[quote=flu] Can I be in charge of the Worker’s Union Advocacy Group and Task Force for Fair Compensation (WUAGTFFC)? My first call to action would be to put in place the following efficient management structure to manage 5 people to do the actual work….
1 shift supervisor
1 shift supervisor’s supervisor
1 associate project manager
1 associate program manager
1 senior project manager
1 senior program manager
1 director of operations that both the senior project manager and program manager report to
I’m fine with the director of operations reporting to me.
I have no idea yet what the actual 5 people will be working on. But I’m confident that regardless of the work, we need 5 people to do the actual work, and the aforementioned efficient management team (EMT) to manage tasks such as encouraging 5 people to think of ideas of what movie/show to make, screwing in lightbulbs, etc.
Also, while we are at it, let’s schedule a meeting to discuss when we should have the next meeting to discuss how we should plan to run a business at the next meeting.
Thank you for your cooperation…
-Flu,
VP of Union Affairs[/quote]
Work? WORK?!? Who said anything about work?
Do you realize what it’s going to cost us to hire workers that are capable of working? We’re a fledgling small business, and once the elections are over, Congress will go back to giving small businesses the finger – and a bipartisan one, at that. No, we can only afford to hire workers who are incapable of working.
This is an important distinction, flu. As the VP of Union Affairs, you’ll be expected to make those distinctions, and also handle all of the boring business stuff that the remainder of the cabal are too busy, dumb, or bored to handle. For the forseeable future, this may include changing lightbulbs. Be sure to check on the latest directive from Washington, DC, on what size and type of bulbs area approved for use.
Given enough time, we can manage to screw up the company enough to ensure that the government bails us out. Rest assured that I have consulted the latest actuarial tables and the National Enquirer horoscope column to determine the precise month and year for this, so as to have contracts drawn up guaranteeing that all company execs and board members receive their performance-based bonuses after we’ve been fired .
