits or female kangaroos are.That’s a huge condescending insult. Culture changes more rapidly in humans and probably faster now than ever. We are animals and it is impossible that G-d made one sex better than the other.
Neither you or I had parents who were reasonably good couples cooperating in making functioning home and then supporting each other after, out of loyalty continued love and friendship or any other reasons .They were not mr,. and ms. UCGAL by a long stretch. We had no one show us to be grateful to one another and trust that it’s pretty easy to be o.k. with our partners. Whatever we saw was the opposite. Lots of crippled perception and insecurity from that gets transferred to our world view with the opposite sex /male female relations can come from that. It just fits the definition of how people get long term hurt from dysfunctional families. KEV might be in the same boat but that’s for him to say.
Apologizing for psychoanalyzing you, but I wouldn’t be surprised if some of your energy and bias and stubbornness on this comes from that.[/quote]
Where, exactly, have I said the bolded part?
And it IS true that men have come around over the past couple of decades; every bit of sociological research out there will show you this. That’s not a criticism, it’s a compliment.
Edited to add:
While I think my family life was likely better than yours by a long shot (though we certainly share some experiences as wards of the state), I would agree that my perceptions have been colored by my experiences, as well as the experiences of many other families I’ve known…including my husband’s experience with his family, and my mother’s experience with her family, and my father’s experience with his family, etc., etc.
As a manager in the corporate world, I had to interview women in their 50s and 60s who had been abandoned by their husbands (who often left for women about the age, or even younger than their own children) after decades of raising many children and devoting their lives to their families. Sorry if you disagree, but that is flat-out wrong. The stories I’ve heard were completely devastating. After my parents divorced, my mother rented out rooms to make ends meet, and most of her renters were other divorced people (men and women) who had all kinds of similar experiences that have most definitely colored my perceptions.
In addition to this, and largely because of my experiences, I had studied family formation trends and their effects on the economy. I have thousands of pages of studies, books, etc. that back what I am saying here.
FWIW, I married my husband largely because he, too, had experienced the same things in his family. We have vowed to change the course of our family histories, and have been fortunate enough to have found our “soul mates.” Though we had to work through some very rough patches, especially in the beginning, we are stronger for it. There is nobody in the world who I respect or love more…nobody even comes close. I was also blessed to have a wonderful father, though he was a rather miserable husband because he was pretty emotionally stunted (an understatement), especially when it came to romantic relationships.
So, should we ignore everything that we have experienced and researched in order to wear the mask of political correctness, or should we be honest about what we have seen?
