as FLU pointed out already, Asian competition is huge.
Asian parents also expect to be taken care of when they are older, and therefore they have a lot of skin in the game in regard to how well their kids turn out.
There is also a huge history of cultural tendency for authoritarian methods.
The mix of the above is really the basis for this so-called “Chinese mothering technique.”
Asian parents, apart from ones that’s westernized, are mostly quite dictatorial. Hence the children become highly disciplined, and rebellions are crushed ruthlessly. This creates extreme favoritism that I can see in almost every Asian family I know. You see this approach all the way up to how corporations treat its employees, how governments treat its citizens, and even how countries treat each other (for example, Chinese missiles and severe diplomatic pressures when Taiwan elects an anti-China president, and sweetheart trade deals if they elect a pro-China one). Of course, if someone’s daughter is a doctor and a violinist, then other aspects such as marrying outside of race might be more easily forgiven.
The ultimate drivers in this ruthless dictatorial method are the need for the kids to do better to ensure a secure retirement and because of the inter-Asian competition. the Asian mother is in constant competition mode, competing about her house, her husband, and most importantly, her kids. To give you an idea about Asian competition, think about why computers have gotten so cheap (inter-Asian cut throat competition to one up each other for market share). The ferocious inter-mother competition translate to 4 hour piano practices for the kids.
But all of this is at the extreme. Most Asian kids do not practice for 4 hours a day, most do not go to Kumon. Most simply take their studies seriously and do their work and pay attention in class.
All in all, the reason for the book (that was the original topic afterall) is meant to shock. Because the bottom line is America needs the shock and it is in desperate need to wake up from its stagnating ways.
Afterall, human history is filled with fallen empires that did so because it collapsed from within (the Roman, the Tang dynasty, the Spanish, the British). All collapsed because it was the most powerful without any challengers. And at its most powerful stage is when its people become complacent and ultimately collapse. We should be glad Chua wrote this book because if American parents simply take up a few of her pointers, perhaps we won’t continue down our steady decline.
