[quote=bearishgurl][quote=SD Realtor]I see it different. I have a few friends who have served and been called up. One of the tenants in a rental I have has served as well. I saw first hand the stress that the entire family had to endure during his deployments.[/quote]
[quote=CA renter]Yep. Just today, I was with someone whose husband deployed last week for seven months in Iraq. The family is a mess. I have no idea how they do it. It’s absolutely heartbreaking . . .[/quote]
SDR and CA renter, I was a military spouse myself for 26 years, 15 of those years the spouse of an active duty member. In that time, my ex was deployed 28 times (some short deployments). We owned all our properties and I managed the rentals myself, all in SD. In addition, I worked FT the entire duration of the marriage (there was no FML act until 1993 – if I didn’t return to work after 6-10 wk. maternity leave, I would have lost my job). Neither of us had/have any family in SD. Just prior to retirement (15 yrs ago) we were recieving $688 per month from the military in BAQ and FHA combined. NOW, the same-ranked member recieves OVER $2000 MONTH for housing allowance in SD. There are many more programs with spouses and mil. families now than there used to be and the Comm/Exchanges carry so many more products and are much more modern (for ex. the food and pharmacy checkouts used to be outside). Tricare can now be used with most doctors, unlike the old Champus, where you had to apply for a “Statement of Non-Availability,” from Naval Hospital before you could see a civilian physician. The housing units in SD (never lived in any of them) used to be substandard, some with concrete floors and walls. A “spouse” and “family” did not come in the member’s seabag back then, so they were just “extra baggage” for the member/Navy to have to “deal with.”
SDR and CA renter, if your military friends are in distress, IMO it is because they are NOT CONTACTING THEIR OMBUDSWOMAN/MAN FOR ASSISTANCE. It is also likely that they are NOT managing their money correctly and the MEMBER is the ONLY one bringing income into the family. There is no reason with that large of a housing allowance (or a free unit and utils in lieu) that they should be in financial distress. Remember, they get free or very low cost medical benefits also.
Spouses of military personnel KNEW what they were getting into when they married an already enlisted member, so IMHO, “whining” is counter-productive. If they are fed up with being an active-duty spouse, then tell them to get a divorce and give up the I.D. and all the benes that go along with that. Sorry if I don’t seem too sympathetic here.[/quote]
bearishgurl,
Neither SDR nor I ever said anything about financial distress. In the situation I was referring to, it was the emotional stress that was so bad. The kids are crying and acting up every day, all day long. The mother was not whining; I could just see what was going on. I’m doing the whining for her. She’s the wife of a career Marine, and she says she knew what she was getting into.
Still, getting married to an enlisted person when you are young and childless — and when there are NO WARS — is very different from having kids and having your spouse go off to a war zone.
The benefits should have always been good. However, I’m sure they’re better now because of the protracted wars our illustrious politicians have forced us into.
Personally, I don’t think the fact that benefits were worse when your spouse was serving justifies them not having better benefits now. We owe our military personnel the very best we can give them, especially in times of war.
BTW, 15 years ago, housing prices were about 50% lower than they are now, and rents were quite a bit lower, too; so the difference you noted in housing allowances isn’t nearly as great as it might first seem.
